How do you start a conversation with your kids about what you really did in the 60's?

Question

So, lie like hell to your kids? That'll really build respect for elders and family closeness.

I have another idea. It's called the truth.

ell them a little hooch and a little acid won't hurt a bit, as long as they don't drive and don't combine it with narcotics or alcohol.

Tell them their schools have lied to them.

Tell them their schools have wasted their precious classroom time, and limited educational funds.

Tell them that you have sat back and allowed these programs to exist.

Tell them that just because you stopped using, you no longer care about unjust prison sentences for possession of small quanities of marijuana.

Tell them your a liar and a hypocrite.

Answer 1

Well, I did 'everything' in the 60s from 'sex' to drugs' and even a lot of 'really good things' like CHARITY work, but I don't 'start a conversation' with my 'kids' about that stuff any more ... they're all grown up, and are having their own kids now ... and they've 'heard it all' when they were kids themselves ... and ALL four of my kids are SUCESSFUL because I 'raised them properly' and taught them how to 'engage their imaginations' (I home schooled all four for most of their lives, and they all had to be put in the 'advanced gifted' programs because they were 'way too well educated' to be put with their 'age peers') ... and HONESTY was also part of that 'teaching.'

Answer 2

I assume you mean drugs, and promiscuity and the like?

I think you have to be honest. You may want to insist on the fact some of these things are mistakes and you wish they didn't do them. But I think if you keep the lines of communications open with your child, they're much less likely to go off the deep end.
There's also the issue that a lot of synthetic drugs that exist today simply weren't around back then, and that these can quickly wreak havoc in a person's life. Worse than even cocaine, there is stuff like crack and metamphetamines.
I guess a concern a lot of parents have is they may be worried their own past can be interpreted by their child as a permission. The truth of the matter is there is nothing you can do to 100 % guarantee your child won't get in a bad situation. But in my view, openness and honesty are the best policy regardless. If the child feels they can confide in you, they're much less likely to shut you off and may take your advice much more seriously.

My parents raised me in the old school, the shut up and do as I say because I am the parent and I don't have to explain anything to you school. If anything, that lead me to more experimentation, and more dangerous play with boundaries. I struggled with addiction for about a decade in my life. So my advice to you is be there as family for your child no matter what. And also, I don't think you can fake openness. You're either open and honest with your child or you're not. Of course, there is the issue of age-appropriateness, but making that judgement call is not the same as shutting out your child psychologically.

Answer 3

Uh... dunno. My parents were always honest with us, although they're a bit old-school.

I asked my father if he ever did drugs. He said that he'd tried speed once in college; he didn't like it because it made him sleepy afterwards.

He also admitted that he got drunk too many times and partied too much.
Nowadays, he still drinks sometimes, but he has far better control and hasn't gotten drunk since he was in his early 20s.

He also believes that marijuana should be legalized, although he thinks anyone who wants to smoke pot or do other drugs is an idiot.

When he told me about this stuff, it was just matter-of-fact. Yeah, he made mistakes, but... the past is the past. It has no effect on us now.

Answer 4

Do they really truly need to know? There are things which you just shouldn't go into detail about. If you think it's best, give them a slightly edited version. For example, tell about your adventures protesting but leave out the bit about your acid trips.

Answer 5

Roll a doober, put on some Doobie Brothers, and talk of many things, of cabbages and kings. Of Byrds and Beatles and Mamas and Papas. Of Donovan in a dreamy kind of tripped out way. Of Ten Years After.

Answer 6

Just speak the truth but in an objective way.

Answer 7

in 68 and 69 we used to go over to the canyons where the hippies lived and watch the cops beat them outta there, they were squaters and made a mess in the canyon, we loved to watch the naked women running down the path boobs flying,, yep those were the days alright,,now i am a retired marine,, the fun never ends

Answer 8

When my kids got older they saw some old pictures of my wife and me in the sixties!!! I just told them the truth.

Answer 9

You shouldn't lie to them, but you don't have to give them every detail either.
Just make sure they understand that you were exploring a lot of ideas and options, and that you made your mistakes and learned from them.
Kids know when you are B.S.ing them, so don't do that, but baring it all isn't necessary either.

Answer 10

In all due respect, why would you want to in the first place. They don't need to know the details of your life. "Let it be" unless they bring it up. Then reveal only what you wish to reveal.