My ex has been much nicer to me as of late. I have been told by other divorced people that they now get along with their ex's. One reason we got divorced is that my ex said she did not love me. We went to counseling and tried hard to stay together but it did not work. My question is if all these people say they now get along with their ex and my ex is now trying to be nice to me then why did all these people(including myself) try to be nice to each other all the time? Then maybe there would not be so many divorces in the first place!
2007-08-07 00:56:24 · 8 answers · asked by paco 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she's being nice because there are no more feelings mixed up in the whole mess and because you have kids together.....if there were no kids you probably wouldn't be talking at all.
2007-08-07 01:06:22 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because you love someone doesn't mean you can live with them. When two people marry, there are a lot of decision to be made and if there is no compromise in these situations it usually leads to divorce. That's the reason for a lot of couples living together. It gives them time to find out if they can get along in every aspect of a marriage before signing the papers. It isn't necessarily the right thing to do cause a lot decide they don't need the papers to be happy. But once you divorce someone you are off the hook and can relax with the other person and still remain friends. It takes the stress factor out of the equation.
2007-08-07 01:26:07 · answer #2 · answered by Needtoknow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being nice isn't something we all have inside of us. Some people are nice by nature, others are not but you need to ask yourself why all of a sudden, why not when you were together. To me its very simple, I have never been married before but I know for a fact that its not a walk in the park just like all the other aspects of our lives. You should also know that being nice does not necessarily mean that divorces wont happen...like you said your ex said she didn't love you...my ex said the same thing to me.....without love, there is nothing.....
2007-08-07 01:17:11 · answer #3 · answered by Cplex 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the case of my divorce, my ex spent a LOT of time hating me.... but our divorce took almost two full years to finish. That's a lot of time to hate............ so after awhile she realized that no one can carry on hate for that long unless they are completely crazy... and my ex is only half crazy!
Seriously, I think that once the divorce is done....... and both parties begin to recover mentally, physically, and financially they begin to relax around each other again. Besides, usually people hold on to good memories....... so the bad ones can start to fade. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if your ex has stronger feelings for you now that you are divorced than he did at the end of your marriage.
2007-08-07 01:07:30 · answer #4 · answered by Aron1968_30 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being nice to someone has nothing to do with loving someone. Perhaps she thought better of her behavior and decided to be a role model for your kids, or maybe she's just a happier person now that she isn't in a relationship with you. Either way, if what you are really asking here is "is there a chance she still loves me", then only she can ask that question. You, on the other hand, need to move on and be happy that things are smoothing out. My ex and I always got along because we had children who depended on us and our fight was not their fight.
2007-08-07 01:06:45 · answer #5 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Stupidity and insanity. There are a lot of people out there walking around, and they go to work, and they pay their taxes, and they may even vote, but... they are dysfunctional nuts in relationships.
Half the folks out there are totally clueless, and most of the rest are a bit confused. The folks who answer this question of yours will prove that.
2007-08-07 01:05:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't make this more than it is. Your wife did not love you. That is why you are divorced, and why she can be nice to you now. She no longer has to live a lie.
2007-08-07 01:15:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Because it takes a LOT more than being nice to keep or save a marriage.
2007-08-07 01:01:34 · answer #8 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋