16 and preg!?

Question

i am 16 and am pregnant and very confused as too what i should do. I am preg to a guy I am not seeing and dont have anything to do with, my parents think the best thing for me to do is have an abortion, because i am too young , not mature and dont want to turn out like my real mother( she had me at 16 and then had 2 others and has none of us now) I am going into 11th grade and want to graduate and make something of my self. someone please help pros and cons!

Answer 1

Give the baby up for adoption.

There are women out there who can't have children. They WANT it. Do not abort the baby, that is inhumane. It is a CHILD. Just have the baby, and give it up for adoption.

My aunt adopted a baby and, well, she could love your baby better than you could ever.

Answer 2

I went through an abortion and it is the most horrible and terrible thing that has ever happened to me. The pro-choice groups don't tell you about the mental anguish abortion can cause. They didn't tell me that I would end up addicted to prescription drugs and alcohol for sixteen years following that and attempt suicide. Thanks be to God that I am finally sober and have been for one year.

However, this decision haunts me to this day and it has been seventeen years. Please don't do this. Just because you have the child doesn't mean that you can't have a wonderful life, also. Choose to put the baby up for adoption if you need to. If I can even prevent just one person from going through the torment that I have caused in my own life....

Society and people put shame on someone having a child when they are young. The real shame was going through with the abortion. It doesn't have to be like that. I could have had not only an equally happy life but a life that included a child that would be nearly grown now. Words cannot express how much abortion is so not worth it.

Answer 3

Well if you have no support that's a con for sure. You seem really young to have a baby.It would be hard at your age.
Could you give the baby up for adoption? '
Could you get put your life on hold for a while to give the baby the best start in it's life?
My baby is 11 months old and wakes up an average of 8 times a night still. How would you feel about that?
Try to remember, you are young, and your parents are trying to suggest what they think is right for you.
Could you find a way to afford to live, if your parents make you move out?
Only you really know the way you feel about it, but frankly kids are a lifelong commitment, and a lot of it isn't perfect.
(It's not all a nightmare either).
What if something was wrong with the baby? What would you do then? If it had downs syndrome or something?
Just a few things to consider.
Good luck with your decision, I hope the answer comes to you.

Answer 4

Well, darling, that is a very tough decision, and we can't make it for you, either. I think you are going to have look deep inside your soul and decide if you can live with the results of whatever you decide to do. Imagine yourself 30 years from now -- if you look back on your actions, which ones would you be proudest of? Abortion does leave a scar on your soul, no matter how matter-of-factly it's handled. You will never forget that you were pregnant, even if you are able to pick up and continue with your life with little interruption.

On the other hand, having a baby will change your life in a very fundamental way -- if you have the child and give it up for adoption, you will always be someone's birth mother, and you will always wonder about your child and hope they are safe and happy. It means going through nine months of pregnancy, and probably having people talk about you and perhaps having a reputation as "that girl who had the baby".

A lot of girls are under a great deal of peer and family pressure to keep their baby, but often, it means that both the mom and the baby have a worse standard of living in the long run. You have to be completely convinced that your child *is* better off with you, a teenager with no education, poor job prospects and no father for the baby, or adopted out to a loving family who may have desperately been waiting for a child for years..

Good luck with your decision, dear.

Answer 5

Well, to be brutally frank - you haven't finished school, don't have an apartment, a dead-end job(?) that pays enough to support the two of you, pay the doctor bills, baby diapers, clothes, formula, baby carriers and crib, toys, food, utilities, you'll be so darn tired you can't stand it, the baby will ALWAYS be FIRST for the next 18 years and YOU will ALWAYS be LAST. And where is the boyfriend?

To have an unexpected baby just to have someone to love is not enough. You know this.

You have to abort or do "open adoption".

And there are plenty of good counselors around to help with the "mourning" you will need to go through during this time period.

Good luck.

Answer 6

you have a few options.

1. abortion

2. adopt your baby out

3.have the baby

now what you need to think about it what you really want for your life and the potential life of this child.

abortion is emotionally challenging and it will be a hard decision to make. it has both pros and cons... the issue would be solved and you could get on with the life you currently live but wiht the emotional turmoil of the experience of having an abortion.

Adoption gives another family the chance to become parents, you also have to consider how you would feel if your child ever chose to look you up, would you want contact and how would you cope emotionally with this.

Having the baby is the last option, you mentioned you would like to complete school.. there are schools that cater for young mums and if you have strong family support you could consider this.

i hope i helped... good luck with whatever you choose to do.

Answer 7

i had my son at 18. I graduated high school 5 months pregnant. My parents tried the same thing, then they tried telling me about adoption, well i did neither, i had my wonderful son i couldnt be happier, in fat i married the father adn we now have 2 wonderful children, anad i am lucky enough to be a stay at home mom at age 21. I would say if you dotn want an abortion, than dont, you will regret it the rest of your life, so look into adoption. You cnahave an opoen adoption where you choose teh parents of your child. I think thats a great choice of rmany people. Sop many peopel try every year to haev a child but are nto capable of doing so. So that could be a win win situation. Its not going to be easy i will be honest, but open adoption is choice. But whatever YOU choose(not your parents) will besomethign lifelong, so dont regret anything. BUT STAY IN SCHOOL, no one can make this descision but yourself. Good luck hun and if you ned soemone to talk to email me, my email in under my profile. Good luck

Answer 8

do what you think is right. i can't tell you what to do. if you know that having a baby at 16 is the hardest thing you will ever do, but don't care because you want it, then do it! if you want to live your life and then have a baby with someone who is there, do it! i think that it is a good thing that your parents are open to abortion, because not many are and that's a problem! i have one thing to advise you on though: only do something if you are 100% sure and know the consiquences of that action. i hope the best for you! :)

Answer 9

Well.. I got pregnant at 15 to a 21 year old man.. we didnt know eachother at all, i just recently met him. well he cheated on me all the time [we got together after i told him a was pregnant].. well i went through the whole pregnancy by myself.. people may say "your never going to find someone to except you" thats wrong, you will.. however, now i am with my babys daddy and we're getting married.. im 16 and he's 22.. soo yeah..i love being a mom, i wouldnt take it back worth anything.. i'd do it all on my own if i'd have to.


basically times are hard with a pregnancy and being a teen mom, you'll get stariotyped and talked about.. but people get over it and its a great thing.

Answer 10

I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. I know how tough the pressure to have sex is. My prayer is that you will learn from this and start over with secondary virginity. It IS possible.
I so heartily agree with the other posts that have discouraged abortion. You may always regret getting pregnant so young, but it will be nothing compared to the intense regret, pain, etc. of getting an abortion. Please adopt or find a way to keep the baby yourself.
Best to you.

Answer 11

Abortion is a HUGE decision. You may end up regretting it 40 or 50 years (or more) from now. On the other hand, having a baby now will positively turn your life upside down. Maybe you will consider adoption?

Good for you for continuing your education. It's more important than most teens give it credit for. (Including me at that age.)