How can a young, childless woman get her tubes tied?

Question

Please don't criticize me for this. Most clinics and doctors I asked said that you had to be over 30 and have had kids for them to even consider sterilizing you. I felt this was wrong- I understand why some people would want to keep a woman from getting an abortion, but to keep them from making sure they don't get pregnant in the first place? That's rather asinine.

I'm sure I never want to become pregnant in my life (see no benefit from it, here or in the future) and have felt this way all my life. How can a woman under 30 with no children ensure she gets the operation?

On changing my mind- really. My reasons for not having children are numerous and well thought-out. I'd rather help at-risk children and spread my love to existing people. :D

Answer 1

Yes you can. The term is “Childfree”, not “Childless”. A person whom is “Childfree” has thought out the pros and cons, and decided for his or herself that he or she is not having children.

One in five women in the USA feel the same as you do, but they usually don't know it until thier 30's.

People will be negative toward you. They will force their own brand of ethics on you. They do this because they don’t understand how strongly some of us do not want to have any children. I get served, “You will burn in Hell if you don’t have children!” and “You will regret not having children!” at least once a month or so. I usually respond with, “I’d rather regret not having children, than regret having them like you do!”.

Many of my friends will never admit, in public, that having children was a mistake. In private they will admit that I did the right thing.

I had a vasectomy when I was 21, and I never had children. My girlfriend got her tubes tied in her 20’s, and never had children. This was long before we ever met.

There are no laws that set the minimum age, or the number of children. It is up to the clinic or doctors. Many will force their own brand of ethics on you. That is policy not law. Just go to a different clinic. You will find one that will do yours. It took me three tries to find the right clinic. My girlfriend got hers done on the first try.

That was 20 years ago, and I still thank my lucky stars that I made that choice!

Answer 2

I am not sure if you will be able to find a doctor that will do that procedure until you're older but I do understand where you are coming from. I am 25, have never had children and never plan to. One of the most aggravating things to deal with is listening to people tell you, "Oh you'll change your mind someday". Many people don't understand that for some people, not wanting children can be the same as someone who has always wanted children. Just because we have the ability to have children doesn't mean that we should automatically want to. Try telling someone who has always wanted children that "oh you might change your mind someday" and they will look at you like you are crazy! (This of course has been from my personal experience. I'm not claiming that everyone is like this.)

That said, I was unable to find a doctor who would consider a tubal ligation but I found plenty that recommended IUDs and that's what I got 3 weeks ago. I have the Mirena. I did experience a tremendous amount of pain the first 2 days but now it is gone and I love it! It's not for everyone but you should look into it.

Answer 3

I think there's very little chance of you finding a doctor that will perform a semi-permanent procedure on a woman that has not had children and is unmarried. While I know this isn't what you want to hear, just because you don't want children now, doesn't mean that you won't by the time you're, say, 35. I'm married, only 19, and never think I want children. However, I am aware that I am still young and my mind may change as I get older and my situation changes. Even if you see no benefit now, you may regret such a permanent decision later in life.

Why don't you try some other form of birth control, like an IUD, that is long-lasting? The non-hormonal IUD, ParaGard, is just as effective as hormonal methods and can be left in your uterus for up to 12 years. There's also the hormonal IUD, which lasts 7 years, and the implant, Implanon, which lasts 3-5 years.

It will still be difficult to find a doctor willing to insert an IUD into a woman that is not married, young, and has not had children, because insertion will be a bit more painful and there is a slightly greater chance of the IUD being expelled, but it will be much easier than trying to find a doctor to perform a tubal ligation.

EDIT: Regardless of how "well thought out" your reasons are, it's not going to change the fact that you're not going to find a doctor that's going to be willing to perform a tubal ligation on a young, unmarried, childless woman.

How can you think that it's not even a possibility that your mind will NEVER change?

Answer 4

I completely agree with you. Although I do think there should be an age, it shouldn't be 30. More like 20. And although I have children that I love more than life itself I know the reasons you don't want children and I'm sure most of them are the only reasons I would take my children back. I mean just look at the world today, just imagine how it's going to be in 15 years from now.

Answer 5

You might have to wait until you are old enough to where the doctors in your area will do this.

But someone else on here brought up a good point. You might change your mind.

I was just like you. Never had any desire to have children. I had my reasons as well, very well thought out. I had my career path, etc. to focus on. I also figured if I wanted to help with children, I could help with nieces or nephews or volunteering, etc.

But as I've become a bit older, now I'm second guessing it. Now I'm thinking about the possibility of having children and how that actually sounds somewhat appealing now.

So even though you really want that now, you never know, you might just change your mind later.

Answer 6

I dont criticize you. I tried the same thing and they said I had to be atleast 21 with 2 kids. or 30 with one. I dont know if they were bullshitting me b/c I was young (I was only 18) or what. but they wouldnt tie me off. I dont want kids. my reasons are well thought out as well, and my choice still hasn't changed now that i'm 21. but I can understand why they would turn away an 18 yr old. in there eyes they saw a crazy teenager. Hopefully u will be able to find a physician who will do it.

Answer 7

I had a vasectomy when I was 19... that "wait til you're 30" is probably psychological advice, but there may be medical reasons too... I do not know...

And if doctors would refuse to do it, then that's just sexism... when I had my vasectomy, they did ask me to wait and "think about it" for 6 months, and I did... but it was a little frustrating, as I had thought about it for 18 months before that... but I guess they were trying to protect what they may have thought of as a rash impulsive 19-year-old decision...



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Answer 8

I dated several women that had thier tubes tied in thier 20's, and have no children. I think you just have to go from doctor to doctor until you get one that will do it.

Answer 9

not sure where you live but I know up here in Canada
they do it for young women in fact I had two young co-workers had their tubes tied.. I would try another city perhaps for the Dr's there

good luck to you...

Answer 10

you will possibly desire to be waiting to, however the religious suitable in the US is at the instant waging a conflict on women folk. Your rights to abortion, birth control, and so on are being assaulted. call the checklist and ask for one, and in the event that they supply you any crap approximately their religious ideals, supply 'em hell!!