What if you have never had any thought of incest within your adoptive family as you have grown up with them and find the thought repulsive yet when you reunite with birth family you find yourself in a sexual relationship with your biological brother/sister mother/father. You feel like you've known them your whole life yet they are complete strangers to you. Have you or would you act on it? What is your oppinion about this situation?
2007-08-03 04:21:36 · 15 answers · asked by tia 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
In David Brodzinsky's "Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self," he makes an extremely short reference to this... he says this is extremely rare, but that in a few cases, the reunited family members feel such a powerful sense of intimacy with each other AND that they feel they have NO CHOICE except to act on it sexually. He doesn't say anything more about it.
I would say that the feelings of intimacy are normal and understandable, especially in adopted adults who may have come from a background where they have not felt this type of closeness before... however, I would also recommend that the person remembers that there are MANY ways to express intimacy with someone, and sex is only one of them. They do have a CHOICE. In addition, as adults, we should always be thinking of the consequences of our actions. Will this hurt ourselves or other people in the long run? Is it illegal or taboo? How will I feel about this later?
There are many situations that adults face where they might have feelings about something... but do not act on those feelings, for whatever reason... or find another way to express those feelings. My personal opinion is that this situation would fall under this category. I would recommend trying to understand those feelings, writing about them, talking about them, and even seeking supportive and nonjudgmental counseling if needed.
2007-08-03 04:42:55 · answer #1 · answered by thedrisin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe that your feelings are that odd. You have been reunited with a particular group of people that you have been missing in your life, even if on a small scale. There is a place in everyone's heart for their real family. We are taught at birth by whoever is responsible for us that family is very important. Even though you were not with your biological family, you were most likely still taught that family was important. I will bet that you are now experiencing deeper feelings for your biological family because of their obvious absence. But, and here is the key, do not mistake your feelings or your natural bond with your family for anything other than what it actually is, and that is the fact that you were missing them. The fact that you are wanting to bond and get closer proves that you were missing them greatly. I would take great care in how I approached this relationship that you are speaking of. The possibility of destroying it before it has time to naturally occur is great. You may be experiencing feelings that you have never had before for family members, but remember this is your family. A sexual relationship with any family member would not be advisable in any situation. Understand what your true feelings are, and I bet you find that your feelings are not lust, but true love for the family that God created for you.
2007-08-03 04:37:49 · answer #2 · answered by Coach E 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a good one and your going to get a lot of flack about it. I'll tell you what happened to me. I was in Florida while in the service, went to a club with a couple guys. I saw a girl, approached her and started flirting. Things went well and we started seeing each other. About a week later we went to her apartment and were laying in bed playing Kissee face, rubbie poo. I don't remember how the subject was brought up but she mentioned a little town ( 450 people) in Iowa. I laughed, "I have an Uncle and Aunt that live there. (Not the real names) Donald and Debbie Smith, do you know them. Her face went blank, "There my parents". We left the bedroom and had a drink, however I still smile at her when we have family reunions and she smiles back. (were both married now)
2007-08-03 04:38:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are confusing different types of intimacy. It's normal to feel a deep bond w/ reunited family members, but you need to distinguish that bond/love/attraction for family from sexual attraction.
2007-08-03 04:26:04 · answer #4 · answered by Genna Mariebee 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Didn't you ask this a few minutes ago? It's WRONG. No matter how you try to reason it out, it's wrong. They are your BLOOD relations, and it is incest. No ifs, ands or buts. It's wrong. Can't you find someone OUTSIDE of either families to fall in love with?
2007-08-03 04:24:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey, if it was good enough for royalty in the old days, it should be good enough for us peons now. Ive seen that movie taboo. I guess, as long as they are adults, and there are no offspring from the sexual activity, they can do what they want. For myself, I dont even hug my mother, and I find it kinda sick to see my gf's kids kiss her goodnite or whathaveyou on the lips.
2016-05-17 07:39:36 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YUCK
It is still incest
2007-08-03 04:24:47 · answer #7 · answered by Offending Party 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive heard its quite popular in Blackburn UK and Alabama USA
2007-08-03 04:24:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god incest o.o
2007-08-03 04:24:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
incest is wrong. you need help
2007-08-03 04:25:49 · answer #10 · answered by stevesherri 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋