how do you deal with husband telling you you are too fat to have sex with or be seen in public with?

Question

I'm 30lbs overweight and he is 50lbs overweight. how do you get over that comment?

Answer 1

You divorce him. He's only trying to make you feel bad so he can feel better about himself, which from the sounds of it he's no better off than you are. You should re-evaluate your relationship and what you want and how you want to be treated. You deserve better than some prick who will talk to you like that.

Answer 2

Honestly, mine says things like that but I do not think he means it. I am 10 to 15 pounds over weight. It does hurt my feelings but I make a comment back to him. Usually, well look at you, I have to walk fast in the store so people do not think I am with you. Or I tell him, what makes you so great, you have more hair than a wolly mamoth.
One night I did get really upset and started crying, I told him to leave me alone and walked out of the room and locked myself in the bedroom. He slept on the couch that night. Next morning he apoligized and things have been better since.

Answer 3

Instead of crying or being emotional that he hurt you - Call his bluff. Be confident and tell him that is fine with you and to not ask for any sex from now on because he won't get any. And make sure you go out on your own, don't go anywhere with him should he ask. Tell him that you feel the same way about him and his weight, so this would be a good agreement. Then, just for spite, I'd lose weight. He is trying to bully you, and he should have a taste of his own medicine.

Answer 4

That just shows you what kind of husband you married!!! Hes a jurk for emotionally abusing you. THIS IS emotional abuse, just in case you didnt know. You do not deserve to be treated like this. SOOO tell him, if he starts to lose that extra bag that he carries, you will do the same. BUT if he really cared and loved you he would have told you in a different way..Like:
"Baby, I think we both need to start a diet because we have gained a little weight. Not only is it good for our body, but we will feel better..What do you say if we start a diet?"
Thats MUCH better than: "Your fat, you need to loose some weight"...
Talk to him and tell him that you have feelings and that you dont deserve to be treated like this...
Wish you the best!!!!

Answer 5

You need to ask yourself if he is worth it. This is verbal abuse. If he really feels this way about you then, I would drop him like a rock. If he really loves you, I would think he would be willing for both of you to work on this together. Do you think he might be having an affair? If so there are signs to look for that will help you determine if he is having an affair. Check out the link below.

I wonder if he said this to try and motivate you, so you both could work on this together. If he said it out of anger then, I would not take it to heart. We all say things when we are angry and do not mean them. If you want to try and work it out you need to do it together. Team work is always the best. I would ask him this, I want to join a gym and try to work out as often as possible, and see if he wants to go with you.

Wish you the best of luck

Answer 6

Realize he's ignorant and that he has very little respect for you! The next couple of times he trys having sex with you do not give in remind him of what he said and tell him to deal with that! Tell him he is the problem and that him being 50 lbs over weight is much worse then being 30 lbs. over weight. Try hard to not let what his words say hurt you. Be strong and tell yourself that you are not influenced by his words emotionally or physically!

Answer 7

Do something about it!! Men are visual creatures. There is nothing more embarrassing than being seen with a fat woman. Get some surgery and a total make over and then dump him.

Answer 8

Start flaunting what you have to other men and when they start flirting with you hubby will get jealous and appreciate what he has and he will try to be all lovey on you ,but don't give in you turn down his advances for sex a few times and teach his a** a lesson, sometimes you have to show hubby who is the boss.

Answer 9

It's called "Divorce".
If my husband ever said that to me, I would never be able to get over it and I know without a doubt it would eventually lead to a divorce.
That is just totally disrespectful.
You need to be with someone that loves you for who you are on the inside.
I can understand if "you" want to lose the weight and he tries to encourage you.
But for him to make a comment like that, that is just totally insensitive.
I'll bet you would never say anything like that to him, even though he is overweight.

Answer 10

Hello,
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Answer 11

Tell him that if he thinks your so repulsive that maybe he should do something to help you instead of degrading you. Also let him know that you still love him even though he is 50lbs overweight. Kill him with your love, Honey.