My husband has a friend named Mark. My husband, Mark, and myself have hung out on numerous occaions. All three of us get along very well and are pretty good friends. [I'm a tom-boy, so guy friends are more my cup of tea. And I usually get along with guys better as well. I 4-wheel, fish, hike, watch football, and drink beer, not to many women want to do those things with me, anyway...] Well Mark is always talking about how he just wants him and my husband to go four wheelin sometime, like a guys day or something. I guess it kinda hurts my feelings (that would be the girl in me right there). So my question is... Why must guys do guy ONLY things sometimes? It really frustrates me... and I think it's stupid.
2007-08-07 04:43:45 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Baba Yaga: Just because I haven't many female friends speaks ill of me? How about the fact that I have very few friends at all, male or female. It has everything to do with being a tom-boy. I'm interested in things males are mostly interested in and not interested in things that females are usually interested in. So I tend to hang out with people that do things I'm interested in. Simple math really... I didn't need your psycho babble today, thanks anyway.
2007-08-07 05:02:25 · update #1
Jim Baw: It's Mark that wants the guys day not my husband... he's mature enough and couldn't care less about a guys day out.
2007-08-07 06:21:06 · update #2
It's not stupid but a mental block.We can't change hardened attitudes formed over decades even if we wish to.Then there are social norms which some times take more than a generation to just get modified,leave aside the total change.The answer for you is that guy and guy things shall continue but increased participation by people like you shall help in modifying attitudes .Your kids would face lesser Resistance when they reach your age.
2007-08-07 05:18:07 · answer #1 · answered by brkshandilya 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's just a thing guys typically need. No offense is meant to you, but everyone needs their space and comfort zone. Personally, there are certain activities that I would never invite a girlfriend along for, no matter how serious our relationship was. Just because it's kind of like my escape - my chance to go out with my buddies from high school or college, get excessively drunk and remember the good ol' days, recounting ridiculous stories that undoubtedly a girlfriend would have a million prying questions about later - questions that I would not want to answer haha. It also can allow appropriate time to vent about our girlfriends/wives. Like it or not, everyone complains about relationships, no matter how happy they are in it. Nobody is perfect. There are always small things that drive you nuts. Even if you wouldn't want to change it at all, venting about it or telling funny stories to your friends is a good escape, and it makes you feel more at ease about it. Would I go out with a group of girls to get away? Heck no, because that is just shady, and would cause distrust and questions for obvious reasons. Basically it looks like you're going to have to accept that this is something your husband needs, and you should find females with similar interests to you, and you can have your own excursions.
2007-08-07 05:32:08 · answer #2 · answered by Jim Baw 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Honestly.... Why do girls only want a Girls out Day, Because it is a way of the same gender to bond, it shouldn't be take as an insults to you, and I can understand that it might hurt your feelings, and I really don't think Mark is trying to do so., your husband really loves you and that is obvious due to that he has no problems with you hanging out with his guys friends and letting you be kind of one of the guys, but every now and then it's just nice to have just all guys or all girls, then you don't have to worry about hurting ones feelings, you can let loose and relax to the fullest, with out having to worry about hurting your feelings, there is no restriction, just like there is sometimes i don't want my husband around, I love him dearly and we do about 99% of things together, but sometimes it is nice just to hang out with my girls, laugh, cut jokes, say certain things that when i get home I don't have to explain why I said that. That's all, now if Mark was insisting on everytime, then ya I would let my feelings get hurt, but every now and then in natural and healthy. I hope this help you. Kelly
2007-08-07 05:05:50 · answer #3 · answered by kelly 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not stupid of a guy to want to hang out occasionally with only guys. Yea, you're a tom boy, but that doesn't make you a guy, and sometimes men need to be away from estrogen. Give him a break, let him and his friend have some time to themselves to be guys. No matter how tom boyish you are, you are still a woman, and men aren't always comfortable being men around us tom boys no matter how "like one of the guys" we are.
2007-08-07 06:56:47 · answer #4 · answered by littlevivi 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think each person needs his or her own friends, separated from their spouses. It's only normal to want to be able to talk about the things they've shared, the things only they like, and probably talk about their significant others. A lot of people are not comfirtable talking about their significant other when said people are present. You two should not be joined at the hip 24/7 after all.
2007-08-07 05:55:45 · answer #5 · answered by M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds more likely that your are jealous of your husband's friendship with Mark and that you wish you had such a friendship. It is possible for you to find such a thing on your own even though you insist that it is not. You are not the only woman in the world who enjoys your hobbies. You know where to seek them out, so do it! Make friends with someone other than Mark and your husband and get out there and have fun, you owe it to yourself.
2007-08-07 06:30:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
My husband is in his early 50's, and I joke about his "male bonding sessions". There are times when he takes off and enjoys spending time with the guys without me. I take this time and do whatever it is I want to do. I don't mind being alone, or spending time with the girls. Sometimes I even look forward to it! I don't know how your husband's friends are, but our circle of friends watch their language around the girls, and behave respectfully (for the most part) around us. I can only assume they don't have to monitor their conversations when it's just the guys.
2007-08-07 08:55:53 · answer #7 · answered by Maggie Mae 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because they do. So do we. It's not stupid. If it makes him happy to hang with his buds, let him be and you go find something else to do.
Sorry, but the fact that you have few or no female friends doesn't speak well for you. Do other women threaten you? Bore you? Being a tomboy has nothing to do with it. Besides, you're an adult now, and the world holds more than it did when you were 12. Discover that, and let your hub and Mark have their time together.
2007-08-07 04:55:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Wow, thrilling. properly, my uncle earns twenty seven thousand RM a month, so such adult men earning such quantity do exist, hangpa yang tak pandai cari. uncommon species lah, yet have been given, and it extremely is despite in case you're stable sufficient to get a guy like that. Hahahaha. in case you will question me, i could choose my spouse to stay at residing house, cook dinner, and look after my babies lah, that still if she is of an identical opinion. despite the fact that it may be stupid to restrain her from working if she needs to, or if my earnings isn't sufficient. And please do no longer portray adult men as inhumane creatures, "adult men drowsing after coming residing house,or going out for clubbing", those are actually not adult men lah, those are animals lah. My cousin's spouse wakes up at 4 a.m. and he or she'll cook dinner lunch for her babies earlier she is going to artwork. while she comes back from artwork around six thirty p.m., she'll additionally cook dinner for the kin. Even i'm amused by potential of that. yet such human beings are problematic to discover. it extremely is not a foul element nonetheless, me myself i do no longer assume my spouse to cook dinner after a hectic day at artwork, loopy ah? despite the fact that it extremely is not something beside the point if she herself needs to cook dinner after artwork, no longer even in this so stated as cutting-edge century.
2016-10-14 07:21:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
because a guy can't truly be a guy with a woman tagging along. TRUTH.
2007-08-07 04:47:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋