I recently got in contact with an ex-girlfriend from my high school days more than 10 years ago. We have not spoken to nor seen each other in that time period. Upon getting in contact with each other we have become friends and have been talking a lot about what has happened in the last 10 years. She is happily married and living more than 400 miles away. I am married and both of our spouses are aware that we are in communication.
We are and have not thought about planning anything individually and in fact have been trying to plan a meeting that includes both spouses. My wife has recently demanded that I discontinue communication because it is damaging our marriage. So, my question is this. Is it wrong for one adult who is (or thought he was) happily married to communicate to an ex-girlfriend, who is also happily married, on a friendly basis?
**Keep in mind when answering that we are both open about our communications with our respective spouse.
2007-08-06 10:32:50 · 13 answers · asked by rj_mathis@sbcglobal.net 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My husband keeps in touch with all his ex's except his ex-wife. It annoyed me at first, the I met a few and realized they have nothing on me, baby!
If your wife feels that it is damaging your marriage, then it is even if you don't think so. Which is more important: talking to your ex or keeping your wife?
2007-08-06 10:38:20 · answer #1 · answered by biology.teacher 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The question is, is it really damaging your marriage? Because if your wife is right about that, then yes, you should stop talking to this other woman.
No matter who your friends are - male or female - if they are somehow hurting your relationship with your wife, you need to quit associating with them. A woman you used to know 10 years ago is not as important as the one you have marriage vows with.
2007-08-06 10:38:12 · answer #2 · answered by ♥≈Safi≈♥ ☼of the Atheati☼ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Personally I don't see a problem with it so long as you really feel nothing for her beyond friendship. I don't really get the "don't be friends with ex's" thing. There is one I wouldn't be friends with because I still have feelings for, but others I'm still friends with - in varying degrees - one of them helped me through a really hard part of my life and one of them is one of my best friends, but we're like brother and sisteer. I wouldn't stop being friends with these because friendship is all there is now. Be honest with your wife and tell her how you feel. If she really objects to your friendship with your ex you may have to make a choice between the 2.
2007-08-06 10:38:57 · answer #3 · answered by Alex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that if you were happily married as you say you wouldnt have to be communicating with an ex girlfriend from your past...it seems to me as if you are starting to question your marriage just because of this one ex girlfriend...you should respect your wife wishes and put yourself in her shoes...how would you feel if your wife got in touch with one of her exes and wanted to plan a meeting including you...how would that make you feel? wouldnt that make you think...why on earth would she want to see him again? well...thats exactly what she is thinking about you....
2007-08-06 10:38:20 · answer #4 · answered by Preciousme 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some ladies can be so insecured about their spouse. Well, you should talk to her that you just want to be friends with the ex. Of course, show her that she is the one for you
Good luck!
2007-08-06 10:47:15 · answer #5 · answered by Hope 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not necessarily wrong, but something is bothering your wife. I'd highly suggest a sit down discussion with your wife to find out if she thinks you've crossed the line somewhere.....
Good luck.
2007-08-06 10:36:41 · answer #6 · answered by Answer Queen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, no, no,no! It's wrong and you know it. Don't try to justify it otherwise. Let the old girlfriend be a nice memory. You got busted and problems ensued. Don't get her in trouble too -- you're playing with fire.
2007-08-06 10:37:26 · answer #7 · answered by Mr G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my question is:"Why do you feel the need to keep in contact with your ex?" The most important thing is how partner feels about the matter.
2007-08-06 10:59:56 · answer #8 · answered by mz. vee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wife trumps ex-girlfriend. Sorry you have to cut off your friendship; I enjoy my male friendships very much (my fiance is aware of them all), but if we were married and he didn't like it, I'd have to stop. I'd rather lose them than him.
2007-08-06 10:40:03 · answer #9 · answered by misswrite1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're only asking because you are feeling guilty. you want to bone your ex. dont worry, everyone gets that feeling sometimes. your wife is probably a ***** and shes probably packed on like 90 lbs since you got married and your eyes are starting to wander.
my advice to you is to screw as many woman as you possibly can before you die because in heaven they base what level you are by how many chicks you bang.
wilt chamberlain for instance is a level 99 super-angel whereas Corky from "life goes on" probably didn't even get through the pearly gates.
good one, chief.
2007-08-06 10:38:44 · answer #10 · answered by isentaur 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋