Spoiled baby?

Question

Okay so my son is 3 months and 2 weeks. Everytime I put him down he cries...and cries. Its wearing my patience thin because it is impossible to hold him all day until his father gets here after work about 6. How do I make him stop? I have tried everything...and i know he isnt hungry, wet, etc.. he just NEEDS to be held.

Answer 1

My 3 month old son is exactly the same, it is very exhausting since I also have a 5, 4, and 2 year old!! This time will pass by quickly, enjoy the snuggles now. Some babies just need more love and attention. They think that when they can't see or feel you that you disappear, they have no "object permanence"(?) yet at this age. My son barely naps ever unless he is held. My first daughter was the same way but the next 2 girls were more tolerant. My husband has to get him to sleep at night since if I hold him he just wants to eat, eat, eat! Good luck with him.

Answer 2

Some babies NEED to be held, and your job as a parent right now is to teach that baby that he can trust you. If he needs to be held and you don't hold him, then the message is that he can't trust you.

He has plenty of time to be independent from you in his life. At 3 months, this is not the time. I promise you this -- if you hold him all the time NOW, he's not going to need you to hold him so much LATER because he will know he can trust you to be there for him no matter how difficult it got for you.

What you need is a sling or baby harness that will let you carry the baby while your arms are free to get things done. When his daddy gets home, give the man a chance to put down his things, change, shower or whatever, then hand him the baby and say, "He's been waiting to see you all day. I know he just wants to hold you while you (watch tv or surf the net or whatever)..." Then you can get your break from holding the baby....make it a long one!

Answer 3

Being a mommy is such hard work. It requires you giving yourself completely to this little person...And that means you may be spent emotionally & physically by day's end. It may feel like you are being worn down, little by little...But we've all been there. You push thru those tough times when you are just so tired because you love that sweet miracle of yours. No one can take care of that baby the way you can...So you just do it, honey. Just remember you are laying the groundwork, the very foundation of his ability to trust. When he tries to tell you he needs you, let him know you are there for him. This stage will pass so quickly, sweetie, and you will be the one wishing he would cuddle with you just a little bit more! For those times when you are feeling overwhelmed, put him down. Swaddle him in a blankie, place him in a swing, set him down in a vibrating chair, put him in a sling or carrier...There are lots of options out there. But always make sure that he is number one on your list...I promise you will make it through the "needy" times. Also, make sure there is nothing else that may cause him discomfort like acid reflux or if he is hot. Good Luck and enjoy your miracle!

Answer 4

Yes, he NEEDS to be held... It's a need.

Get a sling, or a wrap and go about your business. He's not spoiled, he's normal... possibly "high needs", but not spoiled.

I mean is he spoiled because you feed him when hes hungry? Or change him when he's dirty? Close contact with mom is a need just like any other... it can be hard, i know, but stop fighting it and it will be a little easier.

Oh, and when he gets to be around 7-8 mo and he won't let you out of his sight... thats normal too, its called seperation anxiety and it doesn't mean he's "spoiled".

You can't spoil a baby with love and attention, you spoil kids with material items.

Answer 5

There is no such thing as a spoiled baby, especially that young. He loves you. Try laying him on a blanket on the floor, with a toy overhead. Lay next to him, talk to him, move the toy, etc. Get him used to that. After awhile, you should be able to get up and he wont notice you're gone. Remember, you are a mom now, your life will never be the same as it was before.

Answer 6

I agree, buy a sling. You're right. He NEEDS to be held at this age. He isn't spoiled, he loves his mommy.

I sympathize, I really do. I remember how tough it is. But my son is 5 months old and he plays independently for up to 20 minutes at a time. So it does get better soon.

SillyGirl, that was a very rude response. It wasn't helpful at all. She's a new mommy and she needs help. Shame on you.

Answer 7

He is not spoiled- he NEEDS TO BE HELD!
Get a sling. Put him in a different position- on the floor, in a bouncy seat, etc.
Attention...they need to be nurtured.

I think you need to get a grip- he is only a baby- and some babies need more attention than others.

Answer 8

DEAL with it baby cry and that young they cry alot their is nothing that will make him stop. My son cried for the first 6months and he would get him self so upset he would throw up so just carry him hold him he will never be 3months old ever again try to enjoy it. Get on of those carriers that you wear that's what I did and when I had to work or whatever I made my brother put it on and carry him.

Your baby is not spoiled unless you consider being carried for 9Mon's inside the most safe and cozy place in the world his mother womb spoiled.

Enjoy your baby

Answer 9

your right he NEEDS to be held, just like he NEEDS to eat and NEEDS his diaper changed, it is a need, he will out grow it , but for now it is a need that needs to be met, he is not spoiled, he is 3 months old, there is not anything you have to do that is more important then your child's needs right now, wearing your patience, wow, get into a support group, this is only the beginning, you need to ask for some help from family and friends

Answer 10

You answered your own question- he needs to be held. It's as much of a biological need as food and warmth.

Wearing my baby in a sling was a huge help to me at that age. I was able to get things done around the house while I met my baby's needs.