English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

I don't know how to tell him, I know he still loves me, but I no longer love him. I know it will crush him. I will always care about him. But, I don't love him anymore and it's NOT because I love someone there is no one else involved. I'm just not happy with him any more.

2007-08-07 05:01:13 · 35 answers · asked by Jade N 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

35 answers

I don't buy it...love isn't just a bunch of high school feelings, its a choice. You basically are choosing not to love him. Take a step back, look at the reasons why you loved him to begin with. Really think about what you are saying because once you go down that road there is no going back. Once you tell your husband that you choose not to love him anymore, the hurt is there and is very hard to mend.

2007-08-07 05:04:56 · answer #1 · answered by Moo Moo Mair 6 · 1 3

Did he do you any wrong? Did he hurt you? Did he deceive you? I there any reason but boredom that makes you want to leave him? Does he deserve being left just because you don't feel happy anymore? If not:
Don't crush him. And don't forget that real love is not a feeling, but a decision. Being happy is not the only thing that matters. Relationships are not always comfortable, but if you have a spouse, you have to be reliable. If you say you "will always care about him", just do that! With all your heart, with all your strength. And do your "pursuit of happiness" with, not without him.
Holding on will provide you much more happiness than finding someone new and start another relationship - even if there's nobody else involved now.

2007-08-07 05:15:17 · answer #2 · answered by AniraTak 2 · 0 0

If you are 100% sure that you can no longer be happy with him then the only way to say so is to just say it. It's NOT easy. I've just gone through this and asked for a divorce and she still doesn't want to let it go. She wants to try counseling which we did a couple of years ago. But, my reasons are far different than yours. At least he isn't a complete nut job. So, the best way is to just sit him down and be honest with him. No matter how much it hurts him or you, there would be nothing good for either of you in doing otherwise. I'm sure he doesn't want to spend his life with someone who really doesn't want to be there. He may not see it that way at first but at some point that will get through. I'm sorry about your situation. I hope it all turns out well for you.

2007-08-07 07:20:09 · answer #3 · answered by jwsou812 3 · 0 0

Lady please! Stop lying to yourself and people on this site. You know that you are already cheating on this man and in love with someone else. You're right, telling him that you don't love him will crush him, but you have to do it. There will be much drama, and there is no easy way around this. Just don't get caught cheating before you tell him. That will crush him 10 times worse, and whatever you do don't admit that you have been cheating. Some things are better left unsaid. One thing you can do to lessen the amount of drama....when he keeps on begging, tell him that he looks pitiful doing that, and that when he does it, it makes you care even less for him than you do already. This will shock him, make him reach for his pride, and he will start to get over you quickly, because you are not letting him think that there is still a chance for him to be with you.

2007-08-07 05:08:49 · answer #4 · answered by Shock and Awe 2 · 0 0

Why dont you look at the reasons you have fallen out of love, has the intimacy gone, does he take you for granted, do you not date. Then sit down and tell him theres problems, at least give him the chance to put things right if he can. Marriage is hard, it takes commitment. Maybe your just one of those woman who are in love with love, and when it changes you have the need to move on so that you can feel that giddy first feelings of love again, until it gets old and changes into something deeper, and you move on again. You have to look at you, especially if as you say there is no one else. It takes 2 to keep things new in any relationship.

2007-08-07 05:09:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

There is difference between love and friendship. As I understand, you don't find your feeling as hot as before. But it doesn't mean you don't love him any more. The matter is when a woman is sure she is loved, she calms down, as we always find more attractive and desirable those things that we cannot get. If you really feel uncomfortable being too intimite with him, just tell him you want a little break to think. But still he may become the best friend of yours, so be careful, probably, he'll be satisfied with it. And also probable, you'll realise he is one who will never betray you. It is more important than any feeling, probably with time you'll learn to appriciate it.

2007-08-07 05:23:06 · answer #6 · answered by Ekaterina E 2 · 0 0

Well if you continue to stay with him out of guilt and pitty, you will only end up hurting him more.

-Yes, the truth hurts...but you have to speak it in order for some people to understand where you're coming from and to get your point across. So I mean no matter how nice you are to him when you say it, he's going to be confused, hurt, sad, and maybe a little angry too. There is not a right or wrong way to really go about telling him, because either way his emotions are going to run the same...right?.

.I suppose you could just say something like:

"___(his name) this is never an easy thing to do or say to someone, and you'll end up being upset with me no matter what after I say this. ____(his name) I don't really know how else to express this to you, but lately my feelings for you just have not been as strong as they used to be and I have lost interest in our relationship....(sigh) and I feel it's best if we break it off."

.Then he'll respond.

.And things will work themselves out from there.

.**Good luck**

2007-08-07 05:15:14 · answer #7 · answered by Murphy's Law 5 · 0 0

First off, try marriage counseling. Marriage is not always happy. It is like a roller coaster and a counselor will be able to help you guys pinpoint your reasons for being unhappy and will help you fix it. However, if you are sure that it just can't work, then you need to be honest. You can't stay in this if you are miserable. Honesty is the best. And of course it is going to hurt him. But there is no other way. The best you can do is respect him enough to be up front and honest with him. He will appreciate it more. Good luck honey.

2007-08-07 05:05:48 · answer #8 · answered by mattsbaby125 3 · 0 1

Just be honest with him be fair to him and you. Because the more you wait the more you waist his time and yours. There is no point in being with someone who you don't love anymore. The best way is honesty! Your an adult and he or she is an adult if they don't know how to accept it they're going to have to. Don't be mean about it either, make a day where it's just the both of you and have some time. But don't say something and don't go through with it either. Mean what you say and make sure he or she knows you mean it and that it's really over.

2007-08-07 05:05:48 · answer #9 · answered by Rain 4 · 0 0

It's perfectly healthy to sometimes feel that way in a relationship. You just feel a little tired, the feelings of love are pushed way back into the recesses of your heart but it doesn't mean it's not there. Love is not something that can disappear with the snap of your fingers. Unless you guys have problems that have been festering for a long time. I suggest you search within yourself what you dislike about the relationship and air them out with him.

2007-08-07 05:06:36 · answer #10 · answered by floozy_niki 6 · 0 0

fedest.com, questions and answers