breast feeding hell :(?

Question

I have a newborn son (2 weeks) and I have always planned to breast feed my entire life. During my pregnancy I realized it was going to be work. After the birth of my son I started breast feeding him, never any problems. He fed well and my milk was in. The problem is me. I do not know why but I hate it, I hate everything about it. I hate that he wants to eat every hour it seems forever. I do not know why I hate this all so much and why it all makes me so stressed out and it really does. Sometimes I cry. I do not know what is wrong with me. I feel like a horriable mother for this and please do not bash me. I do not its the best thing I am just confused to why I am feeling this way over something like this. What is wrong?

and I did but an electric breast pump from the hospital. I tried pumping every night but its like I am not getting much?

Answer 1

It really sounds like you have the baby blues. You don't have to feel sad all the time to have post-partum depression, you can be angry or anxious or tired or hate breast-feeding. Your hormones are all out of whack right now because of giving birth, ask your Dr. if he thinks you have post-partum depression. And if you really hate the breast-feeding, then don't do it. It's not good for your baby to have a stressed out Mom, and it could hinder the bonding process if you feel resentment every time you nurse him. They are making formulas better all the time, and many babies grow up healthy and happy without being breast-fed. Yes breast milk is best, but not at the expense of your, and the baby's, happiness. Good luck.

Answer 2

It may just be that you are tired. It is so hard during those first weeks when they need to feed all the time and you're the only one with the breast milk. There is absolutely nothing wrong with letting somebody else bottle-feed the baby from time to time so you can rest.
Since you really wanted to breast feed and you're successful at it, perhaps it would help to remind yourself that soon your baby won't need to feed quite as often and you will get time off. I remember crying and wailing at first about how wiped out I was, but eventually she was able to get more at a sitting and didn't need to nurse as often. Keep going if you can; it really does get better.
And you may be having some post-partum depression. I took 10 mg of Paxil for awhile and that helped take the edge off things. Tell your doctor how you're feeling. You are not alone.

Answer 3

Its OK, its probably a form of post partum depression and you should speak to your doctor about it. There is nothing wrong with not breast feeding. I felt awful when my daughter was 6 weeks old she was diagnosed as lactose intolerant and I was told to cut all lactose out of my diet or stop breastfeeding. I chose to stop breastfeeding, but I felt like a failure for a while because I had breatfed my son for the first year. Breastfeeding is hard work, and it makes your body secrete hormones which could be contributing to your depression, or maybe you just need a break. Do you do anything for yourself or is it all for the baby. Try replacing one feeding a day with a bottle (that maybe you could let someone else feed him). This should give you at least enough time to take a bath and feel a little bit more like you.

Answer 4

You're not a horrible mother, and it's nice that you have decided to breast feed. I think a good option for you would be to pump also so that someone else can have a chance to feed the baby. It'll give you a break, and someone else (father, grandmother, grandfather) would get some great bonding time by feeding the baby and he's still getting the great benefits from the breastmilk.

You might be upset because of a high level of hormones. Just take your time. If you feel more comfortable later, you'll have no trouble feeding him because your body will still be producing milk. As for "nipple confusion" if you've heard of that, I had no trouble with that with my daughter. She ate from the breast and bottle with no troubles.

Answer 5

Maybe you have a little bit of the baby blues (a smaller form of post partum depression)? Sometimes that causes harsh feelings towards things. Don't be so hard on yourself. I understand how you always wanted to breastfeed and you know its best for your child, but if it is making you unhappy, that's not good for your baby. babies can sense stress in their mother and her milk when they are breastfed and that can be unhealthy for the baby.

Maybe try supplementing 1 or 2 feedings by bottle (either expressed breast milk or FORMULA) your baby will still be very healthy if they have a Little formula, and you might feel a lot better. Sometimes it is overwhelming to feel that your baby totally depends on you because you are nursing them, you'll be surprised how much stress it can ease for you to be able to skip 1 or 2 of the feedings. And try napping right after you feed te baby and let someone else get up with the baby and feed them a bottle so you can get some rest. Good luck to you, don't give up and don't be so hard on yourself!!! You are doing an amazing job, I am sure.

Answer 6

If you were a horrible mom you wouldn't be so concerned about this so don't think that about yourself!

I went through the same hell when I started breastfeeding. I cried every time she latched on because my nipples bled in the beginning. Every time I heard my baby stir in the bassinett I prayed that she didn't want to eat. It was really really hard.

I took it day by day and told myself that I would stop breastfeeding when I absolutely could not take it anymore. I told myself this everyday for six weeks and then magically the pain was gone and I was no longer miserable from breastfeeding. My daughter is six months now and I am so happy that I stuck with it.

Just hang in there for at least 4 more weeks and see if things improve! Hope this helps!

Answer 7

Breastfeeding isn't for every mom. And just becuase you choose not to breast feed dosnt make you any less a good mother. You can still have that bonding with your baby if you bottle feed.
With that being said, if you are not ready to switch to bottle yet, just give it a few more weeks. At about 6 weeks of age a baby gets into a better routine, and dosen't need to nurse every hour. It may be better than.
But if you don't think breast feeding is for you give that baby a bottle. If you are not happy the baby is not going to be happy.

Answer 8

One of the biggest myths is that breastfeeding is easy. Even if the baby takes to it right away it is still very hard work, especially when they are this little. Sometimes you just feel very overwhelmed it is hard to deal with sometimes. I remember thinking after my first child, "I don't think I could possibly leak this much body fluid from every inch of my body!" Gross I know but true. You are doing a great thing by getting your baby off to the best start. I think you should call a lactation consultant at your local hospital or the le leche league group in your area. They can provide you with lots of support. It will get better!

Answer 9

Let me suggest that you rent a good quality hospital pump for one month. Pump your milk and bottle feed your baby. Many mothers of multiples do this, so it does work. Try to adjust the process to work for you before throwing in the towel as clearly this will upset you. If it works, then buy a personal pump and feed that way.

Answer 10

OMG I can totally relate to you. All I wanted to do is breast feed too. At night my daughter would fall to sleep on a feeding and I'd take her off and she'd cry. I was soooo miserable. I felt like a failure but I had to quit. Now everything is so much easier. But if you decide to stay breastfeeding, it will get better with time.