Ok, I did something stupid. I haven't seen my 1st love since we broke up and it's been over 10 years. I started having dreams about him---that he wasn't ok. So I found his address on the net and wrote to him all the feelings I ever felt about him. Yes, I poured out my heart.
...only to find that he's now married and has kids. The wife wrote back to me and call me all sorts of names and now my ex hates me too. Basically, I was hated for showing my true feelings that he obviously doesn't give a damn about anymore.
At one point, I was really worried that he might be dead (due to the dreams I was having) so I thought I find him to tell him how I really felt before anything happened to me or him.
2007-08-04 13:20:18 · 4 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He could have handled it differently. He could have told you he had a wife but thanks anyway. Don't feel bad. Instead, move on.
2007-08-04 13:35:18 · answer #1 · answered by S S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What they feel is because they don't understand. They didn't know that you didn't know he was married. The important thing is to NOT hate yourself! What his wife did was very wrong, but she is probably very intimidated that another woman loves her husband in possibly the same way that she does, and that is a very intimate, personal way to feel. I wouldn't take anything she said too seriously, because people will explode if they believe that thier world and family is threatened. How would you feel if you were his wife, and found such an email to your husband? She's protecting her family like a tiger. It's not that they hate you. This may hurt you because you didn't know he'd moved on to the point of marriage, and you must now move on yourself. I'm so sorry about the way you feel!! Don't hate yourself. You are not a bad person-k? So don't bring it down on yourself.
2007-08-04 20:35:12 · answer #2 · answered by lvsakki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all make mistakes. The wife was probably afraid of you and attempting to protect her marriage, that anger probably wasn't hatred. Same for him. He has a very large emotional investment in his happy marriage, and doesn't want you mucking it up. You were a little too direct. You should have investigated a little about him and tried to get re-acquainted before you expressed your fantasies. Life is a process of living and learning. Don't sweat it.
2007-08-04 20:44:57 · answer #3 · answered by Bibs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow ok then. well that sucks is all i gotta tell you, but i wouldnt hate you. Its not your fault you didnt know he had kids or a freakish wife. I wouldnt hate myself its not ur fault. All you did was write down ur feelings that wasnt ment for her to see. And by the way if she calls u names, dont u think she a total evil *****. Niot exactly the wife i would marry if i was a guy.
2007-08-04 20:26:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋