With kids and all the work around the house I am sometimes not intrested in sex is this bad?
2007-08-03 10:54:28 · 27 answers · asked by cheetos 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you should always make time in your life for sex, It isnt a job, a chore, or something that is on a to do list. You should set aside time for you and your husband. You had time together before the children you should continue the time after children. Put the kids to bed 30 min early, make sure they are good and asleep. Dont worrie about the laundry or the dishes they will be there tomorrow! Take your man to bed and give him a nice massage, always make time for US even if you are tired. Because in a years time there will be no US time and your marriage will be drowning and you wont be able to save it.
With that said at LEAST 2-3x a week.
2007-08-03 11:10:10 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When my husband and I dated, we did nto see each other all the time, but when we did, we had sex. When we got married, we were having sex every night. But, slowly we backed off, to 1 or 2 times a week, but always on the weekends. My husband's job is physical and my job is more on the mental front of things. Now, we realize that we are both tired at the end of the day, so we have slowed a little in that department. But, when we get together, it is always worth it.
Just so you know, this is our second marriage and the kids are grown. So we are not in our 20's. I totally see where you are coming from though.
2007-08-03 11:12:42 · answer #2 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's bad my wife is the same way! I work 12 hour days and no matter how tired I will always make time for making love with my wife. She would rather sleep...not cause it isn't good cause she says it's great but she's just tired. It's not good for a marriage, the man will start to look else where...sorry but men need sex. It's like breathing we need it to survive!! I would say 2-3 times a week would be normal...Great!! Trust me though we do understand you work hard and taking care of the kids is exhausting but WE STILL NEED SEX!! And so do you it should relax you and make you feel good to...if done right!!
2007-08-03 11:36:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normal, I think, is whatever works for you and your spouse. With small children at home, my husband and I had no time and little energy for sex then. We were lucky if we had sex once every 10 days. Now that the kids are older and doing their own things it's more like every few days. You need to keep the intimacy you and your partner have with one another even if it isn't thru sex, but thru talking and connecting in other ways, doing things together. If you can find a reliable sitter, plan a date night once in a while. The rest will follow when the time is right, but you don't want to grow apart during this "dry" spell.
2007-08-03 11:00:36 · answer #4 · answered by mab5096 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends...in your situation alot of women feel just like you it's so over welming that your physically and mental drain and sex is the last thing on your mind..been there done that ..got a couple T-shirts too.The only bad thing is you really should try and find a baby sitter and MAKE time for you and your husband... if at all possible keep it a surprise. Get some rest,get rid of the kids for at least one night,buy something reeeeally sexy and surprise your husband and dont keep it in the bedroom you 've got hte whole house to your selves,do something to him you've never done before but always wanted to try. What do you have to gain? Maybe more than you know?HeHe...naughty naughty
2007-08-03 12:00:12 · answer #5 · answered by sweetness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as BOTH of you are satisfied with it then anything is ok.
You can have some intimicy without sex by touching or cuddling . If your husband is not happy and goes looking elsewhere then you have a problem.
You might get your doctor to check that your hormone levels are where they should be . Some women lose interest because there hormone levels never came back to normal after a pregnancy.
2007-08-03 11:13:25 · answer #6 · answered by mark 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is no magic number, but both you and your husband need to be meeting each other's needs. That's most important. Take time out just for each other, whether it's to have sex, or spend some quality alone time together.
Yes, it is totally normal to be tired w/ all that goes on in life. But, that will always be there, so don't forget about how important your husband's needs are. He needs to remember the same thing, and that you can't/don't want to do it every night.
2007-08-03 11:03:28 · answer #7 · answered by Dj 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You feel how you feel. No one can really say how much sex is normal in a marriage except those involved in that particular marriage. Maybe you need to talk to your doctor - when you have kids, sometimes your hormones go nutty and you lose interest in sex. (Thankfully, this hasn't happened to me but I have friends who it has happened to). Nothing to be ashamed of. Good luck finding a balance!
2007-08-03 11:03:04 · answer #8 · answered by Empress1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I find it amusing that most on here feel that a woman has to "meet the needs of her husband". Well she cleans his house, raises his children, cooks his meals. Those needs are met. Where is it written that a woman has to have sex with her husband, when she is not in the mood. That's nothing short of being violated. It's your body, you call the shots. Otherwise, when you are not in the mood, it's just another chore to be taken care of.
2007-08-03 11:26:20 · answer #9 · answered by janice 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
normal ranges from twice a day to none ever. Unfortunately, some of us are in the never category.
It is rarely the male in the relationship that is not interested. Interestingly, the ones holding the power also get all the money in the inevitable divorce. Tragic but true.
No doubt about it, men may be smart, but women are smarter.
2007-08-03 11:05:23 · answer #10 · answered by Izzy F 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋