my boyfriend and i have a different outlook when it comes to wearing clothes that have stains and/or holes. i believe in always looking presentable and he always says 'oh no one will notice'. half the time he'll wear AE polo shirts, and the other half he'll wear ratty old t-shirts - sometimes out in public. this drives me nuts, and lately i bought him two nice t-shirts from old navy. is it wrong of me to step in and speak up about what he wears and buy him new clothes to hopefully sift out the nasty shirts he has?
2007-07-31 03:16:11 · 12 answers · asked by niugirl1114 3 in Beauty & Style ➔ Other - Beauty & Style
My husband and I are the same way. I come from a family that considers golf shirts and khakis casual wear. He comes from a family that considers golf shirts and khakis dressed up. He is the only one in his family who has a job that requires office casual attire. Sometimes, like for funerals or Sunday morning, etc. button downs and ties and a jacket (if not a full suit) are needed. (My husband is a seminary student and is working as a student pastor.) Mostly on his off days, in summer, he'll wear kahaki shorts and a Tshirt. I don't mind, it doesn't look too bad, and if the shirt is spotty, holy, etc., he won't normaly wear it out of the house. (Some of his family wears clothes that are way ratty to the point that I wouldn't even wear them around the house, let alone out in public. For me, they would be cut up for rags.) Occasionaly, depending on the situation, he will put on a golf shirt with his khaki shorts.
While I don't care for his shorts, they don't look bad. I don't like them because they have a drawstring. He once told me that he likes them like that so if he gains weight, his shorts will still fit. I don't like it because I see it as an excuse to eat more. (he does have regular button fly pants.)
We've always been like this. I'll wear an old blouse that still looks decent and a pair of old khaki pants or shorts or jeans around the house (and step into some loafers and a blazer, depending on the season just to go out for dinner or to the grocery store), while he'll be wearing clothes on his off day, out of the house, that I would consider pajamas. Sometimes I think he does it to irritate me, and it does. Only because last winter he would complain that his jeans were too tight, but wear his sweats so he wouldn't have to worry about it. (My husband is overweight and he doesn't eat very well, and it worries me. The drawstring pants thing is not a fashion issue with me, but a health issue. Yes, with my pregnancy I can understand the comfort of those things, I wear my old gym shorts, pajama pants, sweats, etc. around the house when my regular jeans and khakis started to get too tight and I hadn't gotten maternity clothes yet. Some of my dress pants fitted longer, and I would put those on just to go grocery shopping or something becuase they were comfortable.) I digress.
Yes, tell him what you like. Go shopping with him and help him buy something for himself, not you buy it for him, as he might be offended. Also, if that's the "worst" thing about him, live with it or break up with him. Yes, I did date men who dressed "better" than my husband. However, they aren't the ones I married. Even now, nine years (maybe eight and a half) after our first date and six years of marriage it hasn't changed much and when I am visiting his family, I still feel dressed up in comparison, even if I'm "just" in jeans, a button down, or golf shirt and my loafers. I did not fall in love with him for his clothes or what he did and didn't wear. I did not marry him for his clothes and what he does and does not wear. Sure, clothing is a relfection of one's personality, but my husband does know how to dress appropriately for the situation. That's what matters.
2007-07-31 04:27:23 · answer #1 · answered by Vegan_Mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend is the same way. He doesn't really care how he looks....but his hygiene is good. He will wear the rattiest things...wrinkled and all.
I buy him nice stuff and every now and again I will secretly toss out a shirt or something that is bad. so I am slowly but surely getting him in the things I prefer he wear out. I also make sure he gets lots of compliments when he dresses nicer. It makes him feel good about it so he wont resent it when I suggest it.
I try not to nag him about it and make suggestions when we are going places special and let him wear what he wants if we are not going anywhere special.
2007-07-31 03:30:04 · answer #2 · answered by nappyhdfatgrl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not the wrong thing to do, but it's not the right thing to do. Yes, as his girlfriend you have little right to have a say in what he wears, and the same with him. But, if it is what he is comfortable in then let it be. You know that he has clothes that are presentable, so if the situation arises then he will wear them. However, if you are going to the mall on a Saturday or just going to Wal-Mart then it doesn't really matter. On a date, however, he should look presentable. It is what he feels comfortable in, and it should be left alone.
2007-07-31 03:25:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No my ex bf would never buy me things if I wasn't there!! He wasn't even a really macho type guy, so I think most men would have an issue with doing this. He once went to the till for me to pay for some clothes and what not, and he made it really clear to the woman serving they were for his girlfriend, not him!! It's a male pride thing, us girls wouldn't have a problem with it the other way around! :)
2016-04-01 02:45:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like I have that same experience with every guy I date. Just remember that no matter how horrible you think his style may be, it's still HIS style. There's nothing wrong with surprising your boyfriend with new clothes, just make sure that when you're picking something out that it compliments his taste too. In other words, be careful not to force your boyfriend into something that you would wear if your were a guy. Make every effort to understand his own personal tastes when shopping for clothes.
2007-07-31 03:34:23 · answer #5 · answered by Jason 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all well and good to want him to look presentable and to maybe buy him a few clothes here and there but if he likes what he already has let him be. Thats who he is and you have to accept him for it. It's different if it's like in front of your family or something but if its just around you maybe hes just comfortable enough with you that he can do that and expect you not to judge him?
2007-07-31 03:27:03 · answer #6 · answered by GreenEyedGemini 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no not really but dont make him mad because it will be really stupid if u loose someone u love over his clothes,lol o just tell him how u feel and hopefully he'll change but in the meantime his ratty shirts could "dissapear" lol ~xoxo
2007-07-31 03:20:29 · answer #7 · answered by Erin Elaine. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nope
u should totally talk to him about this
or else u'll spend all ur $$ on him
just tell him i know u don't really care and think others don't notice
but i don't wanna be embarrassed so can u just change before we go out
cuz i care what others think
hope this helps
2007-07-31 03:25:16 · answer #8 · answered by justcurious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i tink if u go straight up 2 him n talk he might not like it....maybe u can buy him clothes juz 2 surprise him sumtimes..hehe...or at times juz tell him that he dont look good in old clothes...try not to hurt his feelings...tell him indirectly....it might work but it will take sum time....
2007-07-31 03:23:43 · answer #9 · answered by hush pup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make him do it himself he should care about how he looks himself i really rely on first impressions. holes and stains are nasty
2007-07-31 03:27:08 · answer #10 · answered by Toast 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋