Attention mommies! When should I have a baby?

Question

I looked at some other people's similar questions, but none were similar situations. I will give you as much detail as I can.

I am 25, my husband is 24. My husband and I have been married 14 months, but together for 8 years. I am finished with college and currently teach first grade. My husband has a great job with a large corporation (I will keep the name for privacy reasons). We currently own our own home. We have just a little credit card debt (less than 5k...we bought new furniture and it isn't all paid off yet). We collectively make around 100K a year and live in the midwest, where the average is much, much less. Average is about 35K. We both have health insurance.

My question is ...when is the right time to have a baby? I have had baby fever lately. My husband and I talk about it a lot, but we just aren't sure if we are ready. I mean, can we afford to make sure our baby has what it needs? Daycare, etc? How did you know you were ready?

I do not plan to quit my job because I have invested so much time and money into my education. I paid for every dime of college myself. Besides, I love my job. I love the kids. I love the vacation time and comfortable hours. I love that I have good insurance that I don't pay for. The school board does. I love teaching, and plan to do so. My district also offers discounted daycare facilities for teachers, but I have not checked into any of that, as I don't have a child yet.

Answer 1

There is no perfect time to have a baby, and it always requires some sacrifice--during and after pregnancy. My husband and I were in a similar situation--both working, making enough, owning our house. We decided shortly after we got married that when it happened, it happened, and we would trust the timing is right. We are expecting our first early next year. We are ecstatic, and still a little scared (are we really ready???). You will know when you are ready because you will be willing to give up the birth control and try. It's a scary day, but it's so exciting when you know your baby is on the way!

Answer 2

It sounds like you are in a good place financially - plus you can always adjust your budget to make it work. The important part is if both of you are emotionally ready. It sounds like you want a baby - does he want one as bad? Are there things you want to get out of your system before having kids (travel, etc)?

Having a baby is a huge adjustment! You can no longer just run to the store or decide to go to a movie that night. You need to plan - you always need to make sure the babies needs are taken care of before your own.

A couple other things on the finances - call around to day care centers to price them out or ask friends in the area what they pay (it varies a ton depending on where you live).

Once you are ready - then just give it a try. Don't stress too much about it for a few months. Hopefully getting pregnant is easy for you - but keep in mind that for some it is a long process. The figure is that 80% of couples get pregnant within a year of trying.

Hope that helps and good luck!

Answer 3

Ur better than most ... the thing is U will never really know when U R ready until it happens. Even when U do become pregnant Ur gonna wonder what kind of mom will U B (all revolves around R U ready?) U R Ready I must say. U R married, U R happy, N Ur stable- perfect loving environment for a child. Best Wishes and Stay Positive, U N Ur Hubby will soon have a little miracle in due time.

Answer 4

My husband and I also live in the Midwest and he makes $45,000 a year and we have three children and are getting along fine, so I would say since you make more than twice that amount you are definitely financially ready for a baby.

Just a few thoughts, though....

If you are making so much, why have you not paid off your credit card debt? It's just $5000 - that's a drop in the bucket compared to your income.

Also, why would you want to have a baby and then turn around and stick him/her in day care? Wouldn't you want to be your baby's caregiver? Baby's are a treasure and a blessing and letting someone else care for them all day is hard for you and for the child. Children need their mommies with them all the time when they are young.

If you are worried about the loss of income if you quit work, please don't! Your husband is making a nice salary, even without yours, and there are costs associated if you choose to continue to work - gas, car expense, lunches, child care, etc. It's not worth it, especially after you become a mother. You will be pulled in too many directions and have too many demands.

A baby's needs are very simple and I think a lot of people are over-anxious about the costs. I went to a great certified midwife and it cost $1900 for prenatal care and delivery - after my insurance paid their portion. For the first year all you need are lots of diapers and onesies and if you are breastfeeding, food is free!

Answer 5

you have everything financially to take care of the baby. diapers formula etc. and if you breast feed that cuts out formula. i'm 23 and i work and go to school but also i spend time with my baby. i mean there aren't alot of hours in the day but any time with your kid is always better than none.
You would have to choose when you want to have this child and other thing to consider is the fact that your going to be out of work for at least two months after the baby is due because most daycares don't accept infants under 6-8weeks.
for a winter baby start conceiving in the spring
for a spring baby start conceiving in the summer
for a fall baby start conceiving in the winter
and for a summer baby for conceiving in the fall

Answer 6

The main reason I'm not having a 3rd is that I don't want to spend all that money on childcare again. I paid $100 per week per kid, for 36 weeks of the year (I'm a teacher, too). Plus the cost of formula, diapers, etc.

That said, it sounds like you can afford it, so go for it! I'd plan to get pregnant RIGHT NOW so that you have the baby in May and get the whole summer off with it. :)

Answer 7

There's no perfect time to start a family. Everyone's needs and stories are different. I'm newlywed, work full-time, working on my Masters degree, and trying to conceive... some people might think I'm insane, but who cares. On an emotional level, hubby and I are so ready to start a family... and to me that's more important.

There's no magic age, income, or anything else. You guys have a roof over your heads, a healthy joint income, health insurance, etc. Now you just have to make up your minds to do it... and then do it.

Good luck.

Answer 8

I'll suggest waiting another 2 or 3 years that gives you and your husband time to enjoy each other.After kids its all over lol

Answer 9

Honestly there never is a PERFECT time to have a baby I would say that how you are doing it sounds like you would do great so start :)

Answer 10

We just decided and it was settled. I figured we weren't getting any younger and things weren't getting any cheaper so we had a baby, and another, and then another. I stayed home until all three were in school (this year). I have no regrets.....