Met this guy online while he was in Iraq. Talked to him wrote letters for almost 7 months & things were good. He came home & things started off kind of rocky, but we got past it. Then things got rocky a couple of months later, but we got past that as well. After a year rolled around between him being in Iraq & then home, I felt like he should have been able to tell me were things were going, but he could not. I met someone else who wanted to be more serious with me & I told him I would go with the other guy because he could not tell me & I am still with the other guy. I bought the military guy a few gifts while he was in Iraq & when he came home he gave me a digital camera. Me choosing the other guy happened the last week of January & I had not heard from the military since (7 months). He said he was out of the service in June and moving out of the state. So why did I get a text today saying send me back my camera? Is this to get a response out of me or does he really want the camera?
2007-08-05 06:20:05 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
SL,
I think it is safe to say that he is looking for a response from you. Don't give him one and certainly don't give him back the camera either. It sounds to me like he may be holding an internal resentment (grudge) over the practical choice you made along with his inablity to be decisive. After all, you explained to him what you wanted/needed after his return from Iraq - it was only fair that either he be willing to move on with you or move on without you. He made his choice and he is regretting it now, C'est La Viest.
The fellow you are with is that the fellow you asked the question about on whether to "open the door" for dinner? I hope so - and I hope it all went well. Stick with what you know - you seem like a strong woman and there should be more like you in this world.
Have a good day!
2007-08-05 08:21:36 · answer #1 · answered by Gerry 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a way to not have to let go. I would venture to say that he is hurt with your decision to go with the other guy. The thing that you fail to realize is that after being in Iraq or any other country fighting through the military, coming home and re-adjusting takes some time. For some a longer amount of time is needed. This all depends on the mental ability and exactly what type of things were witnessed while over seas. You were thinking too much about yourself and decided to satisfy yourself instead of what was good for that particular relationship. He is more than likely having a rough time of it and hasn't decided that it was time to let go yet. If you are that bent on getting rid of what could turn out to be a very good man for you, then I would say to give him back his camera and move on. If I were in his shoes, I would simply count the camera as an inexpensive way to find out what kind of a woman that I was dealing with. It's better that he find out now instead on 3-4 years down the road.
2007-08-05 13:33:51 · answer #2 · answered by pappysgotitgoinon 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have one of two choices: Either, kindly tell him to stick it where the sun don't shine, a gift is a gift. Legally, you need not return ANY gifts from anyone unless it's a "conditional" gift, such as an engagement ring, If and only if the wedding doesn't occur. However, I would prefer that you don't respond at all. Afterall, how has he treated you? How many times has he responded to you in the past 7 months? Ok, then. Do nothing and keep pursuing the other guy who's more interested in you. And, have a nice life, too.
2007-08-05 13:28:07 · answer #3 · answered by Sondra 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is trying to get your attention so he is using the camera as something to talk to you about. Besides he shouldn't be asking for the camera back if it was a gift to you
2007-08-05 13:28:52 · answer #4 · answered by tiny123 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on with the new guy. The old guy just wants his camera back and wants to make your life a living hell. Good luck
2007-08-05 13:27:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't give him the camera. You shouldn't give him the power to get whatever he wants just by asking. He already gave it to you and he can't take it back now. Just go with the other guy.
2007-08-05 13:42:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is probably feeling a little put out and vendictive, so he will try and lash out at you in whatever way he thinks will cause you grief. I would send him the camera back and not feed into any thing else that he might try, that will take the steam right out of whatever he is trying to do.
2007-08-05 13:32:45 · answer #7 · answered by kmjreade 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't respond to him at all. It doesn't matter if he wants you or the camera, he doesn't have a claim on either. You, he let go, and the camera was a gift.
2007-08-05 13:24:28 · answer #8 · answered by CowboysFan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's using the camera as an excuse to contact you. (People know that once you establish contact, it's harder for the other person to avoid thinking about you.) I think he's trying to get you to answer him so he can see if he still has any chances with you.
Don't answer him and forget him- he's in the past now.
Concentrate on your life. Good luck
2007-08-05 13:30:08 · answer #9 · answered by Nena S 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The camera is a symbol. He gave it to you as a gift to demonstrate his love and affection for you. He is asking for it back to show you that he understands that you have moved on and he will also as long as you no longer have that symbol of love that he gave to you.
It is also the same with engagement rings.
2007-08-05 13:32:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋