Does it seem that a death in the family is more likely to cause a rift than bring people closer together?

Answer 1

When people are greedy and its about money issues then yes!!

Answer 2

I'm wondering how this got to be a subject about wills, and money, and belongings. Is it?

I imagine that sometimes death causes a rift because of the pain that the loss of a person brings. When people come together, they are reminded of who isn't present (and will never be), and that sometimes is too much to take.
It's a little bit like denial or escapism.

Sometimes it just seems better not to be reminded of the pain of losing a loved one by association. It doesn't make it right, and you may be overlooking the best way to relieve you of the pain.

Answer 3

It really can go either way...

It can bring people closer together, when say, relatives who live hundereds of miles of miles apart gather for the first time in years for the funeral.

It can also cause rifts when, for example, family members fight over the deceased's estate.

A host of other things can cause rifts, or closer bonds.

It depends on the circumstances.

Answer 4

It really depends on the family. In my experience, it caused a rift. When the person that kept the peace in our family died, it brought out all of my family's insecurities and jealousies, which eventually led to petty arguments over money, which in turn led to estrangement between some siblings. It's a sad outcome so I'd prefer to think that the majority is brought closer together.

Answer 5

I think initally it brings people closer together but in time is causes families to drift. When the loss initially occurs, everyone calls each other and comes over to comfort one another. However, in time, the family will usually tend to drift especially if the person who died was the thread holding the family together. For instance, when my grandparents died everyone was really close for about a year. But after that, the family didn't talk much because we would always meet up at our grandparents house on weekends and Holidays. Once those threads that were holding the family together disapeared, so did our family.

Answer 6

In my husband family it caused a big rift. The Sister went and sold all of the Mothers stuff without asking the brothers & sisters. Told them that they cannot come over to the house and have any more barbeques and or parties.

Answer 7

Depends on circumstances.
Was someone at fault or made a decision to cause or hasten the death?
If the death is natural I would expect the death to bring people closer.
The Will may tear families apart though.

Answer 8

I believe it does cause in our family after the death of mom and dad, the family seems to fall apart. I guess everyone has their own ways of dealing with the stress of death and separation of families is number 1 based on various reasons.

Answer 9

I think both, at first it will bring them together, then afterwards, it can cause a rift.

Answer 10

Yes, since my father-in-laws death 3 yrs ago, I haven't talked to my husbands side,

But the same can be said for weddings too, I haven't talk to mine since I got married either.

Weddings and Funerals either bring out the best or the worst in people, in both instances it's both sides that are f*cked up!!

Answer 11

Probably because all the family can't agree on how the deceased funeral arrangements should be carried out. There is always one control freak that wants to run the show...