Need messy roommate advice...?

Question

I live with 2 girls in a 3 br, 2 ba apt with a laundry room. 1 of my roommates is MESSY, the other a neat freak. I fall somewhere between neat freak and tidy.

I share a bathroom with Messy, and (of course) we all share the kitchen/laundry/living room.

PROBLEM: Messy leaves dishes filled with nasty water in the sink. Doesn't cover food in the microwave. Won't wipe down counters. Has NEVER contributed to the purchase of trash bags, cleaning supplies, paper towels, etc. Leaves wet washrags piled in the bathroom, has only once scrubed the floor/shower/toilet. Uses the kitchen as her personal drying rack for wet clothes (when we've got a laundry room...a whole room for washing). Eats my food, uses my laundry supplies, sleeps on the couch b/c her bed is always covered with dirty clothes...you see my problem?

Any ideas for addressing the issues tactfully? Tried both letting the mess go for weeks and leaving notes. Have a chores chart on the fridge...doesn't do her share.

We tried the "sit down and discuss responsibilities" thing. Messy was around for about 5 minutes then shut herself away in her room. I just need suggestions on how to approach her about how we're feeling. We're friends. I don't want to offend her or upset her... We've tried to be fair, tried several different things. Just wondering if anyone has any thoughts.

Answer 1

ok well i think u should talk to Messy or as the other girl if u can share bathroom/kitchen/etc.

Answer 2

Aside from kicking her out, first, talk to her. Explain to her that she is a slob, but in a nice way. If that doesn't work, try to keep her mess in her room. If she is putting clothes in the kitchen, wet or not, put them in her room. If she complains, tell her that you and the neat freak don't want to see her mess.
As far as her leaving messes, the only thing I could suggest on that, is have you and neat freak go away for a while, or simply resist cleaning up and let it get messier.
Her sleeping on the couch, I assume there is a tv there, when you have a day off, stay up really late and watch tv on the couch. Invite some friends over and have them sit on the couch. Basically, make her either stay up, or sleep in her bed.
As far as eating your food and using your stuff, you can eaither deal with it, don't buy it, or lock it up. Take your detergent to your room. If she goes in there, you can make a bigger complaint for her going into your room.
Another idea for that is to have everyone pitch in for those items, that way, if she east or uses them, she is paying for it too.

Unfortatly, some people are slobs. I had a roommate that didn't work, and would only do dishes, and clean the kitchen, but she would stay up all night playing on my computer, and sleep in until 4pm. I get up at 5:30 am, and this drove me nuts. My gf and I decided to kick her out, but we waited until she went to visit friends out of town, and when she asked for a ride back, I told her to stay there, and I would bring her stuff to her in a few days. It worked, for me.

Answer 3

if you did not sit down and discuss living and ground rules for your shared home before you all moved in together, then no wonder you're having issues.
it's probably time to have a group discussion about chores, cleaning up after yourselves, and general respect for the community living areas.
perhaps each of you can take a part of one day of the week to do some cleaning in community living spaces so that the mess doesn't get out of control.

sometimes we have to compromise and help each other out.. this includes the messy one too

Answer 4

HAHA OMG! GROOOOSSSS... Nag him lol! once you notice his boogers interior the bathe bypass get him and be like "wipe this crap off top now please ^-^" and stay there to be certain you notice him sparkling it up. And do this everytime it happens :P that would paintings with the different stuff too? yet i actually do no longer understand...