How do you know if it's a real love? Do you think the duration of relationship matter?

Question

I met a special man 3 months ago, and it just hit me that he is the one. Everyone around me says 3 months is nothing etc.

Do you believe that the duration determins the quality of love?

Answer 1

no, when i met my partner it was love at first sight. I moved in with him practically 3 months later and am still with him. I had the same.. its to soon.. you don't really no him.. but we women have good insticts. No one can tell us how we feel for another.
All the best x

Answer 2

You may get those who will say love at first sight and in some cases, this is true. However just because you think that it is love at first sight, doesn't make it true. Only time can prove that. Duration spent with somebody before marriage is always helpful regardless of what anyone will tell you. Reason being is that there are many traits that remain hidden by all of us human beings that only tend to show themselves after an extended time with the same person. Now thinking that the relationship is "first sight love" and rushing into a marriage is sometimes greatly disappointing as these traits begin to show themselves. Case in point: Lets say that you meet a guy that spends allot of money on you while you are dating and you love every minute of it. Never thinking that after your married, the reason that he spent all of that money is because he is very bad with finances. This could cause severe problems in the relationship. Lets say that the girl that a guy was dating always smelled very nice when on a date. Then after getting married, the guy finds out that she dumps the perfume on to cover the fact that she doesn't shower regularly. (I knew of a marriage like this) These are just rough scenarios intended to let you know the true possibility's. When in fact there are many, many more that could arise. Take your time, enjoy his company and learn all about your mate before jumping. Just my opinion.

Answer 3

This is a highly controversial issue. I mean, it's a matter of personal values, beliefs and opinions.

From my personal experience, duration does matter to some point. It matters because the more time you spend with a specific person, you get to know them better, you can see how they act in various situations, you simply get to know who they really are with time.

Real Love doesn't have a definition. You can't define real love, because it's a feeling, an emotion which is not judged and percepted in the same way by everybody.

If deep down in your heart, you feel like you love this man, than it's definitely love you're feeling. I'd suggest you don't listen to anybody when it comes to matters of the heart. Because no one can know what you're feeling inside, better than you can. That's why, it's all up to you...

Just remember one thing... "Love doesn't start or end in a day"

Answer 4

The John Tesh radio show quoted from some thing that states chemically, we are attracted and "in love" for 12-15 months. After that, the "honeymoon is over" and then its compromise, and communication. If you can do those two things effectively after 1 1/2 - 2 years and beyond, you are doing better than most. The urge to want to may be the "real love" that you ask.

Answer 5

It takes a lot longer than 3 months to know somebody's character & attitude. They can be on their best behavior for 3 months if they are trying, but they may lack the self-control to maintain that behavior over the long haul.

It all comes down to character and attitude, and if you can't be patient enough to wait to find out, then you have self-control problems yourself.

Answer 6

Three months is enough time to generally get to know someone, love grows and changes over time so watch out. ;) Go with your gut! =]

But hold on a bit, he might not be so ready to jump into serious, serious stuff. It takes a lot more time for some people to realize certain things than it does for others.

Good luck, I wish you the best. :]

Answer 7

I think that time and experience determine if it's serious or not. I don't think that it depends on the duration of the relationship, however I think you should not be in a hurry.

Answer 8

Time means nothing. I knew my ex. for 6 years as a friend before we started dating. I lived with him for 5 years before we got married, we were married for 10 years before he left . We started out as friends until it progressed to more, I thought I knew everything about him, but obviously not. So you can be with someone for years and still not really know him. So go for it, there are no guarantees regardless how long you know each other.
Good luck

Answer 9

although it is possible you are onto a winner - dont leap into anything - give it a year or so before being sure that he feels the same way and that it isnt a hormone rush

Answer 10

duration matters cause it gives you chance to explore more about his true feelings towards you