Should I forgive my wife?

Question

My wife and I have been married for a short time and during that time, we had so much stress with financial stuff that I might have said something to upset her. There were also lack of affection between us. One day I cam back from business trip, she said she wanted to take time off and be alone. I was hurt but said Ok. Recently I found on her phone text messaging that she been exchanging with one of my very good friend. This guy is a truly gentleman in the eyes of many girls. In the text they said they miss each other and my wife use the "love" word in there. I confront my wife but she said she pick him to purposely hurt me for what I've said to her during our arguments. She also does that to prove that she still can get men fall for her. She said nothing physical happen between them though she really like the way he treats women. She said she still love me and ask me to forget. She said she still love me. Should I forget and work on our marriae

Answer 1

I don't know whether you should work on your marriage or give it up, that's for only you to decide. I do know that a marriage is not something you play games with just because someone was "mean" to you. She is an adult, a married woman, and it sounds like she has a lot of growing up to do if she's playing stupid games like that. Fooling with people's emotions the way she's doing is dangerous and completely cold-hearted.

Answer 2

It may be she something said in an argument really struck a nerve. Have you ever said negative things about her appearance, her figure etc? I can see some women going looking for affection and a prince, if the man at home is stingy with whatever she may had hoped for in the marriage. Damn, I think about it, but haven't cheated. I say she probably still loves you, and picked this guy because she thought he might be safe. Women usually don't have to look far for a guy for a one-nighter etc. If she can't get her own man's attention, affection, devotion, emotional protection "She/he can't talk to you that way/treat you that way!", or admiration etc.., then she begins to wonder why she tied herself to him. No woman wants a lifetime of disappointment.
It's early in your marriage. Forgive her. Turn the tide.

Answer 3

Im sorry but im the kind of guy that believes that things like this arent just coincidence, the guys a snake in the grass, he's not a friend, hes pondscum. And for her to show you she can still get men lol shes a bigger immature joke. a real woman wouldnt do this no matter how bad you fought or called her names. funny how women always think the grass is greener and she "likes the way he treats women " lol how does she know what goes on behind closed doors? I think you have a very immature woman on your hands, text messaging is for children. I do believe the part where she picked him to mess with you, this is a scolded woman who knew how to get to you. My opinion my man is that you have a phony friend, and a very immature wife. Even if you forgive, will you forget? every time you see him wont you wonder? maybe these two idiots are meant for each other. there's thousands of mature women out there man. Best of luck but I think i smell 2 rats. I don't trust many women, never did other than my mom. : )

Answer 4

It sounds like you two have some work to do. Obviously this whole marriage thing is a new job that just needs some maintenance. You both need to sit down and have a talk about what is lacking in your relationship. Your wife sounded pretty immature for flirting with another man just to prove a pointless point. It would be immature of you to simply let that go. I think you guys should try marriage counseling (if things start getting worse) because you're new to marriage and with help, you can keep it.

Answer 5

What kind of wife you got. Me and my husband argues but I never ever thought of doing something like that. Anyways you can ask her again. Don't ask your friend because it will make you insecure. May be the thing that you said hurt her really bad. But Stay alert on her activities. Give more time to her. Go on dates with her every week. Take a vacation. If you really loves her and wants to save your marriage. If she says she loves you then she does loves you. give her a chance. If you have kids then think about your kids future. If she still in contact with him after all the attention that you are giving her. then you better get into counseling.

Answer 6

Well, if you can't prove infidelity, you may want to go to counseling and work on your marriage. However, if you do truly believe that she has been unfaithful, you need to stop where you are and rethink your whole marriage. If she has been unfaithful once, she can do it again. Nowadays men aren't the only dogs. One other note: if you do stay with her, you need to forgive her completely and NEVER, EVER mention it again, not even in the heat of an argument. Bringing it up again makes you a liar about the forgiveness.

Answer 7

I would guess that you are in your mid twenties or earlier, right? this is what is called a game. the sooner you learn how not to play games in your marriage the better off both of you will be. Any married woman flirting or trying to make her husband jeoulous is very immature (im going easy here cause you attract more with honey and all that). dont forget about these issues, work on yourself first, then your marriage. good luck my friend.

Answer 8

After 7 years my wife did have a physical relationship with a coworker. We were going through similar hard time too. We talked a lot about what happened and because I love her sooo much we stayed together. I can trust her now and we have still been happy together...23 years now.
Talk it out and decide if she is still the only one you love and want to be with.

Answer 9

To ask you to "just forget it" is unreasonable. You can't.
If you two don't work through what happened, why, and what are you both going to do to fix the situation, then you will never feel secure, and she won't ever understand the extent of what happened. Without fixing the problem there is no way either of you can be sure that it wouldn't occur again.
Trust can be re-built, but it takes work from both parties involved.

Answer 10

honestly each and every now and then cheating is a blessing in hide. It alerts you to the actuality that there are severe communique issues interior the relationship. the guy who cheats many times harbors distinctive guilt with reference to the act of cheating, so giving your spouse a very stressful time will in simple terms make her close down finally and stop. the guy cheated on is many times bewildered, taken aback, offended etc. so which you the two have emotions which could be stated in an open, compassionate way. i think of in case you ought to settle for that a distance got here approximately interior the relationship, and you became like the proverbial "ships that exceeded interior the evening" then you extremely've a gamble considering you're the two admitting that each and every contributed to the gap. look, the only reason absolutely everyone cheats is by technique of how the different individual makes them experience...they extremely want the magic they felt with their husband or spouse initially. it is an danger to reinvent your relationship...yet get information interior the technique with a pair therapist. Why not? Infuse new existence into the marriage by using doing resourceful issues. that's approximately giving and receiving on the two your factors. concentration on the affection, and with which will come forgiveness. you're able to like it to artwork for you and your spouse, not your little ones. no you're able to stay in a marriage for the youngsters....they might experience your loneliness and melancholy. in simple terms stay considering you adore your spouse nonetheless and choose to grant it a bypass...yet you're able to take part completely and forgiveness could be there for this to artwork...reliable success!