I have not been romantic with my wife in over a month. I told her that I wanted her to iniate the contact. Before leaving for work she implied for me to come directly home tonight. Should I give in?
2007-08-05 09:59:32 · 25 answers · asked by Buddy Love 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm just laughing because this sounds like me and my hubby...
Honestly, my darling hubby tried this and I didn't initiate just to prove a point... One of you must give in though at some point in time or your marriage will drown... You don't want that. If you told your wife that she had to initiate or you wouldn't give it then she may be trying to prove her point. With both of you trying to make a point you can both hurt your marriage.
I know that it's hard sometimes being a wife and a mother to 3 young kids... I'm tired but still we need to make time for US or there won't be an us!!! You must do the same!!! You need to find the US again!
2007-08-05 10:23:50 · answer #1 · answered by Susan Goodknight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not? You told her that you wanter her to make the first move. So if she's willing to 'give in' to your ultimatum, why not accommodate her?....
Unless you're just into playing sick, childish games with her.
Holding out on affection IS childish. Getting mad and withholding anything from anyone is something that is done in daycare between toddlers. Playing the ultimatum card never really secures what you want. People often give in either to keep the peace (which means they really didn't want to), or, because they feel that it's a card they can pull when they want something. We adults should be more empathetic with one another. When you do positive things for someone, you get a positive outcome, likewise with the negative actions.
If you want to end your marriage, just say so. Don't play games that would ultimately lead to the deterioration of it.
If you love your wife, and felt that you were getting neglected, then communicate that to her as well. Hopefully, she is understanding and would remember why she loves you so much.
Best wishes on a happy marriage!
2007-08-05 17:12:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are damaging your relationship by playing childish games, rather than let this drag out for a whole month surely it would be more sensible to talk and sort the problem out on the day it becomes an issue.
2007-08-06 09:27:48 · answer #3 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what are you waiting for? she is your wife not your neighbor or just somebody you picked up across the street. i was just wondering which one is wearing the skirt in the family with your question. you are the one who should be initiating these kind of situations. do not wait for her to decide. do whatever you think you have to do to make her feel loved and important in your life do not pass any minute of your day letting her know that you are important to her. even a little note in your bathroom mirror saying how is your day will make your wife's heart flutter with excitement and i bet you you do not need to ask. women appreciates back 200% of what you give them.
2007-08-05 17:13:03 · answer #4 · answered by netz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whats to really be gained here acting like a little kid? Be the man here and take the iniative tonight and forget the kid games and everyone wins
2007-08-05 17:13:07 · answer #5 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are physically and emotionally attracted to your wife, YES! I can tell you from personal experience that your desires to initiate are well intended, but romance is not like a space shuttle flight... not everything needs to be perfect.
2007-08-05 18:03:23 · answer #6 · answered by Kevin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well yah I would think so. Women don't feel comfortable initiating because it makes them feel vulnerable. They are afraid you will push them away or make fun of them. It is a more macho thing to do according to some women. Heck apparently she wants to with you... go for it!
2007-08-05 20:45:01 · answer #7 · answered by Sumoneconcerned 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might as well. This is an important part of your lives. Not a good subject to bear grudges about. Just look for the next opportunity to suggest to her the ways that she might be helpfull. good luck
2007-08-05 17:04:45 · answer #8 · answered by Robert K 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Let me get this straight, it's been over a MONTH and your capable of putting together a rational sentence?? Wow!! that's pretty good.... Hey, let your little brain do the thinking on this one..
2007-08-05 17:13:13 · answer #9 · answered by gamerunner2001 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You told her to initiate the act and now that she is doing that your not going to do it. Maybe you dont deserve this woman and should give her up
2007-08-05 17:21:46 · answer #10 · answered by fortyninertu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋