OK. How do you tell a friend that she might need professional help?

Question

My friend will get mad and then the next minute, she never was. I don't understand whats wrong with her. how am i supposed to tell her that she needs professional help when i know she'll get mad? i think she really might be bipolar!!! HELP!

Answer 1

thats a tuff 1 but is this friend really like uumm ur bestest friend in the world cuz u cant just tell someone they need help unless u no them like that my suggestion is you come out rite to her and if she gets mad then u no thats not ur real friend...Gud luck

Answer 2

If she is bipolar, telling her she needs help wont do much good whether she gets mad or not. I had a cousin who had major bipolar swings. When she was in a Manic phase, you couldn't tell her anything. She was invincible - or at least she thought she was - and did some pretty crazy things which nobody could stop her doing because she never broke any laws. When she came down from the high, she'd go through several weeks of deep depression, and you still couldn't tell her anything because it just wouldn't register.

Once in a while she would be totally stable, and would act just as normal as could be. Then various people would try to talk to her about the importance of taking her medications to help stop those awful mood swings. She'd agree and swear that she would follow doctor's orders. She'd take her meds for a while, but they didn't totally stop anything from happening, so when it was time for her to get into another Manic High, just enough of it would get through the medication that she'd start feeling "powerful" again, and decide she didn't need anything. Without them altogether, her manic condition quickly accellerated till she was going "full throttle" off on another rollercoaster ride that totally disrupted her life, alienated all her friends and family who just didn't want to be around her, and got her into all kinds of messes that others would later have to try and get her out of. She'd go around buying all kinds of jewellery on credit that she couldn't afford, and it would all eventually have to be returned.
That's the problem with BiPolar. The person still has the legal right to do anything legal he or she wants to do, even if it is totally self destructive. They can't be committed against their will to any sort of care, and they can't be forced to take their medications.
Unless you can get your friend in a calm and receptive mood sometime, and explain to her that her behaviour is erratic and for her own sake she needs to see a doctor to figure out what's causing it, there is little else you can do.

Answer 3

I think the best thing that you can do and go to your friends parents and talk with them about what has been going on in the friendship. You telling her she may need help, may affect the friendship. I would not bring up to the parents that you think she is bipolar, but definitly make sure you let them know that you are very concerned. Maybe you and her parents will discover you are all going through the same thing. This might send out a red flag to her parents they need to step in take some action. Is she having these moodswings just with you or other friends? I listed two sites that have some good information on bipolar disorder. What ever you decide to do, do it carefully and put thought into it because she may other problems and not know how to express them and may need a good friend to help her through it.

Answer 4

Samantha if indeed you are a true friend then you will bring the topic up as natural as you would the weather or men or whatever you talk about with ease. This person may indeed be offended at first but hopefully will realize that what you are saying is the truth and recognize that their behaviour at times can be erratic. Be as careful with your selection of words to express this to her and let her know that you are concerned because she is such a good friend. If you need to you could even volunteer to escort her to the doctor or whatever sort of professional she should visit in order to support her. It may be necessary for her to take medication in order to help control this temper or she may need only take part in some counselling, the doctor who sees her will know what is best. Everyone could use a friend like you, one that is honest caring and open to help. Best of luck to both of you and may your friendship last a lifetime.

Answer 5

Do a little research on the symptoms of bipolar disorder. Spend a few days tracking her mood swings so that when you sit down with her again you have facts and figures. If she still refuses to see it, you can't force the issue, but you can point out each time it happens. As others see it happening, they can confirm your suspicions.