well i have been married for almost 4 years and recently found out that my husband talks bad and ses awefull things behind my back to his friend and his friends girlfriend she tells me everything and the sad part is that i cannot confront him on this because she doesnot want him to know she told me and it is all true because personal things that go on between us are repeated back to me i really dont know what to do about this i feel like exploding on him than pack up and leave but i have a small child and when me and him are alone he always tells me how much he loves me and i look at him and smile but knowing in mt heart what he ses makes me sick to my stomach,, any advice
2007-08-01 14:02:40 · 10 answers · asked by virgogrl007 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well i would confront him but i dont know who to trust i obviousley cant trust either of them i feel betrayed by him i dont really care to much about her but from him i am very dissapointed hurt and very angry
2007-08-01 15:18:37 · update #1
I would view this Tattling girlfriend with some suspicion if I was you. Have you considered the possibility that she is trying to break you two up. Keeping this so called second hand he said thing secret isn't good. Confront him and tell him what she said. Bring everything out into the open and let the cards fall where they may. Your family is more important than some girlfriend of a friend. Good Luck.
2007-08-01 14:08:46 · answer #1 · answered by Praire Crone 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would question the girl's motives. If I were in her position, I don't think I would tell you. The true test is how he treats you. Without her interference, do you feel any different around him? Does he treat you well? If he seems the same, I would distance myself from the girl. I certainly wouldn't confide in her. Keep your antenna up to a degree, and definitely communicate if something is not working for you, but if it's an otherwise healthy relationship, just live your life and enjoy him and your child. The anxiety can and will drive you crazy.
2007-08-01 14:23:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well what constitutes talking bad and seeing awful things?
I would absolutely confront him about it.
You are married to him. Your loyalty to your girlfriend should NOT play a part in this.
He owes you an explaination.
I would confront him. Tell him your girlfriend told you what has been going on.
If he is talking about your relationship with the two of them, then YOU Have a RIGHT to let him know that she is telling you these things.
This is far too much secrecy for a marriage.
2007-08-01 14:08:22 · answer #3 · answered by Sumie 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
watch out for this woman!!!!!!!!!! I had the same thing to happen in my life and I finally found out the truth as to why my husband would talk about me so bad, see he was trying to impress her by putting me down, and I guess she must have fell for it because they carried on a 3 year affair behind my back and her husbands, you dont have any idea how heart broke and stupid i felt , my advice to you is keep your eyes open and watch for signs, oh and by the way does your husband ever talk bad about his friend? thats another clue I had good luck and take care
2007-08-01 18:00:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband does not love you he can't for if he did he would not talk about you or your marriage.Sounds like he is trying to get in go with another female.That's what men do in order to get close to a women,talk about your wife and how you don't love her and you don't get along women fall for that every time and before you know it your husband is having an affair behind your back.
2007-08-01 14:13:55 · answer #5 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to stand up for yourself. If he loves you then he shouldn't be talking trash behind your back all the time. Everyone says bad things every now and then about the people they love, it's just venting but it shouldn't include personal things between the two of you. Remember, your child will learn what they watch you and your husband do.
2007-08-01 14:10:22 · answer #6 · answered by littleone 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What he's doing is rude, disrespectful to you and immature. Yes, you can confront him. It's wrong of your "friend" to tell you these things and then expect you to not deal with it. Your marriage will suffer if you don't discuss this issue with your husband and come to an agreement on what is okay to talk about to friends and what is a private issue between married couples.
2007-08-01 14:10:32 · answer #7 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the first thing you should do is decide: who's more important? your friends? or your relationship with your husband?
if you answer husband, then you need to confront him. obviously this is eating you up inside. and since you care more about him [at this point] than your friends, their opinions shouldn't concern you. communication is the best thing for any relationship. there's a reason that saying is a cliche.
TALK IT OUT! otherwise, you'll go crazy thinking about it everyday.
2007-08-01 14:08:23 · answer #8 · answered by Noga K 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would confront him - just don't tell him your source - or better yet "accidently" catch him talking about you.
2007-08-01 14:07:59 · answer #9 · answered by Zabes 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I DON'T THINK YOU DESERVE A PERSON LIKE THAT!! I WILL LEAVE HIM!!!
2007-08-01 14:12:45 · answer #10 · answered by LOVELY GURL 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋