I have this magical gnome that lives in my basement. He keeps threatening to burn my house down. Other times he pees in my shoes, just to be an a**hole. I have asked him to leave a few times, but the jerk won't go. He won't even split the utility bill. Anybody out there know how to kill a gnome? Or at least make him leave my house????
2007-08-06 16:14:33 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Home & Garden ➔ Other - Home & Garden
I already tried sending him to rehab. I told him he has a drinking problem and the little b**stard hit me.
2007-08-06 16:22:03 · update #1
I offer my back-yard as a foster-home for your gnome.
I have never turned a gnome away yet.
Tell the gnome to expect company. He will have to adjust to the idea of a water feature, raspberry bushes, birds, butterflies, some sneaky moths, and various creepy-crawlies.
He is not to bother my vegetable beds, but he can pick as much rhubarb as he likes, and of course, he may sniff my flowers at will. And once in while, it hails--so tell him to bring a hard-hat! And by the way, he must not move my garden tools when I'm using them. If I step on my trowel or hand-rake, I'll know it was him! Then there would be consequences!!!
2007-08-06 16:36:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everyone knows that the only way to get rid of a gnome is to put him out on your lawn for an hour. Then, someone will gnomenap him and take him on an around-the-world trip, sending you pictures from every stop.
2007-08-06 16:18:36 · answer #2 · answered by Robin M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to call in those gunite-concrete spraying people. They can spray him with a concrete coating that will make him solid and unmoving forever.
That is how most garden gnomes are created. After the concrete hardens get a couple of friends to help you drag him upstairs and into your garden.
2007-08-06 16:22:24 · answer #3 · answered by Rich Z 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once again, bad stereotype of any gamers. Yes, there could be people living in their basement having no life playing WoW, but not even most players do that. I haven't heard of anyone doing that besides people on tv.
2016-05-20 02:42:38 · answer #4 · answered by daisey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lure it toward you with baked goods then, once he is close, put a sack over him and tie it up and start beating with a blunt object. But there is many ways to dispose of it once it's in a bag, like throwing it into a wood chipper, or put it in a microwave, or drop it into a big cat cage at the nearest zoo.
2007-08-06 16:24:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just happen to be a gnome removal service its not easy I can catch the little baster# but their is a small fee 24,487.62 Dollars. in cash please!
Tom
AKA the gnome killer
2007-08-06 17:36:37 · answer #6 · answered by tom k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't get that pesky gnome out of your basement, try a hand grenade on the area.
That should do it for ya. LOL
Namaste
@}--.------
2007-08-06 16:18:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's easy my friend.... goo gone!
not made for gnomes in mind but it works wonders on gum stains and leave a fresh orange scent
good luck
2007-08-06 16:18:21 · answer #8 · answered by Fighting Racoon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just make sure that you have fire insurance and give him a pack of matches. Make sure you remove all of the things you care about before giving him the matches. Good luck.
2007-08-06 17:03:26 · answer #9 · answered by dellet2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who ya goin call? GNOME BUSTERS!
I had a gnome call
1-800-GNO-MEB-USTR!!!
LOL Good luck with that Gnome of yours.
2007-08-06 16:25:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋