Breastfeeding question....?

Question

I'm 33 weeks along and I am debating on breastfeeding. I really want to because its so much healthier for the baby but my husband has his own concerns. He's worried that my boobs are going to change and that they won't ever look the same again. He also fears that because of that he "won't be attracted to me." I was just wondering if anyone has had this problem before, how you handled it, and do your boobs look normal after you stop breastfeeding?

Answer 1

Absolutely BREASTFEED your baby! Your husband should be a little more concerned about your child's health and your health than about appearance. Seriously, what is more important here? My husband totally encouraged me and thought I was sexier because he saw me as an intelligent woman - being the best mother to his child that I could be! He also enjoyed my larger breasts while I was nursing! (I think anytime you go through pregnancy, you're never going to be exactly the same as you were before you have a baby anyway! Ridiculous and unrealistic thinking!) I have nursed 4 babies and I am only slightly (half a cup size) smaller than I was before I was a mom. I am happy with my body - I weigh 115 lbs and I was 110 when I was married. I'm 36. My oldest is 16 and my youngest is 9 1/2. I look great! He tells me so all the time, "Hot" as he calls me! Your husband is expressing fears and they are not rational! Of course you're not going to look the same, but the pregnancy weight will come off a whole lot faster if you nurse than if you don't. I gained 30-35 lbs with each of my kids and it all came right off within 2 mos every single time!
Breastfeeding is So Good for your baby too - breastfeed exclusively for no less than 6 mos. Babies don't need anything else for the first 6 mos! This is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics! Babies get nutrients and immunity from breastmilk that cannot be duplicated in any formula. Their IQ will be higher, they are less prone to ear infections and other illnesses too! What is better? Looking "normal" or "attractive" or do you prefer running your baby up to the ER at 1 am because he/she is screaming with an ear infection - every other month? Come on! My 4 kids were hardly ever sick when they were infants! I breastfed each of them for at least 8 mos!
Then there is the added protection for you! Did you know that if a mom in her twenties breastfeeds her 1st baby for 6 mos to 12 mos, HER CHANCE OF EVER GETTING BREAST CANCER is SIGNIFICANTLY LOWERED? Maybe by as much as 50%? It's what God meant your body to do! It's a no-brainer! PLUS lets not forget how much it helps with your bonding with the new baby! There were times in the middle of the night that sure, I didn't feel like nursing, but hey! It was a whole lot easier than making a bottle at 3 am!
Diapers won't smell as bad as a formula fed baby's either!
I can't think of any negatives with breast feeding - just educate yourself and get help if you need it when you're starting. Cracked nipples are preventable - it's all about how the baby latches on. That was the only problem I ever had and it was with #4 - I was thinking, "I'm a pro at this" and I wasn't paying attention. Well, it took 2 weeks to heal up, but we got through it.
Your breasts aren't going to look the same either way, but it's not as if nursing is going to "deflate" you! You might end up a little smaller, but you're not damaged - if anything you'll be healthier and isn't that what is most important here? Remind your husband he didn't marry a barbie doll - you're a real woman and if he's a real man, he will encourage you to do the best thing for both you and his child, because he loves you. Watch and see - most dads I know think breastfeeding is awesome - if not sexy. Have your doctor tell your husband his/her opinion too if that helps.
Best Wishes!

Answer 2

Breastfeeding doesn't change your boobs...it's the whole pregnancy thing that does. And if your husband is that shallow, I'd choose my baby's health over him any day! I breastfeed for less than a month then stopped because my nipples were cracked and bleeding. In less than two weeks I went back to breastfeeding because I missed being so close to my baby again. It's hard work, but I think worth it. My breasts are softer than before, and a little less perky, but they're not disgusting. My husband doesn't even say anything about them ...except the one time he dared to say "Gee, I thought your boobs would be bigger."

Answer 3

You whole body changes during pregnancy. I breastfed my older child and am breastfeeding our youngest now. Your BODY isn't the same after pregnancy- is he aware of this fact??? Better let him know now- working out helps, but there are things that are never the same. I think it is rather superficial for him to ask such a thing given that as we age, we change- unless he plans to front the money for a little plastic surgery.

That said, I wouldn't think twice about breastfeeding. Our 1 year old has only been sick one time in a year. She has never had an ear infection. She is always happy, healthy and advanced.

Likewise, it's easy. No bottles to warm, no formula to make.
Your milk is always ready and perfect.

I recommend the site: www.askdrsears.com
Also- The Breastfeeding Book by Sears. It is user friendly and an easy read. It also lays flat as you search for information.

You could also look at www.kellymom.com

and

www.lalecheleague.org

Good luck to you- you have some time to do your research and get yourself ready to nurse.

You also should go braless to prepare your nipples ready for nursing.

I have nursed 2 and seriously haven't noticed much of a change. My husband says since the birh of our children, he loves my body more- it's filled out a bit and looks womanly. I was on the really thin side previous to pregnancy. Now, I am 130 and 5'5".

Good luck to you!!!

Answer 4

I think your husband needs to grow up and realize that breastfeeding is more healthy for the baby than formula. Your breast change due to pregnancy. I can't believe that he thinks that he won't be attracted to you because of breastfeeding, that is really ridiculous. I am currently breastfeeding my almost 16 month old daughter and my husband is not worried about not being attracted to me. Like I said before, your husband needs to stop acting so immature and realize that breastfeeding your baby is going to give your baby a good start in life. Good luck!

Answer 5

Wow, if you're husband is that ridiculous about how you look from breastfeeding..... just wow. Does he know your body is going to change too....?! Geez.

I seriously would breastfeed, is your baby's overall health more important than the shallowness of your husband? Of course they're going to sag a little more when your done breastfeeding, but look at all the good you just did for that sweet little baby.

Maybe you two should consider some couples counseling because I'm not quite sure I could or would handle a guy telling me not to do something because he might not be attracted to me anymore, he should love you for who you are, NOT only what you look like.

Answer 6

Breastfeeding or not... your boobs will look different after pregnancy. Your milk comes in anyway, if not nursing then you have to deal w/ engorgement because you're not letting it out. Most women's bodies won't ever look the same again. Even if you're the most fit woman in the world, you might get stretch marks, your skin may not regain it's elasticity and other parts may not fall back into place.

And as far as the attraction. That sound silly and superficial. Is he going to leave you when you're in your 70's and all wrinkled up, and your breasts are down to your ankles just because of gravity???

I nursed for 18 months total. I'm back in my same bras. I'm not deformed now. My husband says they're squishy now, they lost their firmness. But who cares!! If breastfeeding meant that after I was done, I had to have a mastectomy, ok sign me up.

Answer 7

By all means don't do it in public if it makes you uncomfortable. The women I see breastfeeding in public have a blanket or something draped over them so it's not like you see the baby with your breast in its mouth. That's just the ones I notice, likely walk by far more and don't even realize what they are doing. I don't see it any as any different from giving the baby a bottle. Breasts have just become so sexualized in our society that we tend to freak out over the sight of one in public. Your car is a perfectly good place to breastfeed, just keep the doors locked because while unlikely, there are nuts out there. I don't know if I want want to eat my lunch in the bathroom so it's not my first choice. Do what you are comfortable doing, don't be swayed by others and what they think is right.

Answer 8

Pregnancy changes your breasts regardless. I nursed my last one entirely where as the first 2 were just for a short period of time in the beginning and yes they have changed but I guess my husband still finds them as sexual objects. He was happy to have the last one done finally but never entertained the notion of not doing it. Is he serious or just making jokes? If it were my husband I'd know that he was joking but if he were serious it shows some need for maturity on his part. Does he expect them to look the same when you're 50? Does his body look the same? Seriously talk with him and discuss this as parents not as horny teenagers.

Answer 9

I think it's really shallow that your husband is acting that way. The breasts are not just for him, they are meant to feed your baby. Before pregnancy I was always in a toss up about breastefeeding because I was afraid of the same thing...that they would get saggy. Plus, I was already a size 36D when got pregnant and went up to a 40DD (and I even lost 8 pounds so far after the birth of my son 5 weeks ago). BUT, I chose to breastfeed him and I LOVE IT. I am so glad I didn't end up bottle feeding. In fact too, I like the way my breasts look now more than before I got pregnant.
And on top of all that, you husband needs to be more understanding to the needs of you and your baby. Breast milk is more healthy for your baby and formula is EXPENSIVE! I think you need to have a serious talk with him and ask what his true motives are when he married you. It's not all about looks and vanity.

Answer 10

It is definately worth breastfeeding, it is so much better for a growing child. Your breasts will look different after giving birth, never mind breastfeeding. It does'nt matter what 'they' look like anyway, if you feel good about yourself helping and loving your baby then that's the best answer you need.


And by the way, your husband if being very pathetic, what if he had a 33 week old baby tugging at his nipples?