It is named 'WHAT CAN A LITTLE LAD DO'
What can a little lad do?
For his country and for u?
He can keep his good name,
He can play a straight game,
That's one good thing he can do.
From the days of his youth,
He can abide by the truth,
That's another good thing he can do.
He can fight the good fight,
And stand for what is right,
That's one brave thing he can do.
He can spend a moment in prayer,
He can learn to love and to care,
And that's the best thing he can do.
HOW IS IT?
Thanks for reading!
2007-08-03 21:15:36 · 12 answers · asked by sweetgirl1 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
I think your latest poem is commendable. You have inspired me to take up writing poetry again. which i had abandoned many years ago. I hope you continue with your poetry as it can only get better as you become more experienced at it.
2007-08-04 02:23:11 · answer #1 · answered by Jason M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a nice poem, it has a good start. Needs some editing though. First, please spell out "you"...it's "you", not "u". The first two stanzas are otherwise fine. In the fourth stanza it would better to say "it's" than "it is" because it makes the beats more consistent. I'd also suggest "that's a really brave thing he can do" instead of "that's one brave thing..." The final stanza has the most problem. The first line is a little long, but you could balance it out by shortening the second line to "Learn to love and to care" and make the last line "And that's the best that anyone can do"
As far as Anthony C's comment on war...I'd remind him that we lost more US Citizens in the "civil war" (waged entirely on US soil) than in all the other wars this country has fought combined. "Think" before you speak, "know" before you claim.
nice poem, edit and keep writing
2007-08-04 22:21:34 · answer #2 · answered by Kevin S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice poem...but I don't like the subject. War! Dying in war won't do anything but give pain to his family and please the country. Have you ever wondered why no battlegrounds take place in the U.S.? Everyone dies and gets hurt in other countries! We Americans don't understand what it's like to have a battleground in our own country. This is simply unfair!
2007-08-04 08:53:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anthony C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its nice. Its like reading about a kid fighting the US.
2007-08-04 04:26:33 · answer #4 · answered by Pr0d!gY 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is nicely written my dear
and even i like the flow of the lines to come up as a poem
good trying
2007-08-04 10:02:09 · answer #5 · answered by neha t 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U're great. With such thinking u'll definitely be a great poet whom people will really admire. All the best!
2007-08-04 05:40:30 · answer #6 · answered by Mel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like the idea and it is sweet.
If you play with it a little longer the cadence could be improved.
2007-08-04 04:21:49 · answer #7 · answered by lovesong 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like it, it's easy to read and has a nice flow to it if that makes any sense.
2007-08-04 04:18:48 · answer #8 · answered by Matthew Penny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reading it
It need some grid
Work on it
and don't quit
2007-08-04 04:28:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i like that it shows that humanity starts with one person. the choices we make define who we are.
2007-08-04 04:21:31 · answer #10 · answered by justr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋