Do you always visit your dearly departed ones?

Question

I will tommorow. It's my best friend's 6th death anniversary.

Answer 1

It's unfortunate that you lost your best friend...I hope that over time most of your pain will turn into happy memories of times the two of you shared...6 years is still a time of sorting out emotions... Friends are so special, because we choose them as our loved ones...I'm sorry for your loss and i will put you and your departed friend in my prayers...

Answer 2

What am I supposed to say to that? I surround myself with happy happy thoughts to keep the real worlds tragedies at bay and what do you do? You go and get all real life on me...
All joking a side my best friend was hit my a drink driver as she crossed the street. She was killed in April, the month and year I turned 17. She would have been 16 in august. I live with her death every day of my life and I don't have to go to the place she is buried to be close to her. However, if it makes you feel better visit as often as you need...never letting anyone tell you different.

Answer 3

Visit the graves, visit the memories, embrace the emotion that it brings. But most of all remember your are living for her/him now also. So enjoy life twice as much.


”humankind?”

“That they get bored with childhood, they rush to grow up, and then long to be children again.”

“That they lose their health to make money... and then lose their money to restore their health.”

“That by thinking anxiously about the future, they forget the present, such that they live in neither the present nor the future.”

"That they live as if they will never die, and die as though they had never lived.”

“To learn they cannot make anyone love them. All they can do is let themselves be loved.”

“To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others.”

“To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness.”

“To learn that it only takes a few seconds to open profound wounds in those they love, and it can take many years to heal them.”

“To learn that a rich person is not one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.”

“To learn that there are people who love them dearly, but simply have not yet learned how to express or show their feelings.”

“To learn that two people can look at the same thing and see it differently.”

“To learn that it is not enough that they forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”


So savor every day, Carpie Diem

Answer 4

I am sorry for your loss. I know the missing your friend may become less wrenching, but never goes away.

I don't visit graves, but become more closely aware of the loss, and visit at heart on the anniversary of a friend's death.

I lost my closest friend in December, and have been visiting him quite a bit lately in the spirit of a conversation.

Answer 5

I can't because I live too far away. I think about and talk to (in my mind) my loved ones all the time so in essence I am visiting them. I am glad you are able to visit your friends grave. I'm sure your friend would be touched by your loyalty and didn't forget them.
I am surprised at all the thumbs down for ppl who are only sharing their personal feelings. I wonder why some ppl don't like honest answers.

Answer 6

My Dad passed away 8 months ago, and its coming up his "death anniversary" and it is really bothering me. I think the 1st year isthe hardest. I miss him so much.

Answer 7

I'm sorry about your friend. I've lost some myself. I never go back to the cenetary. It hurts too much to think of the people I loved so much lying in a box. Plus, I choose to believe that they aren't really in there. That I can visit them in other places, wherever I happen to be, for instance.

Answer 8

I think I know who you are mentioning... The pain never goes away or fades , doesn't it?..

I couldn't have the courage for the visit..


Still remember him as young and live and smiling... It is better for me... He knows ı still think of him every day.. after 15 years.. he knows.. I am sure..

I hope they are both in peace now...and I wish patience to you...

Answer 9

I do some of them. It is peaceful and helps me to focus on just them for the moment. I talk to them out loud and that's one place you can do that. My cousin was killed in Viet Nam and I still wonder why he had to go and I didn't so it helps to talk it out with him once in a while. And that was in 1968. Here's a toast to precious memories! peace

Answer 10

I 'visit', but not in the way you may consider.

Their body may have died, but the love we shared lives on forever. It never ceases to "be".

Because I view their burial location as just a plot of ground where the body they no longer need is buried, I 'visit' them where ever I want to. My mother recently died and I 'visit' her (and usually catch myself smiling about it) every time I open a door for a lady, or say, "Thank You", "Please", or "May I?". I visit my grandmother every time I prepare one or more of the foods she made for us with such loving care. I visit my aunts and uncles in the same general way.

Because I see their grave site as merely a place where the remains of their 'no longer needed' body is, I don't see their grave site as a place where they are. Sometimes in the dark and stillness of my room, in the early morning hours just before I get out of bed, I 'visit' several of them.

Having said all of that, I don't see anything wrong with you going to their grave site to 'visit' with them, especially if it helps you to celebrate what you had together and not to focus on mourning their death.

I hope your visit goes well.