husbands? Well....we all made a conscious choice to marry them didn't we? We choose who we marry. So didn't we bring some of these problems on ourselves? Did we not take enough time to really get to know them? Did we settle because we were afraid to be alone? And...Yes....husbands change but few turn into Mr. Hyde once you say I Do. Sometimes I think women forget this fundamental fact.
What cha think?
2007-08-08 10:03:55 · 18 answers · asked by Lakin J 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you are right if they take all that energy they spend complaining and actually use it towards some positive changes in their own life then it would all work out. I personally never complain about anything....if something is wrong i fix it.
2007-08-08 10:09:58 · answer #1 · answered by ~NIKKI~ 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think some problems are a result of not knowing each other. Others are a result of growing apart or sharing intimate experiences with others. Sometimes, a man can really fool you. Sometimes men make mistakes. I think most women on here aren't really "griping and carrying on", they are just trying to vent in a place that offers anonymity. (One warning though, if anyone knows one question you've asked, they can find all the other ones you asked as well.)
2007-08-08 17:15:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men and women change. Remember ladies, it's not exactly a picnic for us guys all the time either. Men usually just internalize. So if your feeling like you've married the wrong guy, he probably feels the same way about you. So decide to make it work, but start the project with yourself.
2007-08-08 17:07:51 · answer #3 · answered by Brian M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well not ALL women are like this. But I think many of them tend to float in and out of this category, just as most men are NOT *ssholes that are emotionally introverted, but most of us have been like that at one time or another.....
I think both sides in the battle of the sexes are guilty of getting complacent in their relationship and their roles. They take the other for granted, they make their spouse's needs a last priority, secondary to work, kids, extended family, community obligations, etc...... The spouse gets relegated to the last on the list, hey there here - they'll always be here, I'll get to them tomorrow, then tomorrow they go to the bottom of the "to do" list again.
People also change. The person you are married to in 5 years is NOT the one you walked down the isle with. If you go into it thinking this will be the case, then you are folling yourself and setting yourself up for disappointment.
I also agree that many women think they can "fix" their man. Funny thing is, those little things about his personality that you once thought of as "interesting quirks" are now more like nails on a blackboard. You notice them more and it bugs you more over time. This is true for both partners.
Example: My wife goes NUTS because I like to chew my ice in my drink. Not chomp it with my mouth open (although she'd disagree), but I chew it. Always have since I was a kid. I did it when we were dating, heck I did it at our wedding reception !!! But now after 10 years of marriage it bugs the sh*t out of her ??? Well why wasn't it a deal breaker when we were dating? Guess it really wasn't THAT bad?
That's just a little example of the things that start out as cute or unique that turn into "10 things I can't stand about my spouse".
My father gave me only ONE piece of advice when I got engaged. I laughed it off at the time, but after 11 years of marriage, I understand how true it rings:
"A woman should never marry a man thinking she can change or improve him. A man should never marry a woman thinking she'll never change."
How true.
2007-08-08 17:30:46 · answer #4 · answered by aa889d 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh I don't know. I married a wonderful guy that I grew up with. It was wonderful and then after about 2 years he became addicted to methamphetamine. I couldn't have seen that coming even if I were physic.
You have a point though, instead of complaining I took my kids and left.
2007-08-08 17:24:47 · answer #5 · answered by delfamily 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You r right..But also you r wrong....I think we may all change a littel, but after I got married my husband started picking his nose right in front of me and flicking his burgers on the carpet and then he started to uHHHHH you know masturbate and leave his droppings on the carpet..not using a towel or anything to clean it up, so the carpet was ruined..we are not animals*&*^*&%**(^%*%&$%&^*^*%*^*^*(^(^(^*(*)* so I am sorry but that is not acceptable from anyone...and believe me he didn't do this before we were married...so yes people do change because they lose respect and think "they have you" and it's like I took care of business I didn't throw my used sanitary products on the floor..I wrapped them in toilet paper and threw them in the trashcan.****Now ex -husband
2007-08-08 17:31:28 · answer #6 · answered by AlphaFeGreatWhite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope I am not one of them women. I hate women like that. There are also men like that , tho. They are real downers to be around. Griping alot is not a good personality trait to have.
2007-08-08 20:54:38 · answer #7 · answered by I39 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I totally agree...just as some men choose to marry women who they say tend to nag.... and they should have known that before marrying them.
2007-08-08 17:09:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that we all change, men and women. I think that we choose to be mad or to be happy. I just think that if one truly loves the other, both will have to compromise, and enjoy each others annoyance.
2007-08-08 17:15:47 · answer #9 · answered by 0000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some women just can't deal with the harsh reality.
2007-08-08 21:48:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋