I'm 15, and in the past year my best friend has admitted to me that she is anorexic and bulimic. She is about 5'3-5'4 and used to weigh 110 pounds but dropped to about 82. She showed me her stretch marks. It gets really upsetting because whenever we talk, its always about looks and weight and most of the time when I talk to her I feel as if I'm not good enough because I'm not as skinny as her. There are times when I will purge or cut calories for a few days, but I never totally go through with it because I realize that I don't want to live my life that way.
Her parents know about her problem but they aren't doing anything about it. I don't know why. She tells me how they say she's killing herself by not eating and they take away her cell phone as punishment. Sometimes I tell her that she needs help but she just tells me that she will never forgive me if I tell. What do I do? We used to have so much fun and now we have to obsess over weight. I hate it.
2007-08-02 07:09:14 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I realize it's hard and you want to keep your friend's secret, but you would be doing her a huge favor and probably saving her life by either telling a teacher or counsler, or talking to her parents about this. She has a serious illness that needs professional medical treatment...at this point, from the way you describe her...she is past the point where punishment will do any good. Yes, she is killing herself...literally. She may not forgive you, but as her friend I hope you have the courage to do the right thing. Look on the web and find out about treatment centers in your area, you might also find out about the long term effects of anorexia and bulimia so you can have back up.
Good luck!!
2007-08-02 07:17:46 · answer #1 · answered by JEANIEM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can really do is be there for her to talk to. You can't fix this for her. Someone has to convince her that she needs medical and mental help. Otherwise she could destroy herself very easily. I hate to suggest this because I know you're very young and probably think more about the present than the future, but what a true friend would do is blow the whistle to her parents or a trusted adult who will act on it. If she is doing this to herself she isn't going to seek out help on her own. She may hate you for it now, but in the long run you will know you did the right thing. If you really want what's best for her you need to rat her out, even if it means losing her friendship.
2007-08-02 07:17:17 · answer #2 · answered by jwsou812 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Amanda
I think in your heart of hearts you know the answer. That your friend is reallying harming herself. The risks and health issues are just not worth weighing 82 pounds.
I do think that she is not good for you to be around because it is causing you to question yourself about your weight. Loosing weight healthily IF you need to loose weight is one thing but not eat and purge one's self is suicidal.
Your friends parents are not helping her by simply taking away her cell. She needs medical and emotional help.
2007-08-02 07:15:01 · answer #3 · answered by ♥♥The Queen Has Spoken♥♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you really care for her, and watching her hurt herself is painful. Show her that being skinny isn't everything and being healthy is better. Maybe show her pictures of actresses and models that aren't 90 pounds? Hopefully she will think that they are pretty too. Also have her ask other people what they think of her appearance. If a lot of people aren't giving her compliments and saying shes too skinny, then she probably won't try as hard to impress no one.
2007-08-02 07:21:05 · answer #4 · answered by Jane M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get her help. a school counselor, a teacher, your parents, just do it. she might be mad at you at first for telling on her, but in the long run, when she gets healthy again, hopefully she'll realize that you saved her life. even if you two dont stay friends in the end, at least you tried your best and showed her how much you care about her.
remind her how good food is. get ice cream, crepes, shrimp pasta alfredo, krispy kreme donuts, mcdonalds fries.. the list goes on.
2007-08-02 07:17:31 · answer #5 · answered by JIGGLY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know she said that she'll never forgive you if you tell someone, but you gotta. Think, will you ever forgive yourself if something happens to her because of her condition? Seriously she needs help, and since your the only one to be concerned about this, you gotta take action. Tell your parents and ask what you can do to help her. She needs help, and its better if you start sooner than later.
2007-08-02 07:13:31 · answer #6 · answered by Rawr!♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you could suggest to her that you dont really feel comfortable talking about that sort of stuff.
im sure your bodys perfect. dont starve your self, or purge!
if you do feel slightly over weight the best thing to do is eat right, and exercise.
you could bring up a ton of other topics to talk about, not just food, weight, and beauty.
2007-08-02 07:12:55 · answer #7 · answered by Colleen M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should check out the following sites for your friend www.kidcrisis.com/eatingdisorders or www.gurze.com I hope this helps Im not really sure but I hope your friend gets help .....SOON and you should look it up on the internet
2007-08-02 07:25:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you and her both need to sit down and have a serious talk about it because it is not good to starve yourself at all. she needs help and she needs to see a doctor. this is dangerous and it can lead to bad things.
i hope that things get better for the both of you.
2007-08-02 07:17:56 · answer #9 · answered by babii-b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋