Why is that? A Parents can take care of there Children, BUT Children cant when Parents are Old ?

Answer 1

Well in an Islamic society, we take care of our elders.. We dont ship them off to retirement homes... Its unheard of to abandon the elderly.. You see large family homes where there will be grandparents, parents, children and grandchildren all living happily under one roof.. Everyone stays together.. community, and family life is strong.. Especially in the middle eastern cultures.. I am from SaudiArabia. and we would never do this to our elders.. besides they are a fountain of knowledge, they might be old and feeble, but if you ever sit down and just talk to them, you will learn so much about life.. its a wonder and a great feeling.

Answer 2

Well, the parents are responsible for the kids being in the world as they gave birth to them, parents were younger when they took care of the kids, and the kids were relatively healthy and grew up and away to take care of themselves.

On the other hand, the parents of adult children are adults who's strength and health is compromised by aging.

They don't remember, see, hear or taste well anymore and are giving to long-term care (unless seriously ill). They also come with an intact personality (i.e, not shaping them like you would a child) It is just different that's all. I think its much more work with an older adult than with a child because they have personal business, property, possessions etc.. But they are your parents so you should take care of them when they need you.

Answer 3

I've always wondered that too. Parents do so much for their children over the years (not just from birth until the kids are 18, but so many years beyond that) and children seem to forget that. I guess the children get involved and busy in their own lives and feel they don't have time for their parents as their parents age. That's so sad to me. I watched both of my parents reach out to their parents as they got older and I can tell my grandparents really appreciated the help they received from their children. I will take care of my parents when they are old and need help taking care of themselves, because they sacrificed a lot for me growing up, but more importantly, because I love them and they deserve that attention and respect.

I'm American and my husband is Mexican. In May, my grandmother had a major stroke and died a week later. She made it clear a long time ago that if a situation like that ever came up, she didn't want to be on life support or anything like that. So she stayed in the hospital a couple days and was then transferred to a nursing home for specialized care. My husband's mother was appalled that my family would even consider putting my grandmother in a nursing home, despite her deteriorating health My husband had to explain to his mother that American nursing homes are much different from Mexican ones...in Mexican ones, the care is really bad and you never send a loved one there. Mexican families take care of their elderly family members at home. His mother was reassured when she heard that American nursing homes offer medical care and such. The reason I say all this is because I think it's interesting how different cultures view their elderly family members. I think American culture could benefit from cultures like Mexico and other cultures with similar beliefs...we should be more willing to take care of our elderly relatives instead of blowing them off.

Answer 4

Aly, unfortunately the majority of people in North America have this idea that they need to get out of the family home & get out on their own. Stupid thing is that girls do it so that they can build their own little nest and start dating & having relations, and guys do it so that they can feel cool and start having seks.

What young people don't think of is the cost of having their own place versus the opportunity cost of staying at home and yes putting up with the rules of the parental unit. Let's say rent is $600, cable & phone is $100, having to do your own grocery shopping $300. That's $1000 per month that could have been saved.

From 18 to 28 that 120 months or $120,000 without growth. With growth @ 10% it's over $206,000. What could a 28 year old that maybe is getting married and getting ready to move out do with $206, 552. By a house, go on a honeymoon, payoff college debt, buy a car. Choices are endless.

Parents in some cases force the kids out when they say you're 18 move out. Well if you bring your kids up in that environment what do you think is going to happen when the parent is old and becomes dependent. Old folks home....

In many middle east, asian and european cultures families stick together til the children are ready to marry and move out. Some don't even move out then they live with the parents or inlaws. Why do you think some cultures give a house as a wedding present to the kids..get em out in a nice way.

Their is nothing wrong with living home and staying together and returning to your parents some care in their golden years for the care they provided for you when you were growing up. Our culture needs an adjustment. We have too much freedom with little responsibility.

Answer 5

Children do take care of their parents. If you ever vist the AARP message boards you will find people asking all kinds of questions and seeking help with the parents in their homes. However, sometime the loved one requires more care that can be given at home. The decision to place a loved one in a skilled nursing facility is a difficult one. If you had the choice of having a parent in your home who needed more care than you could provide or placing the parent in a skilled nursing facility where that parent would receive excellent care, what would your choice be?

Answer 6

While I applaud children who do take care of their parents, they are wonderful kind and caring people.
I do wonder why so many people think it their right to expect so much of their kids.
We were only blessed with one child who unfortunately died when he was 33, but we choose to have him to love and take of. Not to look after us when we grew old and infirm.

Circumstances don't always allow the children to be able to do as much as parents would like, You've brought them up and have to accept that they go out into the big world wide and start their own generation. Sometimes they are so busy you feel like they've forgotten you. I'm sure they haven't, just be proud that you brought them up to be the people they are today.

I sense you are feeling hurt by the way you have worded your question. I may be reading you totally wrong, so I apologise in advance if I am mistaken.
So think positive! and have a lovely day x

Answer 7

this is not 100% true, there are cases where childerns take care of parents very well. As people are becoming modern, it is getting reduced. We can not blame on childern also, as each individual has his own priorities. One will say I can't spend money, one will say i have not time....

But the point here is Parents should also get modernised and they have to build self confidence and keep some bank balance for their future life (before retirement). At the same time what childern should do "atleast they should give moral support to their parents".

There is no rule saying as parents taken care their childern, Now childern should take care of their parents. That is INDIVIDUAL responsibilty to do that. If one fails in that, no body may not question him. But his/her inner sense will tell.

Answer 8

Most don't want to deal with it. I am the only child in my family who is reliable to help Dad with Mom when the going gets tough. My husband is the only child in his family that stops by everyday to check on his Dad and do chores for him on weekends. Everyone else thinks because we live the closest that it is our job. Ironically, we are the only ones raising a family of three children, too. What's even more exciting is that we are constantly being fussed at by the other brothers and sisters as to what we should and shouldn't be doing. It all boils down to this. If you live close by, check on your parents several times a week. If you live out of town, send money to help with expenses or call.

Answer 9

Because what parents do for children is selfless, and those offspring believe it is their due. Nothing ever disabuses them of that notion, so when they get older, they take and take but never learned to give.

I know my brother and his wife wanted to help my mother, but it was just impossible, and my mother was too set in her ways to adapt to their adult lifestyle. Mom was much happier in a group setting. We didn't know at the time how little time she had left.

That, again, was more of the parental giving thing. Even as we were growing to be more independent, Mom still wanted to help. She bought nursing home insurance and swore she'd never live with one of us or be a burden.

Answer 10

God puts things in motion in many ways that we are unable to recognize at the time it is happening. I cared for my husband before he passed and had my mother move into my home so that neither of us would be alone. She was 80 and in good health. Then without any warning or symptoms she went blind, could not walk and was halucinating. I too had vowed she would never go to a nursing home but I was unable to keep that vow. She fell out of her recliner and I was40 min getting her into a sitting position on the floor and then I had to physically lift her into the chair as she could not help me to get her up. It would take 20 min to manuver from the living room to the bathroom as she would see holes in the floor or no floor. The halucinations became scary I had gone to the other room for something and when I came back in she asked me Who the man in the hall was I saw no man she said the one in white, then later she asked me who was that Nun sitting in my chair and said she had gone upthe stairs ( my house is 1 story) or she would be talking to her relatives who had long ago passed. It broke my heart to put her into the nursing home and thankfully she did not linger. The diagnosis was Alzheimers but I don't know as within one month of symptoms she was gone. So don't judge all children who have to put one of their family into a nursing home some of us don't have a choice and really do love and cherish our parents.