Why to have so many children, instead of adopting some?

Question

This belongs here in this category, as there are so many children living in terrible conditions that would benefit from a family that want to have an extended family. This question comes to me after reading this:

http://www.onenewsnow.com/2007/08/arkansas_couple_welcomes_17th.php

Perhaps some will ask what I am doing about this myself (and it would be a good question).
I can't take care of a child right now, but I have adopted an African girl through a program where by an amount of money a month, pays for her education and other basic things.

Answer 1

Because most people have children for selfish reasons (not that there is anything wrong with it), they want to see a part of themselves in the child, get personal confirmation etc. I'm planning to have foster children very soon, because I love children and I love helping others...I'm sure I will love the children as much as I would have loved my own kids, if I had any.

It is interesting how there is a license/permit required to do most things, but everybody is allowed to bring children into this world. Reproducing seems to be the easiest thing to do, yet it requires the most responsiblity of anything I can think of.

Answer 2

Many people choose to adopt, even if they have biological children. Those who become foster parents sometimes adopt the foster child, who then fits right in with the rest of the family. Or a divorced or widowed woman with children, meets a man who also is a single parent, and they combine families very successfully. I agree that there are many needy children who would benefit greatly from a good home with loving adoptive parents, and people who are childless or can't have children of their own, often go that route.

I commend you heartily for adopting the African girl through the program. And even though you can't be close to her physically, she is getting the benefit not only of your funds, but of your loving concern for her welfare. I hope someday the two of you can meet. Good luck, and God bless!

Answer 3

I think quite a few people are suffering from massive doses of "do as I say, not as I do, and I won't pay for a darn thing, either". They say every child should be wanted, yet they don't want to do anything to make sure children are fed, clothed, sheltered, and nurtured. I don't care how much of my tax dollars are spent on school lunches, children's health care, and education for children, but the same people who want us all to have kids, don't seem to give a darn about kids once they need money spent on them.

I choose not to have kids since I grew up in a sick family system and didn't want to pass on the genes or the "family" system I had. I also decided not to adopt, foster, or be a big sister, for the same reason, I didn't know how long I could be a good parent one-on-one; it's one thing to think you've got all the crud out of your system, it's another to take the risk with a child's well-being.

I think it's ironic how the anti-birth control and anti-choice people want all of us to have kids non-stop, but if any of us are poor, they could give a sweet jesus what happens to those kids once they are out of the womb. They don't seem to care if people are having kids they don't want, or are mistreating them, or throwing them away in garbage cans.

Yep, in the US, every child is a wanted child, until they're born.

Answer 4

Because it's much easier to have your own children than it is to go through mountains of paper work to adopt a child. Couples when they get married dream of having their own children, not of raising someone else's offspring. I guess unless you work with children in group homes and orphanages you really don't think about those kids. I know some of them want real homes. When I get married, yeah I'm going to want some of my own children, but I also want to adopt some as well. I think I would want every child to experience living in a real home like I have.

Answer 5

The process of pregnancy and childbirth is much easier than adoption. Women desire the connection you have when you carry a child. And then it is born and it has your eyes, or daddys ears. That creates an instant bond. In my opinion i think some women also do not adopt because they are afraid they may not be able to connect with a child that they did not create themselves.

Answer 6

Seventeen children is a LOT of children. Hopefully, that family has adequate resources to support them, although, I cannot imagine how that many children could possibly have adequate individualized nurturing. Even adopting that many children does not seem like a good idea in regards to quality of parent-child relationship. Kudos to you for your contributions to a needy child.

Answer 7

Well, I don't see myself raising a huge brood, but I like the thought that my genetic descendants will still be walking around after I'm gone. It gives me a connection to something that will outlive me. I would personally prefer to raise children that are actually mine. I suspect many people feel something similar.

I don't know what their motivations are.

Answer 8

What is most hilarious of all is that her husband's name is Jim Bob.

Ahem,

Anyway, I think these people are hardcore Christians who don't believe in birth control - there's an actual movement called "Quiverfull." I'm not sure if they're part of it, but it sure seems like it.

They're clearly f'ckin crazy (and how do they survive? She doesn't work), but what people decide to do with their uteruses is entirely up to them, so it's not really any of our business.

Answer 9

A bird in hand or a bird who knows what?