Why are some women hostile to babies?

Question

I have a 20 month old son and he's buddy buddy with everyone. Some couples have fun with him, hold him, talk to him. While very few others would not want to be bothered. There was one woman who gave him a nasty look on the train, after my son tapped on her shoulder, which made me want to smack her. One time my son went to say hi to a woman, the woman physically became irate, she looked for his mom when I was more than 20 feet away. When she saw me, she yelled at me, "Is that your son, go grab him!" as if my son was molesting her.
I have a friend with her husband and they say they don't want any children. My son walks toward the woman. She walked backwards and avoided touching him.
My question is:
What kind of woman of child-bearing age cannot handle a baby?

Answer 1

There may be an underlying issue. One of my mother's long-time close friends refused to come to my baby shower, then when I brought my newborn daughter to their bridge night, every woman held her except that one. She acted like my baby had coodies. Turns out that she had a miscarriage when she was younger and just couldnt handle being around babies. Give them the benefit of the doubt and accept that not all people like babies and kids!

Answer 2

Just because a woman can physically have a baby doesn't mean she has to. It's not natural law, as many people incorrectly assume, that women have to procreate.

I'm the extremely proud mother of a 10-month-old. But I know that babies are not everyone's cup of tea. Personally, I'm not one of those people who coo and caa at every baby I see. I'm not a baby person unless it comes to my own. And, frankly, I'm offended when complete strangers or even aquantainces come running at my child asking to hold her with their hands already reaching out. It's creepy.

It sounds like you've dealt with some rude people, but it's hard to say what else was involved in those instances. People have bad days. And perhaps the woman who didn't see you right away thought your child was on his own. When I see children away from their parents, my first reaction is, "Where the heck are that kid's parents?! Abduction! Hit by a car!" Etc.

Go easy on the childless. Not everyone swoons at the sight of a baby.

Interesting question.

Answer 3

I agree with the first poster. I LOVE my children dearly, but still other peoples make me uncomfortable. I am just not really a kid person. Now I do like babies but once they reach about 2.5 to 3 I don't know. I get nervous when I volunteer for Sunday school or anything. Maybe part of it is that some parents are so overbearing you can't be sure if you will offend a parent or make a child uncomfortable. I know that sometimes I wish that all the people in line at Walmart would not play with my children. I try to teach them to be warry of strangers and then here we are at the store and strangers are playing with them. Maybe I am just weird LOL

Answer 4

There are a lot of women who aren't child orientated....and I don't understand it either. In the beginning that was what we were put here to do and I always thought it was just basic instinct to want to love and nurture a child. I know I have always felt that way since I was child. I guess I don't have a good answer for you....maybe some of these women who are against children should step up and answer your question! Good luck.

Answer 5

Some people believe that a child should be seen and not heard. Which is wrong. Some people just sit and say "if that was my child....." but they don't know until they have one.

You also have to understand that some people don't look at your child the way that you do. Even though we think that our children are cute and great........others have a different opinion. When your child is tapping someone.......he is trying to be friendly.......he just wants to say hi, but some people would say that you need to make him sit quietly. Some people beleive that in public your child needs to be on it's best behavior..........some people will socialize right back.

If I were you I would not take offense........but when you go somewhere just be careful of who he taps.........or talks to......make sure they are not in "beast mode" or that they are not busy.

Answer 6

I think it's just not for some people. You can psychologically analyze it till you turn blue in the face. Some people I'm sure had bad childhoods and fear passing it on to their own children. Some people were only kids growing up and have no idea how to even address a child. And some people are just jerks....the list goes on.
The point is, you have no control over other people and their reactions to your kids. You can just take comfort in knowing thats not you. It's each person's choice as to whether they want children or not. As you might think they're crazy for not wanting them, they might think you're crazy for having them.

Answer 7

I am learning that many more women do not like kids, and me and my 2 kids are living in a nightmare with a next-door neighbor who loved my kids until they became older and louder. They are not bad kids in any way, but she can't stand the noise they make, and the games (like swords, cops and robbers, even Star Wars "remakes") enacted by 9-10 years olds has her believing that they are growing up violent and will probably hurt her or her property one day.

She has never had kids, herself. I think she suffered somehow from kids when she was one. IDK!

She is paranoid about everything though, not just kids...

You just have to ignore it, I guess.

Answer 8

There are so factors that could be the cause of this reaction, I don;t know where to begin. Not all women are destined to want and have kids - this is a good thing. Many women who HAVE kids, should not - as they are unable to care for them properly. MY suggestion is to not take it personally and keep your child close at hand. Never assume ANYTHING about strangers.

Answer 9

letting your toddler wander around the train touching people is a little bit much, not for their sake, but for his. Theres a lot of creeps out there, and its just not the best parenting choice ever.

As for mean women, i have no clue. Ive never ever ran into a person like that, except for one nurse at the hospital. Who I reemed up one side and down the other, threatening all sorts of bodily harm if she ever touched my child.

Answer 10

I love my own kids, but I do not want to touch or play with other people's babies. May not make sense, but that's just the way I am. Chances are, some of those people have children of their own, too, but aren't comfortable with someone else's.