What event from your childhood?

Question

do you feel most helped to shape the person you would become?

Consolatory purr @ FTW: I know what being told you are ugly and having people break down your confidence constantly is like.

Answer 1

I checked into the ER after a week of teaching at summer camp. My throat was swelling shut and by the end of the week of me being sick I was pretty dehydrated. I really thought I was going to die, because I couldn't really lift my arms to even cross them, and I wasn't moving too quickly when I walked, as my body was shutting down. Even as I was laying in the bed in the ER I passed out and then jerked/jumped back awake... But the nurses were so great to me. Anything I said they did and took great care of me. I mean I said that my throat hurt and I couldn't swallow anything, not even water. They got me meds for my IV, even the doctor in training who gave me my IV was so nice to me. But after being pumped with fluids I actually started to become hungry. Which was the first time in days, because again I couldn't swallow anything because of my throat. The one nurse heard me say outloud I'm hungry, I didn't even say it to her, but she heard me and was like, "oh would you like a popsicle" and got it for me. I was stunned! That was actually what shaped me as a young adult to go into Nursing. Because while the doctor came and checked on me, the nurses actually cared, and helped me. I hope that one day I can give someone what they gave me that day. :)

Answer 2

When I was still in grade school, about two or three months before we were to move away (we were a service family), I intentionally came out to two of the loudest mouths in school by trying to seduce them (I will never understand why I did this) and I was ostracized by everyone. Worse still, my closest friend of almost two years, whom everyone else thought was a flaming queen, disowned me on the spot. We never saw or spoke to each other again.

The only friend I really had left in those final weeks of hell was a girl named Ruby, a sad child who was always picked on because she was grossly overweight. I don't think I'd said more than four words to her the whole time we were in school, but she was the only one to come over and talk to me in the cafeteria after it had happened. I remember walking down the hallway holding hands with her once, in spite of all the looks and the snickers. It just felt good to have at least one person on my side, especially since I wouldn't dare tell my parents what had really happened.

The whole incident taught me that once you've made the choice to be who you are, that you have to stick by that decision, no matter what the consequences. And even when things get bad, they're never as worse as they could be.

Answer 3

Having perfectionistic parents sure helped. I'm a huge perfectionist now, always having goals, motivation, striving to be "the best" at everything I do or attempt.

That and the abuse in my childhood helped me to be the kind, open minded, listening kind of person I am today.

In high school, the kids teasing me, making fun of me for being smart, (and a lesbian) helped me to learn pity, and that ignorance breeds hate. This helped me to become someone interested in teaching and helping others. I could complain about the ignorance, or I could do something about it. To this day, I still care for those who refuse to give a rat's patootie about me. I'm a health professions major. Whether people realize it or not..they may hate me for who and what I am, but I still have a responsibility to them for caring for their health when they step into that clinic or hospital.

Working in a nursing home where my aunt, who has cerebral palsy lived, helped a lot too. It helped me become open minded, compassionate, and able to see things in ways I didn't before. I saw how many mentally handicapped people were dumped in nursing homes by a family that supposedly "loved' them and then never saw them again. I swore to myself that I would never be a person like that. That I would make a conscious effort to treat EVERYONE as though they are worthy of love and respect. Everyone has the ability to learn, just in different ways.

Answer 4

To most of the outside world, it seemed like I had they idyllic childhood. Two loving, caring parents, a twin brother who was (and still is) my best friend and my older sister who doted on the pair of us.
But to me I felt I was living in a nightmare. After my twin and I reached the age of six, my mother went back to full time employment, and we had a child minder. With the two parents I idolised both in work a lot I resented the childminder because I felt she was trying t take the place of my mother. I felt unloved, but never told my parents about it until I was much older.
Also, my parents were perfectionists, and I took this to mean that they wanted all of their children to do well in school, and I struggled to have a social life and balance doing well in school, so apart from my brother and sister I had very few friends until I went to secondary school. I also feared that my parents would reject their "unperfect" son after I came to terms with my sexuality.
As it turns out, however, my parents told me a few years back that all they really wanted for us was for us to feel happy and loved, and not to miss out on the things the other kids had. I did track down my childminder from my youth a few years back and apologised for the things I did and said to her. She and I are good friends now and her kids call me uncle which is nice!
So I guess my insecurity and selfishness as a child made me realise that in the real world, selfishness would win me very few friends, and insecurity would lead to a lifetime of self doubt and indecisiveness.

Answer 5

It wasn't just one event, but a series of them. I had an alcoholic father, which threatened to ruin the childhoods of all the three children in the family. My elder brother indulged in substance abuse, while the eldest one moved out of home to pursue further studies and his career. I was still battling with my sexuality. It was my mother's sheer determination to keep the family from falling apart that we could complete our education, and I learnt a lot from my mother. Her strength gave me courage to carry on, and she let me be who I was all the while. I only wish I'd told her about me when she was alive, though I believe she knew. Today, when I look back at those times, I have really come far, and have gained a lot of positives from the negatives we faced. I know exactly the kind of person I will never be, and I know where I draw my strength from.

Answer 6

The decline of my mother for a few years and when I was like 10 she died. It forced me to step up to the plate and take charge of the little ones to a degree. Since I didn't have a lot of play time I entertained myself by reading. In the long run all that reading helped with school and the leadership skills I developed early on got me ahead of most others around me.

Answer 7

When I had my first crush on a guy (that I remember) and we kissed for the first time. It was a defining moment, because then at the age of 11 I knew being what I am is something that is worth fighting for!

Answer 8

Don't know really. I mean, lots of stuff happened, but nothing all that traumatic. I was never abused, molested, beaten, neglected or overly teased.
I guess I had a fairly boring childhood.

The first traumatic event that happened in my life wasn't until I was a teenager. I guess it had something to do with who I am, but it didn't change me I've always had the same values and such. That event just solidified my resolve.

Answer 9

Being thrown out of the house at 15 for being gay is a huge one. However having been told my whole life up to that point, every damn day, that I was ugly and had no personality was a major factor in developing my severe lack of self-confidence.

Answer 10

In The 4th grade (and that's been a long long time ago) the ugliest boy in school made me a special valentines with the help of his mother. When he gave it to me I was so embarrassed and scared that others would make fun of me I threw it to the ground and slapped him. The hurt i saw in his eyes still haunt me today (I'm in my 40's). I learned right at that moment never to take anyones feelings for granted. I did see him a few years ago as our children attend the same school. I apologized and cried like a baby as did he. I knew I hurt him but it wasn't until that point that I realized how deeply, I always told myself that he probably didn't even remember...He did. I tell my kids that story all the time so they know that their actions can be felt for a life time.

Answer 11

Just growing up looking at my father, his personality, his attitude, his arrogance, his ignorance, the way he treated my mom, the way he treated his children. I knew i wanted to be the complete opposite of him. I have done a pretty good job so far, but somethings i just can't change.