How do I clear up this misunderstanding?

Question

Someone, who I consided a friend as well as a coworker, went off on me the other day in the office. This person said some pretty hurtful things to me regarding our friendship. It was said in earshot of my employer. I had wanted to leave the office and go talk about it, because what was implied couldn't have been further from the reality of the situation. This person wouldn't listen and refused to sit down and talk with me about it. If left alone - it will probably mean the end of our friendship and continued stress in the workplace. Do I wait until they are ready and hope they will eventually talk? (Communication has never been strong between us) Do I write them a letter to try to clear up the misunderstandings so they can digest it in their time? How would you handle it?

Answer 1

You can wait until they are ready or try to talk to them when you are ready. I would not force the issue if they are not ready or are not talking when you ask them questions. If you push the issues you may end up loosing a great friendship and having a hard time around the workplace. To be able to keep the workplace friendly and not so stressful and tense do not gossip about this particular person as it might get back to them and then you could have an argument that in the first place could have been avoided. Maybe you can write the letter asking when she is ready to come and talk to you. If she never comes then you can approach her after a few months. If this brings no results you may have lost a good friendship. She should have been nicer to you. Maybe she was going through a stressful time at home and you need to wait until she gets to feeling less stressed out. Or better yet maybe you can invite her out to lunch or dinner and then talk to her there about what you liked and did not like and why you are dissappointed in what she said. Maybe this will work!! Hope this turns out good.

Answer 2

If there has never been strong communication between the two of you, that doesn't sound like a strong friendship. I think you have to simply realize that the person was not that good a friend or they wouldn't have gone off on you, especially at work, so I would simply go about my job and ignore that person as much as I could. That may make them ready to talk but if not, you haven't lost that much.

Answer 3

Sweet Pea it really depends on why she is upset. I mean what made her go off you left that part out. If she is not willing to communicate at this time I think you should respect that and give her the space that is needed. When she is ready to talk than you go to lunch and talk about it, because you want to keep the professionalism in the work place. Good luck and God bless!

Answer 4

As much time as we typically spend in our work environment a day, I'd try to clear it up. I'd have no desire to be uncomfortable or have something like that cause issues in my workplace, where the bulk of my waking hours are spent 5 days a week.

Answer 5

Unfortunately, you can't make someone listen if they don't wish to. A letter might work - it certainly can't hurt at this time.

Otherwise, a small discussion with your employer might be in line. YOu don't want your employer to get the wrong idea about you.

Answer 6

Talk to the face to face tell them that your trying t patch things up and the you were the bigger person to tell them to there face........if u write a letter they will think you dont really care

Answer 7

stay away do not write letters and if you do make copies friendship is not good in the work place

Answer 8

i will clarify my side and if he mean it, will be maintain friend ship. otherwise i will ignore him