I have a relative that is 30 years old, her career is finally going in the right direction, she has two young boys and has recently divorced. The problem is, she had a one night stand with someone that was a casual friend and now she's pregnant. She is talking about an abortion and wants my advice. Now she knows that I am a christian and Pro Life. I don't want to come across like I'm judging her. I love her and really feel for her situation. She realizes she made a huge mistake even before she found out she was pregnant. There is absolutely no possibility that she and the father would be together. (Two wrongs don't make a right.) What do I tell her that would help her but also keep my convictions?
2007-08-07 10:53:46 · 18 answers · asked by Sunny64 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Surely your friend knows your feelings, but whatever your feelings are, you cannot make her choice for her. Tell her you love her and will no matter what, but don't assume you can tell her what she should do. Knowing that she has love and support from her friends no matter what her choice might be could be a deciding factor in what choice she makes, and thats the most you can offer.
I do not think that this is going against your convictions. Jesus taught us to love one another as he has loved us, not to try to control or convince others. God gave us all free will, after all, and only He can take it away.
2007-08-07 11:16:05 · answer #1 · answered by kittiesandsparklelythings 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to stay out of it. Before you have an abortion she can have counselling if she wants so she knows the right thing to do. She needs an unbiased point of view and if your so against it you wont provide that. People can go on and on about pro life and whatever else but until you've walked a mile in a mans shoes you should never judge him. Everyone is different and deserves to be treated that way. You seem like a nice caring person to me, if she has the abortion you can be there for her afterwards. She has her boys to think about too which will be the top of her priority list.
2007-08-07 18:56:35 · answer #2 · answered by thebippy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
let her know that god's blessed her for a third time whether it was planned or not. even though the father will not be there for her, there are still things out there that help single mothers, like WIC, and F.I.A. food stamps, medicaid. Just because she's pregnant doesn't mean she has to give up on her career either, but I would make sure she let her boss know in atleast 2 weeks or so. this way they know why she's calling in sick or needs to run to the bathroom. I'm also a christian and do not believe in abortion for any reason. I will pray that she makes a wise decision. and I pray that the right words will flow from your mouth to encourage her to carry the baby full term. Good Luck!
2007-08-07 18:10:55 · answer #3 · answered by Ashley. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
An abortion is better. Some religious people don't think a baby has a soul until it draws breath. Unborn babes are not as important as "already here" humans in the Bible. Some people don't consider a baby as "viable" (able to live on its own) until a certain age - so it would die if it miscarried now, anyway.
Think of it this way: The day we can transplant a baby from one woman's womb to another with no ill affects, we don't need abortion any more.
2007-08-09 01:56:10 · answer #4 · answered by Tina Goody-Two-Shoes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think that YOU need to "re-charge" your relationship with the Lord. I am sure that you know what the bible says, and you should have no hesitation about standing up for your God. He comes before anyone else.
I know that you want to be a kind friend, but the kindest thing you can do right now is to stand firm in your beliefs. Use this oppurtunity to direct her to the Lord. He is the one who created this life and He is the one who can and will help her, if she accepts it. You need to explain to her what the bible says about life. I wouldn't rub her face in the fact that the Lord condemns abortion, but I would really emphasize that the Lord is the one who can "bail her out" of this situation.
Be strong in the Lord! Use every oppurtunity you can to glorify Him. You are in the perfect situation to do this. Be BOLD!
2007-08-07 18:16:25 · answer #5 · answered by Claire R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Abortion should never be an option in my opinion. There is a little life who deserves a chance! I understand your situation. You don't want to sound too firm on your viewpoint to push her the other direction, but you also don't want to be too lax either. Ask her this " Are you glad your alive?" then wait for her response..say " Don't you think that your baby should have the same right to live as your mother gave you?" You also want to add that this decision will effect her for the rest of her life! I know a few people who have chosen to abort and they regret it every day! You need to be able to be there and stand by her as a friend no matter what her choice, but please, please tell her that the baby deserves a chance!
2007-08-07 18:18:00 · answer #6 · answered by la la 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to ask her if she could live the rest of her life knowing the decision she made to kill her own baby. Could she really look at the two boys she has and want to get rid of the child living inside of her? You can't make her make the right decision but you can help her think about what she would have to regret for the rest of her life.
2007-08-07 17:59:07 · answer #7 · answered by Preggo26 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
If she knows you are pro life, I think she really wants your encouragement to keep the baby. You can still sympathize with her situation while sticking to your beliefs. Offer to go shopping for baby clothes, throw a shower, etc. if she wants. Just let her know that if she does decide to abort you will understand her reasons, even if you don't agree.
2007-08-07 18:01:16 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah N 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I dont think she should put you in the position to even ask you about what to do, because its such a devasting situation...as a christian what you should do is stand by what jesus would do...convince her to keep that baby and give the baby up for adoption...or maybe a relative...there are so many other options...if she choose to do the abortion anyways, thats really not something for you to worry about, because you tried your BEST to give her other alternantives...pray for her and that baby...god hears and sees all...the answers will come..>DONT WORRY
2007-08-07 18:01:30 · answer #9 · answered by Susana P 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Tell her God will not give anything to her that she can't handle because that is the absolute truth. I am a PRO LIFE and Christian also. The grief she will go through from having an abortion will be far greater than anything she will deal with having a baby and being a single mom.
2007-08-07 17:57:47 · answer #10 · answered by kella l 3 · 2⤊ 3⤋