Divorced women answer this question for me?

Question

my wife wanted the divorce. she was depressed and emotional. we married way too soon after meeting and throughout the marriage she was jealous of anything that threatened my time with her (i.e. the occasional business trip, my children from a previous marriage, me doing anything with my friends even like going golfing once a month). i couldn't have any friends. then after awhile i could tell she wanted a divorce. told me she wasn't marriage material. kind of weird. i said OK. she left and we're going through a divorce. now she's all mad during this divorce even though it's what she wanted. she hates me now. nothing bad happened like an affair or anything. just lots of insecure fighting over nothing. she's really angry and i don't know why. i gave her all her things when she moved out. she's filing all kinds of nasty lies about me in divorce court and contacting my first ex wife and telling her lies. Why? she wanted this and is enjoying her freedom. why is she so mad?

Answer 1

She's a mental case. I wish you the best.

Answer 2

I am divorced now going on five years and I can understand how difficult things can get. Having said that I am not entirely sure why your ex is acting the way she is if this is what she wanted all along. I know from experience that there is always going to be a sense of failure or confusion when ending any marriage. I can guess that she is acting up because maybe she really didn't want the divorce and was only trying to get attention, maybe she didn't think you would let her go, maybe that if you really loved her that you wouldn't divorce her. The reality of divorce can make people crazy I know that for sure. I don't agree with the way she is acting, I have an ex that acts just like that. If you don't have to talk to her, do like I do, just don't.

Answer 3

Alright she may have told you she was not marriage material but she did marry you. For a woman this day and age you have to have either very strong feelings or love for someone because theres not one person who really wants to get divorced.She was jealous so much in your marriage because she probably felt as though everyone and everything else came first not her..And yes I'm sure at times this felt that she was being selfish to you.See it's the plain truth that everyone has their own way of being happy and maybe her life wrapped around you made her happy whereas your a very busy person and enjoys going out and being with the kids. She still loves you and I'm sure thats where all these nasty lies are coming from out of pain.It's hard to admit a part of your life is over and that there is no going back..Good luck with everything.

Answer 4

You have to ask her "why she has been so very mad"
No one else can really answer that question other than her.
I can feel your pain... Maybe she is really just a Mental case and no matter what you do or say won't make a difference.

But try to find out why she is so very mad... maybe it is because she did have the abortion and maybe now she blames you for it, maybe she is totally mad because you didn't fight enough for her... whatever it is, "she" has to tell you the real reasons and if she would stop Divorce and start if she is willing to give it another try and start both of yours Marriage over again.
But you have to find out from her & her only in one way or another... if you never ask her you will never know the answer... I think that's all you can realy do.

I wish you Luck and hope everything works out for you!

Answer 5

I am a Divorced and remarried woman. Although this woman does not sound like anything but a spoiled brat who needed her *** spanked a few more times growing up.

If she wanted to spend time with you, what i would have done was seen if i could have went with you on your golf outing once a month. Went with you with your friends and became a part of your life. Going to the ex-wife, that's crazy! Not to mention how Inmature she is. I have two children from my first marriage of 18 yrs. my children are priority, no matter how old they may get to be. I Love my now husband, although if it came down to me HAVING to chose. He would be gone. My ex and myself are good friends. I even like the woman he left me for. She is very good to my daughter, although she gets and has gotten very jealous over me and my children because ... she says that he will never Love or care about her the way he does me. That's something that happened, we had our two children, that's all either of us have or will ever have. It's just the way it is.
Jealousy is an evil nasty thing to have to live with. My husband now, has had some problems with it. I am me, and I will NOT change who I am to please him. I was this way when we met, married, and this is who I will be when I die.

Overlook Ignorance. By the way...., try to live with someone the next time for a while before (if) you ever remarry.

Answer 6

(I AM NOT A WOMAN BUT I THINK YOU WILL LIKE TO READ WHAT I HAVE TO SAY) Some people are just so "evil" and do not need any reason at all to do what this creature is doing to you. ( I know first hand.) It is strange to witness when you have never seen someone act so terrible. You are going to be so much better off when this divorce is over, you will be so at ease and at peace with yourself too. People who know you and love you, people who count and people who matter to you most will believe "you" and not the "evil witch". Try not to let her get to you. That would be giving her just what she wants and it would be the same as giving her more ammo. Hope this makes sense and helps. So I can end this by writing " there is no rhyme or reason as to why she is doing what she is doing and why she is so mad".

Answer 7

She is not so mad at you as she is with herself. She thinks she can't change but if she can change someone else that is for the better. She is in control and that is in issue in itself.

She also may have given up her friends and family, things she likes to do,etc to get married(again no reflection on you)

She feels she gave away her life and feels like she shouldn't have been made to do that(even though she is the one who caused these feelings)

She actually doesn't want the divorce, she wants to be in control, be the center of your attention. What she needs is her own group of friends so that she can go out and have fun just like you. Part of it is being a bit jealous of you. To her you have everything and she has nothing. By giving her eveything and not trying to be the bad guy you feel left out.

Right now the court probably sees her as losing her composure in a very emotional time in her life.

Let things play out and in time she may be able to except the fact she caused her own misery and lost the very thing she needs and wants in her life........

Someone who loves her for herself.

Answer 8

she's an idiot! look some women are just fruity and don't know what they want. i left my husband too. however there were multiple reasons behind it the main one was i didn't feel like his wife. i never did. more like a room mate with benefits. he came and went as he pleased and my son and i maybe got to see him 10-12 hrs a week. so after counseling and many talks to see if it would change i left. truth be told when he met his current fiance two months after i left i was a little jealous. for no good reason i was. i never told him or took it out on him but i was. your lady sounds like you've done something to offend her. however she also sounds like she has a severe issue with self control. maybe she's trying to pull a "if i can't be happy neither can you" thing. hard to say but good luck and hope the divorce goes better for you.

Answer 9

Because you never gave her the one thing that she really wanted and that was a real piece of YOU. When she said she wanted a divorce it wasn't necessarily from you but from a marriage with a complacent guy like you. This woman does not sound like she is all that wonderful, so maybe you should let this one go, but for the next time. try giving of yourself, don't just BE THERE in the room with someone, REALLY BE THERE, give a piece of your self and be a part of the relationship give a piece of your self.

Answer 10

She sounds bipolar and paranoid with distorted thinking and unbalanced. Could be she she needs medical attention? Maybe she imagines things that don't exsist. Mood swings ....being happy one minute and unhappy the next.Something is very wrong with her personality .........mental problems. You didn't say her age .....if over 40 menopause mixed in with it. did you ever take her to marriage counseling or to a doctor for blood work? You never know because something doesn't seem right here. Good luck and take care.

Answer 11

She has issues and obviously unstable and insecure. Ignore her. People like that will do anything to justify their underhanded actions. No matter what she does, you will always be the bad guy, so she feels better about herself. Its called narcissism. Let her run her mouth, and don't stoop to her level or do anything that anyone else could mistake for negative actions on your part. Anyone who knows you, will know that what she says isn't true.