Broken and Lost.....Please Help!?

Question

About 7 weeks ago, my girlfriend of a year and half and i broke up over a stupid fight, but since we dont live together, the distance has fueled the break up. At first it was she wanted space to figure things out, now it seems like she just doesnt care anymore. I was always raised to honor and respect, but I was always taught NEVER to give up on something you love. Fight until you die if you must, and here I am, fighting for the one girl that makes me happy, killing myself to hold her one more time. Every morning I wake up, nothing is worth it. The sun isn't bright, air always seems cold. I am so lost and I dont know what to do? Everybody tells me to let go and move on, but I cant. My heart wont let go and there is nothing I can do to change that. I miss her so bad that I feel like my heart doesnt want to beat anymore, it just doesnt care. I was raised to be so physically and mentally strong, but emotionally, I am being destroyed. I would give my life to have her back. What do I do?

Answer 1

OK so lay there !!!!

The sun will rise every morning whether you like it or not. Your heart will continue to beat whether you like it or not.
She is apparently done for some reason or the other whether you like it or not.

So yes ~ get up and move on.
One day ~ somewhere you will find that someone "whether you like it or not."

Warm Blessings to you :)

Answer 2

When you see her, tell her these exact words that you just quoted "Every morning I wake up, nothing is worth it. The sun isn't bright, air always seems cold. I am so lost and I dont know what to do? Everybody tells me to let go and move on, but I cant. My heart wont let go and there is nothing I can do to change that. I miss her so bad that I feel like my heart doesnt want to beat anymore, it just doesnt care. I was raised to be so physically and mentally strong, but emotionally, I am being destroyed. I would give my life to have her back. What do I do?"

After hearing those words, I don't know of any girl who wouldn't take you back. If I were in her predicament, I know I would.

Answer 3

If she has moved on then you have to as well. You weren't expecting it so you have to take the biggest hit and it's never pleasant. First of all you are not being destroyed, you do not kill yourself over a woman, and yes you can change the way your heart feels right now. Much as you don't want to hear it, your feelings will heal as long as you don't choose to wallow. You really need to spend some time with a counselor and quickly if you are considering doing anything serious and to help you get your feelings into a more mature level.

Answer 4

Tell her how you feel!! Maybe all she needs to hear is how you feel....examine why you broke up and see if there is any way you can appologize and fix the situation....if then she wants nothing to do with you....it will be painful, but move on ....there are so many other women out there looking for a good man...time heals all wounds...believe that...been there done that....you have a purpose in life, you can't fulfill that purpose feeling like this...so get up and move on ....feel the pain then, more importantly, let go of the pain...we all have our hearts broken at one time or another...sometimes so badly that we just can't go on....but we find the strength to carry on and later we can look back at these times and see the reason why it didn't work...it just wasn't meant to be....there is someone out there for you but you'll never find her dwelling on something that you can't control, another person loving you....it's her choice on who she wants to be with...so let go and make the choice to move and look ahead to a much brighter future...I'll be praying for you....

Answer 5

All I can tell you is that you have to give her what she wants...SPACE. I know it's hard but eventually (if she hasn't realized it yet) she will realize that she wants you and not space. This is out of your hands and you have to respect what she wants. Maybe the relationship fell apart a while ago, and you just didn't know it. There could be a lot of reasons why a partner would tell you they need space.

right now just do things to distract you from your heartache. Hang out with family and friends. Do things to make you feel good. I know I know..it's her...but you don't have her now...so go back to when you were single. What did you do to motivate you to be a better person.
Just take your time and don't call her or pressure her because you will loose her.
Good luck

Answer 6

First of all I am very sorry... But listen you cant let this take over you! I am sure it hurts but you must move on with your life if she dosent want you back. Why try to make someone love you.... I am very positive that you will find someone else eventually that will replace that void in your life. By chasing after her you are making yourself look very desperate and needy and no one wants someone like that. All of this energy and strength that you are waisting on this girl could be used in other ways. TRUST ME YOU WILL FIND LOVE AGAIN of course it may never compare to the love you had for her but eventually you will heal from all this. Seriously I think you should seek some counseling and get some help for all this hurt. Good Luck to you!

Answer 7

Well, I'm not sure what you've tried to do to reconcile with her; I'm going to assume that you have been, and that you haven't just given her her 'space' by assuming that means leave her alone...

...but you should also remember to love yourself. Remember that you matter, too, and you shouldn't give up on yourself. Seek solace with your friends or your family, do things to cheer yourself up and try to figure out what your next move will be. Perhaps you won't get back together with your girlfriend, perhaps you will - you can't force something to happen, but you can still take control over your own life.

If you continue to feel depressed, you should seek counselling. I know most people think that seeing someone like that is something to be ashamed of, that there's a big social stigma about it, but you can't let that stop you. No one needs to know, and your true friends won't think less of you for going.

Answer 8

Wow. I honesty really know and feel what you're going through. I'm not lying. Your story sounds similar to mine, so here's my story and I'll tell you what I did with it :

My ex-boyfriend and I weren't together for as long as you & your ex-girlfriend were. He broke up with me during the end of March this year & I remember that day exactly. It's been almost 5 months that he broke up with me & I'm still in love with him more than ever. He's such an amazing guy & I've cried so many times, I've felt my heart really ache every night, and I also lost my motivation in life. We were just that special. He was the one who said, "I never what anything to ruin our relationship," and a whole bunch of other things. Surprisingly, he was the one who broke it off.

What I've been trying to do ever since was try to talk to him. It took me a while to realize, but I know I can't have him back. I just try to build back a friendly relationship & I've told him that I want to be the best of friends. My ex didn't blow me off & he does want to be friends, so he tries to talk to me whenever he gets the chance to, even if he is a really busy guy. We try not to make it awkward at all -- even though we both know it still kind of is.

You could also try to write her a letter telling her how you feel. I was supposed to write my ex a letter a week after we broke up, but it ended up that I wrote it in the beginning of June instead. To my surprise, he also write me a letter telling me how he felt, saying he was sorry, and explaining why he broke up with me.

Another thing I've tried to do is just keep myself busy. I know you'll think about your ex every now and then, but it's better than thinking about her 24/7. Try your best not to emotionally torture yourself - trust me, I have. Keep optimistic & always, always, always look to the future & enjoy life as it is. You may not see it now, but you will sooner or later. I sure did, even if I do still claim to be in love with him & feel some sort of "missing" feeling.

I hope I didn't confuse you & that this helped even just a little bit. :D♥

Answer 9

First of all i feel for you but what you said was soooo sweet. I think you should talk to her or write her a letter or an email telling her exactly how you feel and what you said. Tell her everything that your feeling inside and tell her everything you have ever wanted to tell her. Either she will tell you she loves you and want to make things work, or she will tell you she is sorry but she thinks it's time to move on. If thats how she feels than unfortunately as hard and painful as it may be, you will have to respect her wishes and move. You can't force someone to love you the way you love them. It will be hard but eventually you will have to pick up the pieces and move on with your life.

Answer 10

I'm sorry for your loss. What you are feeling right now is totally normal. You are in mourning for a loved one that was lost to you. She may physically still be on this earth but she is not physically with you. Only time can heal your wounds. Allow yourself this mourning period as it is normal and healthy. When you are ready you will lift out of the depression. Try to hang out with your friends at least once or twice a week to help you pull yourself out of the depression slowly. Time and patience are what you need right now.