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She's majorly Over protective. I'm not allowed to speak to people at my neighborhood not even if their younger.. I'm on the computer like 24/7 because she doesn't let me hang out with other children. I'm almost 14 years of age, I home school. Well my dad wants to take me Saterday and Sunday, but my mom won't accept this. She told me if I accepted to go with my father only Saterday and Sunday she would leave me.. have another family.. forget me.. I don't even have a friend besides people on the internet. If I sit down and talk to her whatever I try she will win the conversation. If I ask her why I can't talk to my neighbors.. she responds with telling me their street children. I really want to go with my dad at least Saterday's and Sunday's. The problem is I really don't want to risk losing my mother, but I want to spend some quality time with my father.. Anyone have a suggestion.. an answer? If so thanks, 10 points to who is a bit of help or so.

2007-07-31 19:33:56 · 22 answers · asked by princess 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

Most of you said I should talk to her.
If I asked her to let me have friends she wouldn't care the least bit.

My mother and father are currently in the middle of divorcing. I think my mom is telling me the truth about this.. once she did leave me for a night, just to show me she isn't liying.. she even has a suit case ready.

2007-07-31 20:00:25 · update #1

22 answers

she loves you a lot...

2007-08-08 18:46:54 · answer #1 · answered by seema m 2 · 0 1

i dont know where you live.. but unless your dad has done somehting wrong to you or illegal that got him in trouble with the law, then she can not keep you from him, it is illegal. Also, keeping you in the house all day and not lettign you have any relationships other than her.. that is just wrong in so many ways. CHildren who are kept "locked up" have social problems later in life, also become more rebellious in the end and act out and defy rules more than kids who are loved and have the opportunity to go out and do things.. within boundaries, yes. What you mom is doing by telling you that she will leave you... you are 14- she is legally responsible for you. If she leaves you, that would be child abbandonment. Also, by telling you she will leave you and things lie that, that is emotional abuse also.... DOes your mom ever work or leave you alone? I would suggest finding some counceling centers or free 800 numbers and talking to sumone about it while she isnt there. Also, you are old enough that if it were to go to court- you would have a say in seeing your father and they would have to honor that... your mother would have to let you see him or she could get in trouble

2007-07-31 20:18:06 · answer #2 · answered by amandica82 4 · 2 0

In this world there are many abusive people. People are abusive because they fear losing control or they were taught to be abusive at a young age. I'm sorry to say this, but your mom is abusive. She is abusing you. She is not showing her love and her trust in your free thinking and independence. And she is threatening you by saying she would leave you?! She's your mother! A mother should never ever act and say such things. She should love you unconditionally. So, I say, go with your father, live with him and try to talk to your mom, but if she's being this toxic, it might be better to walk away for a while until you get older and can come back when you can speak your mind to her better. Not that you're not eloquent right now, but I know how hard it can be to get the right words out without getting them turned back onto you, making you feel worse than before you started talking. Good luck.

2007-07-31 19:46:00 · answer #3 · answered by MelBu 3 · 2 0

You know what sweety, it sound like your mom has a lot of hatred towards your father, and she's using you to get back at him for whatever he did to her .So your caught in the middle. I'm sorry for that. I know it must b hard. But what your mother is doing to you is called mental abuse, and if you think she's serious about leaving you, then she doesn't really love you she's just using you to get back at your father for whatever he did. No mother in her right mind would ever do that to her child, i know i'm a mother, of five boys, and i love them so much, i'd never leave them no-matter what. If i were you i'd go live with my father. You deserve a life away from the computer. You should be able to have some kind od freedom. tell another adult what's going on. TELL YOUR FATHER

2007-08-08 16:04:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I am going to make this very short because you have gotten a lot of great answers........ your mom is being abusive. Call or email your dad and ask to live with him. Go to a public school and start living a normal life. If your dad needs to go to court to make this official you can tell the judge exactly what your mom has done. And at 14 a judge will listen to you and almost let you decide where you want to live. It sounds like you might be much better off living with your father. Good luck honey

2007-08-08 14:45:38 · answer #5 · answered by billies35 3 · 1 0

Talk to your mother. Tell her that you would like to send some time with your father or better yet tell your father to talk to your mother and ask if you may have an hour away from her a week as long as he can be with you. Maybe next time 2 hours, then 3 hours or so on. Show some responsibilty. Promise me that you stop telling to people on the internet you get into more trouble then just being alone. Wish you luck.

2007-08-07 14:23:03 · answer #6 · answered by Ann Marie 2 · 0 0

Your mother will not leave you if you go to your Dad's. She is emotionally abusing you and your really need to let your father know. You need to visit with your father to have normal interactions. Your Mom is just saying those things to scare you and make you feel guilty. You need to break away slowly not too fast but do not let yourself be trapped in life by someone like her. The thing is she has her own issues and it's not your fault. The main thing is to talk to your Dad and get out of there on the weekends. It might only be two days but that's two day to be free and to live life with someone else other then your Mom.

Do you live in the US?

2007-07-31 19:50:15 · answer #7 · answered by TandL 3 · 1 0

Well, honey, you have the right to see your father. Talk to her an see if maybe she will agree to limited hours at first, and if she refuses, then I think she needs help mentally, there might be something wrong. There is no excuse for her to hide you from the world. Yes, it is crazy out there but, she is only hurting you by keeping you locked up. And youe father should not allow this to happen. What is going to happen when you become an adult, you won't know how to function in the real world.

2007-08-08 14:54:31 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle V 1 · 0 0

Unfortunately your mom has some issues she needs to resolve. she is not doing you any good by keeping you locked up. maybe you should consider talking to your dad about this, you do not have to tell her. at 14 you should not be on the internet all the time. you should be out playing or whatever. if you mom is threatening to leave you, let her; see how far she gets and for how long. maybe she needs a little reality wake up. (she should not be threatening you with this; it is a manipulation ploy-for lack of a better word-on her part. we as parents should never threaten to leave our kids, for this does not make the child feel loved and they feel they have to "do" certain things to be loved--when in fact a parents love is unconditional...... this is way to much for you to handle at your age. your dad can also fight for visitation rights and you can appear in court and speak for yourself. You mom sounds like she is very angry at something, to bad you couldnt find out what that was. also, try to find out why the outside is so bad for her... why does she feel the need to lock you up? if something traumatic happened to her when she was young, then she is probably trying to overly protect you from what happened to her.
how about if you tried to join a group or something she likes, that is just a suggestion... sometimes talking just doesnt work with people who are hurting inside, because what they want to say doesnt come out the way it should and they end up hurting someone else in the meantime.
It is very important for a child if possible to have both parents in their life, positively ofcourse. there are some things a mom cant give to the kids and just the same for the dads, there are things they cant give~~ being male and female, i am referring to. being pent up in the house with no friends,,, you could let loose when you get out the door and get into wrong things. maybe talking with her doesnt help, try having her just listen to you and her not speak. say your feelings and walk away and leave her something to think about. AND dont let her continue the converation. tell her you are done and she has thinking to do.

2007-08-08 09:27:05 · answer #9 · answered by WILDFIREJOANN 3 · 1 0

Im kinda shock with your mom's attitude. I mean how could she stop you from seeing your dad? That is very selfish of her. I think you are old enough (quite old enough i guess) to decide what's right for you. I mean, what harm could your dad do? I think she's just scared you might choose your dad over her. You need to seek the help of your other relatives, like your aunts or uncles so they could talk to your mom. If they will know what your mom've been telling you, I'm sure they will help you.

Just be a good kid. Assure her of your love. Tell her that spending time with your dad, or with other people won't take you away from her.

2007-07-31 19:43:39 · answer #10 · answered by jen_good girl 3 · 1 0

...
Maybe you just have to put up with her a bit longer. I know it's frustrating, she is holding u back form showing that u are actually smart. And.. your mother doesn't really have the right to keep you from seeing your father, if she insists on leaving in that case, then there is a big possibility she doesn't love you, sorry. BUt if ur positive she does, then it should be ok, she won't leave u.

2007-08-07 18:16:45 · answer #11 · answered by lynxmcromance 4 · 0 0

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