ok........This is complicated. 4 years ago I was a divorced woman with 2 teen aged boys living at home. I met who I thought was the man of my dreams. I got pregnant. Well, we could not afford to move into a place big enough for 5 people. So my parents, who have nothing. Who struggle every day with bills. My mom who was recovering from cancer, decide to build a 2 bedroom apartment in their garage for us. figuring the 2 older kids could stay put and I would still be able to help Mom everyday. Every penny they had went into this apt. They maxed out 3 major credit cards and refinanced the house. Ok. Boyfriend build alot of it. Along with alot of help. The agreement was $1,000 a mont for the rent. I live on LI by the way that's cheap for a 2 bedroom apt. everything included. He feels he shouldn't have to pay rent. "He built the place" He doesn't understand the bills involved. To get money from him is like pulling teeth from a chicken, Is he right or wrong? Please help
2007-08-01 08:51:57 · 18 answers · asked by Buffy39 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's WRONG! He needs to do what he said he would do. THAT was the agreement, right? He would pay $1000.00 a month? If he doesn't want to pay, he needs to go!
2007-08-01 08:57:36 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough question. I would say that his time is worth something, but not 100% of the rent.
Decide how much time he put into the house, I'm assuming the materials were bought by your parents, ## hours x standard construction wage = his salary for building onto to your parents home.
Take that amount and divide it out over the next year and deduct that from the rent as payment for his salary.
Even though he helped build it, it is your parents property if they want to charge rent then he needs to pay to live there. But at the same time he did build the rooms which added value to your parents home and he should be compensated for that.
2007-08-01 08:59:08 · answer #2 · answered by Scot P 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
His opinion is his opinion and he is allowed to have his opinion. Don't try to right or wrong it. You made an agreement, and if he didn't agree with it he should have spoken up then. You saved money by not getting a place of your own, and it sounds like more than $1000. Point out to him the difference is yours free and clear and that is his "pay" for helping build it. -- calculate the hours he put into it and congratulate him on the extra he will make if you stay beyond what he would have earned had he been earning money instead of building in their garage.
2007-08-01 08:59:45 · answer #3 · answered by mj69catz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's wrong if he was involved in the decision-making process in the first place (which it seems he was since he got involved with building the structures). His attitude seems insensitive weighed against your mother's illness, the debt your parents incurred to help you all, and the well-known expense of New York rent. Even recognizing that he built much of it, materials still had to be purchased, and it's not his property that he's making modifications to, but property nonetheless that he'll have use of. Unfortunately, probably no one bothered to get any of this agreement in writing so your parents' only real recourse is to have him vacate the premises if he is unwilling to abide by these terms.
2007-08-01 09:05:12 · answer #4 · answered by Captain S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So he built the place! That's the least he could do since he couldn't afford to buy a home for the two of you and it didn't even come out of his own pocket! He should be ashamed of himself and step up like a man and take on his responsibilities. By the way you have some really great parents! Good Luck!
2007-08-01 08:59:08 · answer #5 · answered by been there 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he is wrong, it is your family and plus they also have two of the kids living with them. He help out by building most of it does not make the money situation go away. They still have to pay back the money they used to build it.
2007-08-01 08:57:54 · answer #6 · answered by xyz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy, your parents sound like awesome people, as were mine. I hate to say this, but I think your guy is wrong. He doesn't sound like he respects what your folks did for you and him and your baby. Maybe you will have to put your foot down. I know how hard that is to do when you think you love someone. But, if he is like this now, chances are he won't change. Try talking it out and then decide what you will do if he doesn't budge. Believe me, I know how hard this would be for you. Good luck.
2007-08-01 09:00:26 · answer #7 · answered by melody 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to act like a man and help pay the bills. He is very wrong to think otherwise.
2007-08-01 08:55:40 · answer #8 · answered by Miss Holly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The "man of your dreams" is a juvenile terd. Sounds like a user. Bail and jump ship. Restraining order. Change locks. Move on.
2007-08-01 09:25:35 · answer #9 · answered by csiders30 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is not right or wrong he is a sorry excuse for a man if he thinks he doesnt have to pay rent and take care of his family. You may want to reconsider if he is the man and father for you and your children
2007-08-01 08:58:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
he's not a very nice person. i'm sure he does understand the bills involved.
next time your parents have someone build something, and expect rent as well, they need to make a lease agreement.... people suck, you know, and many don't have much integrity.
i feel badly for your family. i hope things work out.
2007-08-01 08:57:29 · answer #11 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋