How would handle liars that are in your own family? Any one?

Question

My brother and I had a great relationship up until he lied about his health. He claimed he had a mental problem. I know for a fact he had every test doen under the sun, and all the tests came normal. He used my mom (deceased) emotions and money. Lived with my dad for 9 mos. never dropping a small amount of money. He lied to his friends and family. Everyone he fooled them his wife,kids and my dad. He borrowed money from my dad to pay bills in stead he took $700.00 and went to Washington state to visit an old friend. It p*** me off that he would do that to family. I told him that he is NOT going to take advantage of my husband and me. My dad is mad at me because of it. He lied about everything he has done in the past 17 years!

Answer 1

You need to let him know that you know what he is about, then tell him to keep his distance from you. There will be times that you will be around him, but stay cordial and then go your own way. Dont complain about him to dad cause it sounds like dads in denial. Liars usually stay liars forever, I was married to one. Let him go on as he has been, but you stay out of it even though I know you want to say something. He will be found out soon enough. Good luck.

Answer 2

I have a brother that use to steal anything at value out of my bedroom and sell it for anything to buy drugs. I made it clear that family or not, if I ever catch him doing it again than I'm calling the cops.

Also I had a blood cousin over to my place one time for a little house party and guess what, when I was a bit buzz and acting like I'm neat passing out, he stole some money $200 out of my room and I pretty much know it was him. Will I even had a friend seeing it. It's hard to say something yet it hards really bad that family would do that. Now I try to stay way form them and never trust them and knowing that it not my fault I had to do that.

Answer 3

Does he have any medications or anything to back up his claim? He has some type of problem because this is not normal behavior. Sounds like he just decided he didn't really want to work for anything and concocted this lie as his way out. You are right to stand firm and call his bluff. I know parents can be blind to so many things when it comes to their children regardless of their age. All you can do is try to protect your father even if he is upset with you. Your brother is not going to stop especially since he's been carrying on this charade for 17 years! It's unbelievable to what lengths some people will go.

Answer 4

Yeah I can understand how you are feeling. You get people like that too, not everyone is good. But since he is your brother, I think he struggling inside his mind or he must be suffering from something which he doesn't like to tell you all. Show him more love and care. They need love when they deserve it least. Hatred will give more problems. Everything will be fine. I think he needs somebody to talk to. Just give it a try. This is really sad actually when your own brother tells lies. I can imagine how you are feeling... Have faith and try. Think of a good solution since youa re the one who knows him very well.
Good luck!

Answer 5

A classic case of a congenital deadbeat.You will be well advised to maintain your distance
from this moocher.By the way,you mentioned that your dad is mad at you because you told your sibling off.Is your dad a very wealthy man
who can afford to let his money go down the drain or is he a masochist?Sorry,no offense,
just thought I'd ask.

Answer 6

Ignore and avoid him. You don't have to say "I'm ignoring you" just do it. You have the right to place qualifications on who ever will be a guest in your house. Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean that you owe them something that you have to continue to pay indefinitely.

There is an old spanish proverb "Tell me with whom you walk with, and I'll tell you who you are." When aperson lies and continues to deliberately do bad things over a long period of time then if you continue to associate with that person you might be condoning what they do, and even worse, they might rub off on you. Is your brother the kind of person that you want to be?

Answer 7

I am sorry it has gotten to this point. I had a similar situation with my mother and I finally had to cut her out of my life 5 years ago. I know that sounds cruel but her lying ang the additonal stress was impacting my relationship and hurting my children. You have to draw a line somewhere and if he does not seek help and he crosses the line, your choice is clear. Good luck.

Answer 8

I know you are upset but have you considered that maybe he does have a mental condition? Find out what he claims to have and then research it. Find out all you can and then decide if he's lying or not. If he is then you shouldn't feel bad for not wanting to have anything to do with him. Talk to his wife. She probably knows him better than anyone.

Answer 9

Before starting, accusing him,just think....He may has a serious problem and he doesn;t want to tell you...He may need those money....
But if you are correct, just avoid him until he gets back to his normal life...
But if you had soo good relationship, how you;d never seen such as a behaviour like this before???

Answer 10

i have one like that. sounds like one of my sons. well he finally got off the drinking and drugs and you can't imagine how he is like now. i am not sure your borther has this. since you know this well you just keep your head and not let him use to. the parents are the ones that know and help and they know what they are getting into. we had coucnelor tell us that now is time to leave him period if he does something so we will and that is entire family tough love and it will be the last thing i do if he does something wrong. so its in your ball park.