I grew up without a family mostly, segregated from others of the familys I was with. Forced into situations I didn't wish to be part of and talked down to by people who thought of me as trash. Those same people today love me after they grew up a bit. But, I am a product of that enviroment. On top of that my most fufilling/long relationship in my life is also my most unappetizing. I did everything I could to be their friend, but they insulted me by calling me selfish and rude. They said they never loved me, or they did but it wasn't for long. So now the happy memorys I do have aren't all too eventful in my mind and I'm almost anxiety stricin in hurt from her words. All's I have in my life are people who don't keep their word and hurt normally. I've never had anyone there who wanted to be there... How can I really ever find someone when I don't know what I'm looking for in the first place?... P.S .. if anyone mentions god I'm going to slap you... thats not a valid answer.
2007-08-04 11:54:49 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thank you for the answers so far, I just can't understand how your best friend can do that to you. Then jump into someone elses arms while your still in the way... then claim the new guy a better relationship, then openly say they where wrong... then come back and call you names and say they're happier now...
2007-08-04 12:14:05 · update #1
I'm actually shakey right now, more so than normal. And my nerves feel shot... its been months but I can't let it pass it seems...
2007-08-04 12:14:36 · update #2
Btw freedom, your honesty gets you on my good side. I just get tired of hearing generic bible verses to ungeneric problems. I know theres some hope in a god-led healing process, you ask for help.. you normally get some. But I need to deal with things on my own, and I don't need scripture....
2007-08-04 12:18:20 · update #3
First let me say that I am sorry that life has been so hard on you.
I think you said something very important, which is you're not sure what you want. Since you understand that you don't know what you are looking for, maybe it's time to evaluate what kinds of relationships have made you feel the most complete. Make a list if you have to of all the wonderful things that have made you feel valued, and perhaps even a list of things that made you feel degraded. Look for those values in others and just maybe you'll find what you were looking for to live a happy ever after.
Best wishes.
2007-08-04 12:00:25 · answer #1 · answered by StarGazer 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people grew up in not so good circumstances. Let your up bringing tell you how not to treat people. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Stop being a victim and become a survivor. You can't change the past, so just work on right now. Happiness is a decision, not really a gift from others. So start working on your own happiness, stop waiting for someone else to make you happy. Do good things and treat others very well and you will be a lot happier.
The people who treat you badly, you can leave behind. You will find someone who will be good to you, you know that is what you really want.
You say don't mention God, but you don't understand that God is Love. When no one else loves you, you should know that He does. You really need Him in your life, so I hope you will find Him.
2007-08-04 19:23:07 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In today's world we all want to be loved and needed. People thrive on different things, but being needed is one of the most fulfilling. You will find that people are too busy with their own lives to be counted on, there are few people who will always follow through, so for you to count on people is inevitably going to fail. You want love, respect, kindness, attention and affection, and to feel good. There is one way you can accomplish this. Volunteer somewhere and offer help to those who need it, give a helping hand to a neighbor a friend. The one thing you must do though is to NOT expect anything in return, perhaps a thank you, maybe not even that. You will be surprised at how much satisfaction this will bring to your life, and in return you will feel worthy and good. As you continue you will find that this way of giving also means people need you, and there is your second gift. Sometimes you will get a smile, a hug or a thank you, there is your next gift. Slowly, you will get out of that slump you are in, and people will like you for who you are, which in return gives you acquaintances and maybe even friends. You will radiate pleasant vibes and people will notice. And sometime in the future when you least expect it, that special someone will notice and you will have love as well. But love can also come from every walk of life and people that you least expect.
2007-08-04 19:19:42 · answer #3 · answered by dear_vern 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all let me say that i am sorry that things were not right for you when you were growing up.you must find someone to talk to,and get rid of all this baggage that you are carrying around with you.the people that hurt you were cruel to treat you in any way that made you unhappy. also get away from these people now. try and make new friends , i hope things will work out for you.you are hurting so much at this time. tell yourself every day that you are special and demand respect from others.the people that treated you badly are the ones with the problems
2007-08-04 19:19:25 · answer #4 · answered by champagne 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The precursor to healing is rest. You must take time off, stop looking.
2007-08-04 19:00:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well then I consider myself slapped.
2007-08-04 19:00:03 · answer #6 · answered by *Freedom* 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
therapy! it really works wonders. you can find yourself and put thinds into perspective. it helped me so much!
2007-08-04 18:58:32 · answer #7 · answered by eb 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋