I need some good advice please!!?

Question

I left my husband cause he is a acholic and we have 2 daughters together. I just could not take it anymore. I am living at home with my parents and lets just say it is not working out. I cannot get along with my mother and I just feel like there is no hope. I am 27 and I don't have any education and I am just really stuck. I can't leave my parents house cause I have nowhere to go with my daughters. I was depressed with my husaband and now I have all these new problems on my hands. Anyone have any good advice for me to get back on my feet with 2 kids and no education and no money to do anything. Thanks so much!

Answer 1

Do you mean you don't have a college degree or that you didn't graduate from HS? If it's the first there are ton of jobs you can do that don't require a degree. They won't be the most high paying but right now you need to save up money and then make some decisions about your marriage. You can also start looking for a place to live that you can afford for the girls alone while you wait on any child support issue to be resolved. You can go back to school once you are in your own place and you and your girls are settled if you choose.

If you meant the second then honey please find a place to complete your GED and then start with an entry level job and get on your own feet.

Answer 2

Jennifer -

First of all I must say that I really feel for your situation. I understand how hard your life must seem right now. But please hang in there. Let me start with this...

If you can talk with your parents reasonably try to put a plan together. Look at your community college for short term educational opportunities that will give you a career and allow you to get on your feet. I'm sure that your parents want the best for you and their grandchildren. I'm sure that your parents are stressed about your future and that of the children just as you are. If you can pull a plan together that shows some light at the end of the tunnel everyone will step down the stress level a couple of levels.

Talk with your friends. Go to the community job center. Assemble a plan. Right now all of the burdens of life are on your shoulders and you lack direction. If you know exactly what you're aiming at you feel 100% better.

I hope this helps... Take care.

Answer 3

Look you actually are ok, I know that may seem crazy but you are. Your safe, your daughters are safe and you have a roof over your head. Yes it's an inconvenience to you and your parents because they are used to their own space and with you coming back they need time to adjust. I commend you on leaving you husband, I know how hard that can be. Now it's time to get everything back in order. Take everything one at a time don't try to conquer ever problem at the same time. You are 27 sit down and think of what you need to do to support your kids, get a job (doesn't have to be a great one at first) enroll in school and think about this before you say no two years will pass regardless it might as well pass with you doing better for yourself and the children. While your at your parents home you may have to be a bit humble during that time just to keep the peace but think about it, this will not be forever. Hope this helps.

Answer 4

i say you should try to get a job i mean even if you have no education there are some jobs out there that will hire but imean the best thing to do is to get a job soo you can start getting money an maybe apply for a low income house or apartment so that way you can have your own place and not have to worry about your mother. you got to be independent sometimes because a man can come an go but your daughters they need you more then ever so its up to you to get your self out there and start looking. and also you can get welfare too that can help you and after the dad will have to pay later on. a little somethin helps

Answer 5

For someone to be alcoholic there must be something that he might be running away from, something that bothers him, or basically something that caused him to adopt this kind of behavior. Was he alcoholic when you married him at first? Do you still love him? Have you sort marriage counseling together? Have you ever talked to him about his problem that bothers him and find a solution. Is he abusive husband except being alcoholic which is abusive to his kids? I believe your husband would change, and the best way is to let your mother keep your kids and take necessary steps to help your husband overcome his problems. I believe he would change and love his family. It only a matter of short time before he realize his wrongdoing.
secondly, it depends on your location to get help with a job. see your local family relief centers for assistance or work force centers in your area or ministry of labor for job listing.,

Answer 6

Go to the local welfare office and file for aide. Then find the low income apartments and put your name on the list. Get medical for your daughters and food stamps and then move out as soon as you get a place.

Call Alcoholics Anonymous and ask them to direct you to the nearest Ala-non meeting. The meetings are free and they have the best help for you having had an alcoholic in your life. You need to learn everything you can about alcoholism and co dependency.

Call your local college and find out about financial aide for furthering your education. Inquire with the welfare department, for aide to pay for child care while, you look for work and attend college.

You can do this, you are not stuck. You won't have to stay on aide forever, just long enough to get on your feet. That's what it is there for, to help you get started. I hope the best for you, don't put off going to Ala-non, your alcoholic has effected you far more than you may have imagined. Your daughters may benefit from counseling about the whole mess, so inquire about that too.

Answer 7

You first need to give yourself a pat on the back for getting out of the situation; your girls need to be in a healthy and safe enviroment and you did what's best for them, so you need to give yourself snaps for that. As for the whole situation with your parents, if you can try to stay as long as you can. Try to find a job maybe as a secretary or an assistant and try to take some community college classes to actually follow your dreams, It may not seem like the easist solution but its an idea. You need to still always think positive though, you sound like a smart lady for leaving your husband. There is hope and things will get better. I promise.

Answer 8

You want good advice, you got it...but I won't candy coat it.

So Hey, you picked him. Then had not one, but two kids with him. You made your bed, now lay in it. Or, suck it up, stay with your Mother, and get yourself to school. If you need a GED start there. Then find the nearest Tech, or community college and take classes one or two at a time, while you work part time to pay for it. Some single moms work two jobs, and still go to school. Where there's a will there's a way. Your parents are helping you out, try being grateful for their help. OR, go back to the jerk you married, and make it work.

Answer 9

Look into jobs at child care centers. Some will let you bring your kids to work with you. This would enable you to earn income to support yourself and kids and not have to worry about your kids. Just a thought. Don't give up - you will find your way out of it; it might not seem like it now, but you will. I truly believe that God never gives us more than we can handle - if he did, we'd be dead. That's my motto when life gets most brutal. Hang in their -

Answer 10

My advice is to make the most of what you have. If you want to get somewhere in life, you need to go back to school while your parents take care of the kids. after school is over, you'll have a better career, save money for a place of your own. sue your ex for child support to help with the kids. good luck