What is a nice way to tell your friend that they are...?

Question

...perverted?
I know, I'm judging. I do care for this friend dearly, and I like her for who she is, but there's one thing that keeps putting me in doubt. Whenever I'm on the phone with her, she says all these perverted things (even though we both know she's joking). She always says I have a nice butt, want to kiss me, etc.

She isn't lezbian. Just an outgoing 'pervy' girl.

Talking like this on the phone, I can handle. But I can't stand it when we're outside. She'd randomly yell out "HOW WAS LAST NIGHT?!" to me, and "I want to touch your booooobiez!!".

I mean.. I do tell her how I feel about that, and I've told her that I don't find it funny sometimes. But she just keeps going on.

What is a nice way I could make her stop doing this? (In public, at least).

Answer 1

The first thing that you have to get into your head is that you can't make your perverted friend stop saying inappropriate comments to you. SHE HAS to do it herself. She is ther one who can change your behavior.

I think she likes the reaction you have every time she gets of your nerves. She enjoys the fact that it bothers you. Usually bullies have this attitude, they think it's funny because they laugh at other people and feel offended if people speak up about it.

If this bothers you that much I'd say to her "XX, we've friends for X years and I've told you that you saying XX and XX to me is offensive and I don't like it. I've told you numerous times and you have not respected my wishes and rather have chosen to ignore my feelings. I can't keep on hanging out with you if your behavior doesn't change". THAT will leave the door open for her to either apologize and say "I'm sorry, I didn't realize how much it was affecting you and I won't do it again" OR she'll keep on ignoring you and will say "XX, I want to squeeze your boobies and kiss you". That latter response will be the one for you to decide if you want to continue being her escape goat.

You CAN put an end to this, you can remove yourself form this bad situation OR you can remain in it and keep of sucking it up.

Answer 2

How plenty alcohol does it take to impair your judgment? The regulation will say that one glass according to hour is the shrink for a medium sized guy or woman. Alcohol isn't healthful and the wine it particularly is spoken of in the Bible isn't as solid because of the fact the wine right now. i think of that it particularly is up to your discretion. the only problem is that some human beings will no longer be able to basically have one drink. The physique is the temple of the Holy Spirit, subsequently we ought to continually preserve the temple.

Answer 3

You must drop her immediatedly! She constantly violates your emotional boundaries and values. Obviously she has some issues to deal with, but, you do not have to be involved with them! These people can't "hear" you when you are being "nice". Just use the broken record approach and tell her you find her behaviour demeaning and no longer want contact with her. Say the same thing again and again if you have to. Walk away. There are better people out there.

Answer 4

Calmly explain to her that you do NOT find it funny, playful, tactful, or anything else. Let her know that it is a very serious issue for you, and that if she can not stop the behavior that makes you uncomfortable then you will be forced to stop 'hanging' out with her, and that it will probably affect your friendship. Stress that it isn't a joke and you mean what you say.

Answer 5

If you simply care for this friend, tell her honestly that you find it a bit too much and ask her to stop before she makes you decide to leave her. Ask her once for all in a serious talk, if she continues to push your buttons, tell her you might just have to go on a different path.

Answer 6

Since you've already told her it was bothering you, either she's into you or she's being inconsiderate and thought it funny that you are freaking out. I think this friendship needs a time-out since it's clearly bothering you.

Tell her that, then tell her that although you wanted to remain friends, it's just hard when she keeps annoying you.

Then do yourself a favor and keep away from her.

Answer 7

Maybe she is just doing this to annoy you or just to be funny. I think you could play around back at her and kind of say "you wish you had a piece of this" or something kind of rejecting her.

She has to get the hint, and if she doesn't then you might have to take some drastic action.

Answer 8

Plant a big sloppy one on her and tell her that you are falling in love with her.

She'll back off then. Or maybe she will admit that she does have feelings for you and that she is just hiding behind these sophmoric actions. (You never know!)

Really though, just let her know that her actions are starting to put a strain on your relationship with her, and if she really does care for you, then she will try to stop. But give her time, it's hard just to change the way you act in a single day.

Answer 9

Hi Tara
It sounds like your friend is reaching out for attention
Is everything okay with her at home?
Is she using humor to cover up some secret she can't tell anyone?
Maybe you can slowly let her know she can confide in you and have a heart to heart talk

Answer 10

simply tell her to stop in front of others (which would embrass her) if telling her in private first didn't work. Make her look the fool to start paying attention to her over zealous behavior and hopefully she will calm down.