I got a tattoo a couple of months on my back shoulder...its just a tribal with a rose in the middle. My husband hates it and never wanted me to get it in the first place. Now I feel really bad about getting it and considering removing it because I made the decision without putting his feeling in consideration. I know removal leaves scars and I am willing to live with them. I am 31 and waited a long to get this tattoo, its something I have always wanted. What should I do? And was I was wrong for not considering how he felt about it?
2007-08-05 07:47:21 · 36 answers · asked by Kristi 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Also, he never told me to have it removed. I just know how he feels about it. Considering to remove it is my idea, and I have not shared that with him yet.
2007-08-05 07:54:40 · update #1
If your husband truly loves you, he will understand that the tattoo is important to YOU and you should not have to remove it. You say you waited a long time, so you obviously put alot of thought into it before you did it. Was there some reason you didn't discuss it with him? Is he judgemental and you knew he would say NO if you asked him? That should tell you something. Keep the tattoo. It's part of who you are and he should be able to accept that. If not, well maybe you need to look at your relationship............good luck!
2007-08-05 07:52:37 · answer #1 · answered by lolo2459 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I obviously don't know your husband but what's the big deal? It's a tattoo that sounds like it can be easily covered with clothing anyway. If you want my opinion, I personally feel it's a control issue with your husband. You're 31, not 13 and he isn't your father. Unless he's gonna divorce you over it, I say keep the tattoo. It's something YOU wanted and waited for. If it's that important to him, sit down and talk to him. Explain that it's just a simple tattoo and it's something you really wanted. If there was something he really wanted and it wasn't harming either of you, I'm sure you would let him do it because it was important to HIM right? It's YOUR body. Granted you are his wife, but you are NOT a possession.
Good luck to you sister!
2007-08-05 07:57:17 · answer #2 · answered by glittereyedg 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give it six months and maybe your husband will grow to like the tattoo. I have done things my husband tells me he didn't like, but then after he has time to get use to the idea he changes his opinion. Maybe yours won't, but to rush into a change that will cause you pain and suffering should be your last alternative. As for whether you should have asked your husband's opinion first? Well, it would have been nice but not mandatory since it is your body. But since you feel so strongly about pleasing him maybe you should have told him first for your own peace of mind. Hindsight is 20/20 though, so you shouldn't beat yourself up over something you can't do over. People make mistakes and learn from them. This is just one example.
2007-08-05 08:16:03 · answer #3 · answered by mafiosu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you knew that your husband didn't want you to get it, and you got it any way, I think that is pretty messed up. But I don't think that you should get it removed. I think that tatoo's are sexy on women as long as they are in good taste. I think that you would regret getting it removed. Your husband will learn to live with it. Even if you do decide to get it removed, he might complain about the scar that it is gonna leave.
2007-08-05 10:04:34 · answer #4 · answered by jon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, I'd keep it. It's on YOUR body, it's for YOU, and it's something YOU always wanted. It's your decision and you have a right to it. Keep in mind that nearly 60% of marriages end in divorce these days. If that happens later down the road, you will SO regret having it removed, all for the sake of another person. When it comes to MY body, I do what I want. I have to wake up with it every day and go to sleep with every night. And if I like it, then I will do it as long as it makes ME happy. If you like it, and you wanted it, then LOVE it! Celebrate it and enjoy it! It means something to YOU, and that's all that matters.
2007-08-05 08:36:45 · answer #5 · answered by TwyztedChyck 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wanted it, you got it...if you like it keep it. Though your husband feelings are important to you and that is a good thing, whats done is done. What if you and your husband should drift apart one day, god forbid, and you had it removed; you would be left with an ugly scar of your submission to him, instead of a beautiful tattoo that you like and are proud of. You waited this long to decorate your body, don't change your mind for someone else. Choices made to please others are usually considered bad choices once those others aren't around anymore.
2007-08-05 07:54:47 · answer #6 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have your tattoo on an area of your body thats not very often exposed and the fact remains it is your body! You have not cheated, lied, beat or abused your husband, so his reaction, and the way he has made you feel is over the top. You do not need permission to do something to your body, whether its putting on makeup, dying your hair, or getting a tattoo. If I was getting another tattoo, yes, I would tell my husband but i wouls certainly not seek permission from him.
You wanted it, you did it, and your an adult, so enjoy it!
2007-08-05 08:04:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your body and your decision what you put on your body and what you remove from your body. You were not wrong for not considering his feelings.
If you are really that unhappy with that tattoo then you could consider removal, which is painful, expensive, time consuming and not 100% effective at all. Talk to your artist about it, they can tell you which method they think is best.
Also, next time before getting a tattoo or something consider whether or not you are going to care about everyone else's opinion about it...
2007-08-05 07:52:47 · answer #8 · answered by Cinoi1551 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is YOUR body. I am quite sure there are things about him that you do not necessarily like. With the placement of your tattoo, it isn't like it is in his face all the time. Tell him to get over himself. He is your husband, not your parent, you are a big girl and can make decisions on your own. Removal is like 5 times the expense of getting a tattoo, not to mention when it leaves you scarred, he will probably gripe about that.
2007-08-05 07:53:39 · answer #9 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No way in hell should you remove it!!!! Come on now, thats crazy. If its something you wanted, its your body your choice!! I cant believe your own husband would ask you to remove it, thats something a parent would do,.... not a husband!!! Keep it be happy he will get over it, if he really loves you! good luck and enjoy your tattoo!!!
2007-08-05 08:23:37 · answer #10 · answered by clr9798 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋