why wont men pay for the upbringing of the children they leave behind?

Answer 1

I don't think it's fair to generalise that to every man! Some do though, and it's a mystery to me why they wouldn't want to be involved in their child/rens life and to support them financially.

Answer 2

There could be any number of reasons why your baby's daddy is not paying you to support your child. But, there is no excuse for him not to help out with the financial needs of your child.

By the way, I am a man, and I do pay for the upbringing of my child, along with her mother. I would thank you not to stereotype me with the men that abandon their children. Also I would add that I am sure that I am not the only man that helps to pay for the upbringing of his child.

I think that if you look into the subject, you will find that most men do support their children.

Answer 3

Despite my own personal situation I would have to agree that your statement is a generalization but I understand where the frustration comes from. I have twins by a man who are almost ten and he has done everything he could not to step up and own his responsibility. He has been in jail multiple times, and even fought the deupties who were arresting him because he didn't want to go back to jail. He has lied and hidden his income so he would not have to pay additional support and his wife helped him-but he got his-we finally went back to court and not only did my order increase from less than $300 a month to over $1,000 a month, the judge also made the order retroactive! But on the flip side my husband and I have been together since they were less than a year (they are 10 now) and he has always supported them, worked hard for them, and in general did what a man does for his family-support them. Some males are men and some males just have a ****. that makes them anatomically equipped to be men.

Answer 4

I thought about this and my solution would be we had adverts which we slag off dead beat dads like drunk drivers. Then when a man does not pay after lots of attempts and debts are mounting up do all the proposed things driving licience taken off them and passport. Also the csa has to be more keen to find these fathers and hound them and not allow them to take out any debts such as mortgage or loans until they pay up. I would also not allow them to get married, leave the country, drive a car, be a company director, take up any educational course, borrow any money the list could go on. This may help them pay up but socail responsibility is someone instilled into you from your own parent. Men who do this sort of stuff have tend to have strange relationships with their mothers, which in turn have spoilt their adult lives. As eventually a man never gains after running away, they should be pity, but it is sometimes really their mothers not insisting on responsible behaviour. Have you ever came across a man who does or would do this from a completley decent, respectable, stable family? It just does not happen. It is us women too, the way we bring up our son. Their is also far too much underclass now who know their right but don't have a clue about responsibility.

Answer 5

Lots of men do pay but you rarely get to hear about the ones who understand the responsibility. My husband doesn't pay for his daughter - I know why - I don't agree with it but I understand it. My son's father never has paid a bean but does buy him stuff. Again, I understand why so I just put up with it. Each case is different. There are some guys who just seem to be able to walk away from their children without a thought but a good majority of them are great dads - but the money thing is something they feel very strongly about. Its got nothing to do with the love they have for their children - more to do with disliking the mother and resenting her getting any benefit from their labours. They don't see that the mothers well being has a direct consequence on the well being of their children!

Answer 6

I know many men that would make better full time parents than their wives who have custody of the children, it is not always the case that a man does not want to support his kids, there are many women that make it very hard for their ex-partners to be part of their children's lives, you cannot generalise, there are bad men and bad women out there.

Answer 7

because they are losers and the feel that they don't need to. They feel by paying child support they are help their ex and that don't want to do that. the only person they are hurting is the kid, but they can't see it that way. My ex owes me thousand of $ and never sees or calls his kid and he doesn't seem to care that he is missing out on his son. I am blessed to have meet and married another man who is a great father and wants to be my sons father. The money is nice to get, but the kids are better off without the dead beats. If you really need it, all states have child support inforcement that can help you get it. Good luck

Answer 8

They seem to have this strange notion that they don't need to because they either don't see them (which isn't totally fair on either child or father) or that they don't see them enough. However, having said that i know some women who take the maintenance and the kids never get anything out of it and the women spend it on their wardrobes, nights out and fancy holidays without the kids. So i don't always blame some men.

Answer 9

I'm a man and I do.

I also know 3 other men who also pay for their childrens upbringing, so don't tar everyone with same brush.

Answer 10

I am sorry for your views i can tell you if i split with my wife i would move heaven and earth to make sure my daughter was looked after i find your question insulting one bad man don t make us all the same. Also my brother is a prat in most ways but he pays for his kids he gives his ex wife £800 a month and buys her a car once a year

Answer 11

Most men are being responsible over their kids. My best advice is to not pick a bad apple to start with. Don't judge all men by one or two bad apples.