Husband wants to make will to leave everything to kids from ex-wife?

Question

My husband has kids from previous marriage. We are planning to have a baby, but I am not pregnant yet.
On the meantime, my mom in law wants my husband to make a will that states that if he dies, everything goes to his kids. Can he do that?
He signed his life insurance (the one he gets from work) to his kids. Is that legal?

Tthe main issue hear is that I make more money then he does. I put the down payment on the house we bought. I bought our cars and I pay the mortgage. Most of his money goes to the ex wife as she won very high alimony and child support.
I think its not fair that he is leaving me with nothing. I usually reject the subject when it comes up, so, there is no will so far (other then putting his kids as beneficiaries on his life insurance).
Is there anything I can do to make sure that I am the beneficiary on his life insurece?

Answer 1

He can make his children the beneficiaries of his life insurance, yes. It's legal. Nothing wrong with it.

He can draft a will that leaves the bulk of his estate to his children, yes. He can also stipulate that any "future children" be included in the inheritance.

Anything you own jointly will be yours outright without being in the will. (House, contents, cars, etc.). Spouse should be the beneficiary of pension plans and retirement accounts. Get a good estate planning attorney to help you navigate this one so everyone is happy, it will be well worth the money.

Answer 2

Yes your husband can do that. I have a life insurance policy and my daughter and son are the beneficiaries. My husband at the time was not put on it by my choice.
I can totally understand how you would be so upset about all of this especially when it sounds to me like you're the one bringing home the bacon. And for what? So his ex can benefit from it? In short no there isn't anything you can do besides asking him to put you on his policy. It's purely his choice. Just because you're his wife doesn't mean your entitled. That's why there's a policy, so he can mandate who gets what. Does he have a will? I would suggest you sit down and talk to your husband about this. At the very least, when/if you guys have a child or children, they better be included on his policy as well. I give you the utmost respect for not kicking his teeth in yet. I wish you the best in this situation.

Answer 3

I think it depends on the state you reside. Your husband can't leave property you both own to just his kids if you don't agree to it. He can try but he won't get very far. If he chooses to leave his life insurance to the kids, I don't think there is much you can do about it since it's a personal policy. To be fair, when you make your will, it should have wording that should anything happen to him, you automatically get everything. If you both die, your will can be worded to include any and all future children (i.e., those not born yet). I would consult a lawyer and fast. If he predeceases you and leaves everything to his kids, you may have to fight for what is rightfully yours. Another way is to make sure only YOUR NAME is on the house, the cars, etc. If you're the one footing the bill, don't put his name on anything. Let him leave whatever he wants to his kids, so long as you haven't been the one paying for it.

Answer 4

Depending on your state the new spouse (you) will need to sign an authorization for any death benefits to go anywhere if you are to be excluded. Most states are community property states and this would be with a current spouse living with them.

If your husband sets up any retirement, or any personal items/assets to go to someone else without your approval you will be able to stop it with an attorney.

I would consult with an attorney about how this how to handle this properly.

Check with your state about the life insurance, I believe if an employee has a spouse the spouse is to be included.

I don't know why your husband would not include you on any of these death benefits. Have a talk with him about it.

You are his new family now and he should realize that he needs to have you taken care of if something was to happen to him.

His responsibility is to you and his kids (as long as they are minors) or attending collage. Notice you should be first the list.

If his kids are minors he can have assets put into a trust fund that manages these funds for the kids so the ex-wife doesn't get the control of it.

I would make sure that you are included in any benefits before have a baby with this man. My opinion anyway.

Good Luck
Glenn

Keep in mind he cannot will anything that you two have aquired together, house, cars, etc.

Answer 5

You should be asking your husband that question, not us. He's being a good father leaving what he can to his kids, however, he needs to make sure it's put in trust or regulated so that his ex can't loot it all and leave nothing for them.

If the custody/alimony agreement is bordering on rediculous, he may want to think about getting a lawyer to renegotiate. If you guys have a baby, he needs to leave something to you two as well. Is a separate policy a possibility?

Answer 6

If he were to die you can contest it with the courts. I would get an annulment from this man now!! He wants to half way marry you and you can't half way marry someone. I would discuss this with him. If him doesn't add you as a beneficiary, i would give my notice and get out of the relationship while you still can before you have any children. this is NOT a thoughtful loving husband. If has no thought for you and your needs. Talk with a lawyer. You need help with this. It is a problem which must be resolved before you can go any farther in this life with him. You are his wife for God sake. What is wrong with him???? I think, he is selfish and self centered, and greedy for his kids and himself. Get yourself a man who really loves you.

Answer 7

You need to have a frank discussion about this with your husband. Part of the reason for having life insurance is to cover the costs of the funeral and burial. How are you supposed to do that if all the money is going to his kids from his previous marriage. Also, if something were to happen to him you would be stuck with all the debt that both your names are on. I would think that you should be the beneficiary on the life insurance and then his will should specify what amount should be given to the children. Also, if his wife was awarded such high alimoney and child support but he doesn't make that much money, maybe he needs to go back to court to get the alimony and child support amended. Plus, the legalities of all of this are probably going to depend on what state you live in.

Answer 8

Well in my opinion if you bought everything make sure your end is covered too! Cause if the ex wanted to be a b**** then she can get that 2. I would just tell him to put on the policy to split the insurance 3-4 ways [depending on how many kids] So this way his kids get their share and you would get yours. Tell him straight out it's not fair... especially considering you pay everything.

Answer 9

Well, technically, once he is remarried the life insurance is supposed to go to you as a primary beneficiary and the children are conditional beneficiaries (i.e. they get the $ if you aren't around). But if he makes out a will more than likely there will be a place for him to list all children (including any children that you two will have in the future).
Talk to him about it and have him list you as the beneficiary of his money and his life insurance and in turn you sign some kind of contract stating that after all mandatory expenses are taken care of (funeral expenses, etc.) that certain percentages will be divided between all the children and yourself.

Answer 10

If you are planning to have children together than a will has to reflect all his children not just his family with his ex. If he writes the will now he will have to adjust it later and should want to. Why would a man want to reject his new family? His in-laws have nothing to say about what he wishes to do. What you need is an attorney and soon. You will not be left with nothing as you are the wife and legally half goes to you with other monies designated to whomever. Otherwise all monies go to you to be dispersed as you see fit. Get an attorney.