Take my hand and lead me to your heart.
I want to feel your dreams that shine light in the dark.
Your smile caresses my soul and makes my life complete.
Your love has changed the way I feel; I am no longer me.
You have made me a follower in your angel parade.
You have given me wings to fly through each day.
I imagine us together for the rest of our lives.
We have so many memories and so many happy times.
To feel this way is something new.
I give my world, my life, and my heart to you.
I will never break a promise; I intend to keep all.
If you are ever in need I will not let you fall.
The truth of the matter is that I love you.
Forever and always my love will be true.
It's for my BF :)
2007-08-04 14:46:13 · 14 answers · asked by Susan 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
That is a really good poem!!
2007-08-04 14:50:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is written from the heart. It needs work on it, you lost your way a little; Perhaps delete We have so many memories and so many happy times. Take the sentence up to the beginning of the poem. There are free poetry sites on the web where you can express yourself; well done. Good for you from a Poetry Fellow of Poetry.com.
2007-08-04 21:55:24 · answer #2 · answered by Windsong 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's for your boyfriend, he'll love it...because he loves you. Anytime you speak from the heart, your voice will be heard by those who listen. One word of advice: don't overdue the poems for your boyfriend. If you give him one poem, he'll love it...if you start showering him with poems, he'll grow uncomfortable and might not tell you until it's too late. However, if it's just the one...don't worry, it's a nice poem.
If you want feedback/critique, that will be a completely different story...so I'd recommend you give it to him as it is now...don't worry about editing unless you're going to enter it in a contest or continue to edit it for quite some time. Your lines are okay, but they are not new. They work for lovers, but not for critics who'll say it's cliche, tired, old hat, etc. Don't show your love letters to critics, don't show your love poems to them either, just give them to the people for whom they were written.
good luck and keep writing
2007-08-05 03:02:41 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Right, it's for your BF, how could we not have guessed?
It's ok for where you are in your life. Typical of middle school. Not so good if you are in high school.
What I've said doesn't take away from your feelings that have been expressed. It's just not poetic. Your feelings are your feelings, neither right nor wrong and nobody can take them away from you. But to call this a poem? No.
2007-08-04 22:03:16 · answer #4 · answered by margot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't like it - I love it.
It actually made me cry as I'm having a hard time letting go of a relationship that I know is never going to work out - and this poem really says exactly how I feel about him.
Thank you.
2007-08-04 21:56:20 · answer #5 · answered by Scrapper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really need to know how long and how much time did you put into this poem plsssssssss, i would give u 8/10 sstars ur great,,,pls if i would come up with something like this it takes me a week. so how long did it take u? ans me pls ?
premed09_luc@yahoo.com
2007-08-04 23:08:07 · answer #6 · answered by aaa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I LIKE it. I like the idea of an angel parade. Talented great poem.
2007-08-04 21:50:41 · answer #7 · answered by birnw2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not your poem.... Someone else wrote that to their fiance' the dude posted a link
2007-08-05 00:50:24 · answer #8 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love this poem!! Its funny because like two days ago I wrote a poem to my best friand too! I hope she likes it because I sure do... :)
2007-08-04 21:55:03 · answer #9 · answered by lil_maximus 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweet, very romantic!
2007-08-04 21:50:58 · answer #10 · answered by J. A. M. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋