I believe that eye-contact is invasive. I avoid making eye contact with people until I feel "connected" to them on some level. I think it's an issue of power and those that stare at my eyes are almost "stealing" from me; crossing over a boundary. I know it sounds odd, but in other cultures it isnt that uncommon. I live in the U.S. and people think that i'm creepy or very nervous when I wont look them in the eye.
2007-08-07 23:31:30 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I thought I was the only one who felt that way! I totally agree with you...when someone stares into my eyes it feels like an invasion...almost a violation...I really don't like it, unless (like you said) I know that person well and am comfortable with them. Otherwise, I feel like they are taking something away from me....(sounds crazy, I know)...like I'm giving them a window into my soul...which would be o.k. if I knew that person enough to trust him/her with such intimate details of my inner self. I think this comes from having had relationships with people who have been abusive in one form or another...and I'm not a trusting person anymore. I like to keep what's inside me, inside me...if someone can read me through my eyes, then they have a certain "power" over me, a way to hurt me if they chose to...sounds nutty, I know. But I really think it's a product of being deeply hurt one too many times. We become much more guarded with our feelings, our emotions. We realize that not everyone needs to know them...that some people will use them against us. Does this make sense?
Unfortunately, most of the rest of society sees someone who doesn't like to make eye-contact as someone who is a liar. I don't lie. I just don't like to let people in until I know I can trust them.
2007-08-07 23:58:48 · answer #1 · answered by It's Ms. Fusion if you're Nasty! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may not be completely insane, but there may be some issue there.
Sure, other countries have their own beliefs about eye contact...but I don't think any of them maintain that eye contact is a way to steal the other's soul!
Rather, often times in the Far East, a junior person making eye contact with a senior person is a sign of great disrespect.
2007-08-07 23:40:47 · answer #2 · answered by powhound 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no law that says that eye contact is necessary and there are many who feel much the way you do. They have some sort of internal anger in them and they cant get hold of it soon enough to keep it from being picked up by another who does go straight to the heart through eye contact. So they divert their look until they feel more secure about the person who they are with. And many who may give you the straight in the eye look may in reality be looking at something else like minute facial movements etc. A doctor will look you in the eye and will diagnose partly based on what he sees. And I have learned that the straight in the eye look can be a distraction when one is about to be assaulted by someone with a weapon in hand.
2007-08-07 23:53:56 · answer #3 · answered by JORGE N 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand what you are saying, but I do believe in making eye contact with people. I am uncomfortable with eye contact that lasts more than 10 or 15 seconds at a time though.
2007-08-07 23:37:01 · answer #4 · answered by jingles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are insane, but it is something you need to get over. Many people are suspicious of a person who won't make eye contact, and they don't feel comfortable talking to someone who doesn't look them in the eyes. It comes across as insincere, and others may think you are not interested in taking to them, or that you are lying.
It sounds like you are quite guarded and reserved. It is important to realize that avoiding eye contact with someone will tell them more about you than your actual eyes will. People can't read your thoughts just by looking you in the eye, but you are saying 'I am not comfortable talking to you' by not looking them in the eye.
2007-08-07 23:52:48 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The interaction of the Earth magnetic field with solar wind is a natural phenomenon. That it produces radio wave that could be detected is perhaps news, but that fact it, it is STILL a natural phenomenon. I.e.if we were not there, if this was still dinosaur age, if it was before life even evolved, there would still be this radio wave thing, so it tells nothing to an eventual alien that we're here, only that there is a planet there. And there are planets aplenty in the galaxy. As for alien, even if there are likely to exist, they are likely to be so far away we may never have a chance to contact them in this millennium.
2016-05-17 04:27:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel and I have the same issue with eye contact. I have to make a real effort and tell myself I am displaying strength and self confidence while I'm doing it. I make myself do it anyway because of perceived social cues in this culture.
2007-08-07 23:51:42 · answer #7 · answered by gypz9 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is polite eye contact and there is non-polite eye contact.
It is polite to make eye contact with a person. It is also polite to look away occasionally while talking to that person, not just stare into their eyes continually. A brief second of looking away and then back is considered polite and good conversation etiquette.
Staring is rude.
2007-08-08 06:11:58 · answer #8 · answered by Wrong number 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i don't think you are insane...i have met people that believe this before...i am one of the eye contact people...but with the job i do...i need to be...i am not trying to steal from people only letting them know i am not lying to them or trying to cheat them in some way...it doesn't bother me when people are not like that and when i realize this is what is going on i try to respect them...
2007-08-07 23:57:51 · answer #9 · answered by Daisy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, is the way you feel, and if you think you right, hey just keep on doing it, eye contact to me is very powerful, but I only use it in a romantic way.
2007-08-07 23:41:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋