31 weeks pregnant and have seen my bestfriend twice?

Question

Im alittle sad/confused. I have been bestfriends with my friend for about 6 years now. We used to hang out..party..talk on the phone do everything together. I am pregnant and since my 2nd month of pregnancy she has not been around. I seen her once when I was 2months preg then I seen her again when I was 6 months preg and im going on 8 months preg. I have called for her to come over and talk since I have been really sick she does not come..I moved to a new home she was suppose to help me move since im really big and cant move much she came for an hour and left and now my baby shower is coming up and she has told me someone has given her a carseat and stroller and she is going to give it to me..Im alittle upset ..im sad..I dont understand she wants to be the god mother of my child..but she has seen me twice during my whole pregnancy. She brings me used things for my baby and she could not help me move and does not talk much to me much..am i overreacting ..any advise what you think?

thank you everyone for your advise..I will just clam down..and just enjoy the time I do see her and spend with her...

Answer 1

Hmm, well, could it be that you are not much fun to be around because of the pregnancy hormones?

I have been pregnant four times, and I know that almost everybody I knew stopped calling/visiting me. It was because I was so hormonal and sick... which meant that I did not have a lot of energry and my personaility wasn't as "perky"... so people choose to just let me be. Once the baby was born, everything went back to normal.

Could she be jealous that you're pregnant?

The best thing to do is to straight out ask her "what has changed in our relationship? I'd would really prefer you tell me, rather than me keep guessing."

I'm going with hormones. If somebody video-taped us women while we are pregnant,then showed the movie to us after we had the baby.... we would be horrified at how we acted. But it's the hormones fault, and we can't control it. :O)

Answer 2

It could be that she is jealous... maybe she wanted to have a baby too, or is thinking that her time will never come. Or it could be that she doesn't know how to act around you when you are pregnant... i.e. you guys can't do the things you used to do before you were pregnant.

Keep in mind that you being pregnant has changed things for her too, meaning it is probably just hard on her. Try not to get discouraged... hopefully once baby comes she will soon see that you are the same old person and that you two can still laugh, talk and have a good time together.

All the best to you and baby:) !

Answer 3

Do you talk to regularly on the phone? I know with my best friend, I dont see her as much now that I am pregnant. But I realize that it is because of the change in me - I am not going out and doing many of the things that I used to do so that significantly reduced our time together. But we still talk everyday. Honestly, gently used things are not that bad if a) you know where they came from and b) your friend cant afford new things. You should talk to her and tell her how you feel.

I have also found that my friends that do not have children act a little strange. I want to talk about the baby and they feel like they cant relate. Your friendships can change.

Answer 4

Just chill out. You guys will always be friends, but you're lives are different now.

youre having a child, your life wont be the same after this. Hers is.

When i was pregnant my best friend was sooo jealous she was mean and hateful and never called and always judged me whenever she did come over. I was really hurt for a long time. Until i realized she was just in a different place in her life, and jealous that i was married and pregnant.

we're still close friends, and get along much better, but i realize and she's does too, that our lives are not the ones we had before, we dont have everything in common. I have a son and a family to raise, she has her job and her friends.

Answer 5

I am 7 months pregnant and I just saw my best friend last Friday for the first time since I announced that I was preg.--she hasn't come to see me either. I think things just get busy and life gets away from you. I ended up going to see her on her lunch break on Friday. Just suprise her and drop by on your way grocery shopping or something like that. She still cares about you so don't be sad...things will go back to normal after baby is born. =)

Answer 6

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Answer 7

It can be very frustrating for a friend who isn't pregnant or doesn't have children yet to spend all her time with her best friend talking about her childbearing adventures. My best friend had her first child last November and we really haven't talked since my wedding a year ago. She is so wrapped up in baby stuff that we just can't talk anymore. Eventually, we will be in a similar place in our lives and reconnect, but for now, we just keep praying for each other.

Answer 8

I am having the same exact problem!!! When we make plans, she blows me off and tells me that she just can't tear herself away from her bf.
I cried about it and after I mopped myself up I thought, Why should I get myself all worked up. I am giving birth to my new best friend anyways...and when I do have my baby and she finally breaks away from her bf long enough to visit, I'll just make sure I have something else to do. She has to know how much she is hurting my feelings, I almost broke down in tears the last time she cancelled!
It's not that I don't love her anymore but I can't just be friends on her terms. So don't get too upset about it. That's all you can do other than stop trying, right?

Answer 9

This kind of happerned to me, once I got married I saw less of my best mate, then once I had my daughter, again I saw even less of her. Im expecting again, and I cant be botherd to tell her. I think this is what happern when we grow up, we drift apart. No you are not over reacting. When you have your baby you will make new friends, my very good freind I met in Mothercare and we see each other once a week. Personlly I think my friend finds me boring as I do like to talk about my daughter.

Answer 10

Does she have children of her own? Does she want children?

I found when I had my daughter that pretty much everyone I knew didn't want anything to do with me becuase I was going to be tied down with a child or they were jelous because they wanted one and couldn't have one.

Best thing I would do is ask why she hasn't been around. She must have a reason. Best to get it on the table. Especially if she is going to be resentful towards you and she wants to be the "godmother".