Religion - pregnancy has me thinking of it differently....?

Question

I am not a very religious person. I believe there is a higher power for everyone but I am not sure that it is God. Since I have been pregnant (and I am only 6 1/2 weeks), I have been thinking alot about a baptism and finding a church. I guess it isn't that I dont believe in God, Im just not sure. Do you think that I would be a hypocrit for attending church and having my baby baptized even if I am unsure about my religious views. I just think "Oh Geez - what if I am wrong and damning my child" if I don't do it. Again, please no hateful replies. Spirituality is a journey that we all go on at different paces. I admire you if you are strong in your faith but please don't criticize me for not having that same resilience. I wish I just believed. I am thinking about my child though. My mom forced me to attend church until I was 16 so I feel like I have a good background and I think I want to give that to my child so that he can make an educated decision about his own views. Thanks.

Yep - I was raised Catholic. Funny how people knew that. :)

Answer 1

Hi there,

Well, there's many reasons why you could be having these feelings. For one, it's normal for maternal instincts to kick in when you're pregnant and as a mom, of course you always want to keep your child safe and protected. Another thing I'm thinking is perhaps God has given you this beautiful little miracle to bring you closer to Him and help you find your way. Just a thought, don't take offense to it. In any case, I think you should go with your feelings. There's a reason why you're having them. Take your time and find a church that you feel comfortable with. Go to a few different ones. As for baptism, people believe different things about when that should take place. If you're leaning towards doing it as an infant, then go with it. All you can do as a parent is the best you can do. Lay the foundation and as you said, your child can figure out his/her own path with the education you've provided.

I was raised Catholic too, so if you need someone to talk to I'm here.

Good luck to you and congrats on your pregnancy.

.... and P.S.
You were smart NOT to post this in the religion section...those zealots would have been all over you, lol. Yikes!

Answer 2

I've been having the same thoughts actually. It's funny how pregnancy gets us thinking isn't it?

I personally haven't found a single religion that I agree with. So what I've been doing is visiting different churches for a few weeks and trying to get a feel for that religion. I'm hoping this will help me decide what I ultimately want for my child. And then sometimes I think, I won't force my child into a baptism or a religion. I'll just educate him/her on what's out there and let him/her make a conscious decision when s/he's old enough.

I hope that helps, and don't worry about it too much. Anything you decide for the betterment of your baby will be the right choice. Congratulations!

Answer 3

It's natural to think about these things when you're pregnant.

Don't feel pressured to find a place to attend right away or even to baptize your baby.
A baby won't ever be damned to hell. Ever. The Bible says we have to believe and be baptized for remission of sins, which implies you have to be old enough to understand things at least on a basic level (I've sinned and want to change). And there are no examples (or commands) of babies being baptized in scripture at all; only those who understood Jesus' sacrifice and the purpose of baptism-remission of sins.

I don't see why you can't find a place to worship so your baby can attend Bible class and VBS and all that without having to have your baby baptized or commit to anything yourself. Maybe you can start now, so maybe you will find a place before the birth or at least have narrowed it down.

By being firm and loving you can set a good example at home. That will probably have the most influence. I do applaud you for being concerned about the spiritual well being of your baby. Not everyone thinks about that, but I think it is a good idea. He will have the instruction and can make an informed decision on which way he wants to go when it's time. Often kids begin to think and understand these things much earlier than they would get a drivers license (for those who say I'm not taking them, but the child is free to choose) so I think it's great to find a place to attend regularly. You may find yourself on a different path than before, but the same as your child's. Who knows.

I can answer more questions by email-my yahoo address is my Answers ID.

www.tftw.com has some info
www.christiancourier.com is good

Answer 4

If you are having these thoughts then there must be a reason. It sounds like although you have questions and doubts (everyone does, even the most religious people) you want your child to be raise like you were. I say do what you feel. Don't worry about if other think. You are right, everyones spiritual journey is different and that is a good thing because every person is different.

Answer 5

You were brought up catholic I assume. Where everything is about works and damnation. God isnt about that crap. Jesus died to save everyone, not because they did or COULD do anything, but because they were helpless.

Baptism is the outward expression of what has already happened inside, you cant baptize someone and MAKE them be saved and go to heaven. Its a choice, and every person reaches an age and an awareness where they make that choice.

As for your child, do what you think is best to point him or her in the right direction. Its honerable for you to want to do whats right for your baby. But how can you know whats right if you havent actively searched for it yourself?

Do what you believe is best. All people are hypocrites, its the nature of being failable humans. Theres no condamnation for those in Christ Jesus. He promised that.

Answer 6

i was brought up a catholic & i was very lost, i messed up a lot, even thou i've always believed there's God.. i just always thought that no matter what i did, He'd always forgive me..

I became a Christian a few years ago & my whole life changed.. even thou it is the same God, It's a different view.. it's living your life guided by the Bible, & i am so grateful.. i went through something very very intense & it showed me that God is always with me..

It's not about religion, it's about belief.. i am not ''religious'' at all, i just have faith, Believe & Love God.. .. i dont pray by memory like i used to.. it's all different ... & now that i'm pregnant i want my child to know All of Gods promises for his/her life.. i wouldnt take that away from him/her.. It is your choice, but you should give you kid the chance to KNOW God & then decide for himself.. let him be baptized when he is old enough to decide..

Answer 7

I know how you feel. when i married my husband, who was catholic, i hadn't been to church for 4 years. I was not catholic, but the father of the church who met with us, said that he grew up with his parents going to different churches. he suggested that i look and see if there's a church that i liked. i went to 4 different churchs and finally found the one that fit what i was use to. i'm not a big participator at church and don't get involved in many things, and in some churches, they want you to get involved. while being pregnant and i'm 22 weeks, it's sometimes nice to sing the songs you were use to singing when you were growing up, whether you were forced to go or not. my sister who was active in our church growing up, stopped going after she got married, her child who is now 7 has not been baptized. It's going to be your choice. my husband's family who is very religious wanted me to convert and i held my ground saying that i wouldn't. i have my own opinions and there are things that i wonder about like you, but unless you sink yourself into the religion you choose, I don't think you'll fully have your mind made up. It's a difficult topic and one that you'll have to decide on what is best for your and your child.

Answer 8

I think it's wonderful that you at least want to provide that baptismal basis for your baby; you're taking a "just in case" approach is very responsible.

Your best bet is to check with a few churches and explain your situation. They'll all try to sell you on their religion being the "right" one, but they also should be more than accommodating to your child.

Just a thought, but since Catholics tend to be pretty strick, you may want to check with more open type of churches. Perhaps ELCA (Lutherans) or Methodists. They might be more accommodating for you.

Answer 9

I don't think that is hypocritical at all. We are taking our children to church even though we hate churches. We just have yet to find one that is not judgemental of others. We are non denominational and have a very mixed religion family so we have beliefs from many religions. We will take our children to Sunday school and then when they are old enough let them decide what they believe.

Answer 10

I'm glad to know that at least you're thinking of such things because they are very inportant issues.
My question for you is, why would you want to have your child baptized into a faith that you're really not sure of?
In our church, when you have your child baptized, you promise (to the church family and most of all to God) that you will raise this child to live a life for God. you're promising your child back to God, who has given him/her to you in the first place.
In my opinion you should be sure that the faith is right for you and what you want before you promise your child into it. Be sure for yourself first.